feeling deffective

[Guest Joshua-Christopher]

hey everybody its Josh. I went to a family reunion today and i saw all my little cousins and all my family and I couldn't help but think about how they were born right they were born the way they should have been and I was born "defective" i was born wrong. I was born in the wrong body and i have to pay so much money just to "fix" myself. I dont know if anybody else feels this way?

[Guest angels wings]

I think many would feel this way Josh .like any other condition some you can improve with medication and surgury some u can't . Having this condition has hope you are able to take steps to be you and that is a blessing . ((((( hugs))))))

Angel

[Sally]

Josh, I find a great deal of comfort in not thinking of myself as defective just different.

We all have a choice in so many things in life in how to perceive them as either a problem or a gift, a blessing or a curse - no one can decide that for you - this is all up to you.

I see myself not as defective but gifted - I have had the opportunity (not a handicap) of living my life in both genders - I understand much better than most how much of being a man or a woman is a part of societal expectations and what is real.

You can look at it in the positive light and not have to bemoan anything that you might have missed along the way because you have lived what so many others can never know.

Love ya,

Sally

[Candykane]

Josh,

I felt the same way as you discribed when I was a child and could not understand "why". I would go out at night, look to the heavens and tell God how much I hated him. But as you grow you will find ways to sooth the girl inside. I believe you will follow the right path and hopefully the pain will ease up a little.

Candy Kane

[Guest Joshua-Christopher]

Candykane there is absolutly no girl inside me there is no girl at all nothing at all about me is girl. my body is just something im forced to carry around but nothing female bout me

[Guest ~Brenda~]

I think sometimes one forgets what forum they are in and what gender one is addressing.

Please everyone, be sensitive and aware of the gender of the person you are talking to. To address an MTF as a guy or an FTM as a girl is as bad as using the wrong pronouns.

People do make mistakes sometimes. So try to be patient...OK?

Love.

Brenda

[Guest angels wings]

We understand Josh (((((( hugs))))))

Keep marchin forth matey

Angel

[Charlize]

Jayson,

Somehow i learned to live as a man. It was something we used to be forced into regardless and with violence as it was deemed necessary. It would have been lovely to not have had this part of me full of unrest and then doubt as hormones played with my life. I now look back and have to admit that its been a good life anyway. My true joy is that now i'm closer to being the woman i've always been.

Hang in there and try to make the best of what you can. You might always feel that things are wrong if you let yourself. Try to let that go and accept that we are different and have to live with that. Gives us something no one else has which is why we can share here and understand the pain and joys we all feel.

Hugs,

Charlie

[Guest miss kindheart]

Hi Josh,

<<< not a hug >>>>

Sorry your feeling down about this

I think your very special guy

With a great heart

Don't ever let any one put you down

Not even yourself

You will figure this all out and be a far better person for it

Peace be with you

vanna

[Guest ~Brenda~]

Hi Jayson,

Please accept my apologies for not directly addressing your topic before. Feeling as yourself should never be clouded by feelings of insecurity or defectiveness. Each person has the right to feel that who they are is just fine. This sounds great, but self loathing can still remain. When time and money permits, please see a gender therapist...OK? To sort out these kinds of feelings is exactly why they exist.

Love.

Brenda

[Guest Joshua-Christopher]

~Brenda~ i have a therapist..a gender therapist