I Wish...

[Guest letmebe_me]

i went shopping 2day and saw this guy who was probably around my age (19) and i was so jealous of him. it sucks. i notice guys all the time and how i wish i was born looking naturally that way too does anyone else notice guys in this way too? it just kinda ruins the day, i feel pretty depressed now.

i also had a guy looking at me and he was smiling and it just made me feel so uncomfy. im not girly but u can tell im a girl. i hate it when that happens cos im into girls. so yeah. kinda feel crappy today

sorry for moaning

[Guest matthew41]

i went shopping 2day and saw this guy who was probably around my age (19) and i was so jealous of him. it sucks. i notice guys all the time and how i wish i was born looking naturally that way too does anyone else notice guys in this way too? it just kinda ruins the day, i feel pretty depressed now.

i also had a guy looking at me and he was smiling and it just made me feel so uncomfy. im not girly but u can tell im a girl. i hate it when that happens cos im into girls. so yeah. kinda feel crappy today

sorry for moaning

Hey Daniel,

Expressing your feelings is good. I have been there and done that too. I used to "body shop" so to speak too and found it revolting at times when guys checked me out. So to reshaping mine, I took long walks with my dog and bought a simple dumbbell set and started lifting weights. Over time my hips slimed down and my shoulders widened. I got compliments that I walked like an athlete... . But I knew it was my own preparation for my future real life test. It also just made me feel better because the exercise uplifted my mood.

Matt

[Zufrieden]

Coming from the other direction...

I notice women's bodies an awful lot more. I'm not jealous, nor do I pick out which "model" I'd want to be. I'm just amazed at the variety. I just think, "Ha, I'm going to be one of them someday."

Z.

[Guest mr_marc]

I get that sometimes and just tell myself to get on with it lol.

But it does really really straw inhaler -huggles-

[Guest CharlesMonroe]

I know what you mean. I think every FTM has probably gone through this. As for guys checking you out *shudders*, because i dress very masculine it doesn't happen a lot, when it does i just glare at them till they stop looking

I'm trying to change my body by weight lifting and running. However, its hard to get on a regular routine as i have exams at school this year. It is all a bit depressing, but i just try and get on with it and focus on the future.

[Guest mr_marc]

Luckily, i dont have that. Had it with a few gay guys though...

But their probably looking trying to tell what i actually am XD

But still, when they do i ignor her cause it is a lil creepy...

[Guest CharlesMonroe]

Heh, i get that. People staring at me trying to work out what i am Actually the only guys to ever display a real interest in me have been bisexual. I get checked out more by girls than guys on the whole. The ones who randomly check me out on the street are usually just staring at my C cup boobs Hence, the glaring. I can't wait till i get my binder...

[Nick J]

know the feeling dude - constantly being surrounded by bio guys is horrible - especially the ones who can wear t shirts and shorts.

As for the staring thing - i get it so much.. but then again i always have

sorry about last night on IM i was playing a game and left my messenger on, i straw inhaler sorry

talk soon dude

[Guest letmebe_me]

hey everyone thanks for your replies. i feel a lil better now but i just keep thinkin of that guy and i wish i could be more like him and more jealous of the fact he was born like it! kinda annoying! i got my hair cut the other day rly short (kinda like mr marcs hair), shorter than wat ive ever had it b4 and my bro dint even recognise me from da back lol he thought i was a guy hah so yeah that cheered me up actually! tho 2 him i was like shut up! lol im also startin 2 work out as ive heard a lot of ftm's say it helps and makes them more masculine looking my main prob is my breasts r like pretty big. i mean i can wear baggy stuff and all but i cant seem 2 hide them watever i do lol so i get guys starin at me and stuff and i hate it! thats the 1 thing i hate the most about myself. theres a lot i want to change but u know what i mean? hey nick its cool, i thought u might have been doin somethin cos ur status set to away chat 2 u soon

[Guest brandt]

hey,

i know how ya feel. im sure all the ftms or most have that feeling. i go to school and i see the guys and i see the girls looking at them and i get jealous because usually i want to be that guy that the girls are lookin at. so its pretty hard. when i go out i see guys and i get jealous of them because of their body. i wish i had their body all the time. but unfortunantly for me. im pretty puiny . especially for my age, well kinda. i look more like a 10 year old boy than a 15 year old one. i can pretty much pass as a little boy but yea. at some points im pretty lucky . having small breasts and being able to hide curves very easily. when going out i usually am dressed as a boy and i cut my hair recently and its pretty short. but its growing long pretty fast, faster than i have expected. but all in time ill get another hair cut ,

my little neice thought i was a boy . it made me happy. so sure i want to be that natural boy. but someday i will be able to have a body like a regular guy.

[Flint]

I get jelous. i just want to be born like them. i see them as lucky people, to be born with the body that matches there gender. and wish i was born that way it can be depressing.

[Guest letmebe_me]

exactly how i feel matty, it sucks doesnt it

[Flint]

College is proving to be a perfect example of this jelousy for me....most of the students in my class are boys too...but biologically guys......and i'm especally jelous of particular lads becausue i dunno.....I have an obsession with beards....any guy with a beard he has grown on his own i get jelous off lol!! Cause iwanna grow my own beard.... sounds stupid, and petty i know....but........yea......

*Wheels away quickly*

[Guest Madison_Always]

its so weird i feel the same thing w/ me except vice versa i get envious when i see girls shaved legsand them in skirts in public i wish we could just trade genders

[Guest GoldenKirbichu]

I feel the same way. My dad, my biomale cousins, my friends... I wish I could be them, I wish I had their male bodies and their parts that match up right. They're accepting and all, they try their hardest to make me feel like one of them, but it's not the same as if I actually had it. Sometimes I almost wanna cry. But I don't cry much anymore.

[Guest Marco]

i know exactly how you feel. i've been jealous like that since i was maybe 7. but i'm really lucky that guys don't check me out because i would just lose it. weight lifting really does help though especially shoulder exercises.

[Guest Cal]

College is proving to be a perfect example of this jelousy for me....most of the students in my class are boys too...but biologically guys......and i'm especally jelous of particular lads becausue i dunno.....I have an obsession with beards....any guy with a beard he has grown on his own i get jelous off lol!! Cause iwanna grow my own beard.... sounds stupid, and petty i know....but........yea......

*Wheels away quickly*

I feel the exact same thing. I'm obsessed with facial hair and guy voices and chests and everything about guys. I used to think I might be bi, but I've come to realize it's just infatuation with every natural trait guys have that I can't have.

[Guest GoldenKirbichu]

I find myself constantly lamenting not having male genitals. That bothers me more than anything else - because it's the most obvious thing. Males have breasts [small ones, but they have them]. Males may not be hairy, or they may have high voices or small shoulders or wide hips...

But one thing most males will never have are female genitalia.

Sometimes I feel so useless without it. Who would ever want a man without the traditional male phallus? It's a crushing blow to my self-esteem sometimes; makes me feel like I'm not worth anything.

I want all of the physical bits of being male, sure; but the phallus is something that will probably be hardest to attain, and that frustrates me.

[Guest eragon]

I think it is natural for us to notice other men and want to be like them , jealousy of what we want but dont have is likly to ensue, and as for being noticed by guys, it has been told to me that I come off as a gay guy, so I accept that some guys who think I am are going to look, however I also think it is natural for us to think that we look more girly than we actualy do, I met this ftm and he totaly looks like a boy, but he dosent think so, we have to get over our own flaws if you will to be able to see that the majority of us pass alright without any help of testosteron, although it is nice to feel mor whole

[Guest CharlesMonroe]

LOL me and my boyfriend keep having arguments about who passes better. Is funny

[Guest GoldenKirbichu]

Yeah, I tend to make the assumption that I look more feminine than I actually am. I usually pass quite well, but I tend to think I don't.

[Guest silverpetals]

I find myself constantly lamenting not having male genitals. That bothers me more than anything else - because it's the most obvious thing. Males have breasts [small ones, but they have them]. Males may not be hairy, or they may have high voices or small shoulders or wide hips...

But one thing most males will never have are female genitalia.

Sometimes I feel so useless without it. Who would ever want a man without the traditional male phallus? It's a crushing blow to my self-esteem sometimes; makes me feel like I'm not worth anything.

a man is a man, with or without a boy thing

in pretty much the same way women in the media (and irl) are often objectified and reduced down to their physical appearance or sexual parts, a lot of the media and (sadly) a lot of society equate 'being a man' with 'having a pënis', and the more the pënis the more the man. big pënis good, small boy thing bad, no pënis--not a man?...right?

that's totally wrong and so degrading and probably offensive; pleeease don't let them get to you. society totally sucks sometimes but the only thing we can do is try to change it.

this might not help much, but it was only while i was trying to change the outside, that i realised the inside matters more. you have so much worth as a person, does lack of a pënis detract from that?

anyway, you're a guy not a pënis. i know how it feels, but please don't get too depressed about it.

would *hugs* make you feel any better?

I want all of the physical bits of being male, sure; but the phallus is something that will probably be hardest to attain, and that frustrates me.

i won't pop up and say "wanna swap?" or anything like that because that's just stupid and always reminds me that it's impossible, and a cruel world really...

it's a long shot and he obviously didn't like it (i find it a bit weird personally) but somebody must have seen this.

ps, sorry about the umlauts, it automatically changes the 'p' word to "boy thing"

like were not old enough

[Guest GoldenKirbichu]

a man is a man, with or without a boy thing

in pretty much the same way women in the media (and irl) are often objectified and reduced down to their physical appearance or sexual parts, a lot of the media and (sadly) a lot of society equate 'being a man' with 'having a pënis', and the more the pënis the more the man. big pënis good, small pënis bad, no pënis--not a man?...right?

that's totally wrong and so degrading and probably offensive; pleeease don't let them get to you. society totally sucks sometimes but the only thing we can do is try to change it.

this might not help much, but it was only while i was trying to change the outside, that i realised the inside matters more. you have so much worth as a person, does lack of a pënis detract from that?

anyway, you're a guy not a pënis. i know how it feels, but please don't get too depressed about it.

would *hugs* make you feel any better?

i won't pop up and say "wanna swap?" or anything like that because that's just stupid and always reminds me that it's impossible, and a cruel world really...

it's a long shot and he obviously didn't like it (i find it a bit weird personally) but somebody must have seen this.

ps, sorry about the umlauts, it automatically changes the 'p' word to "boy thing"

like were not old enough

Pënis... nice one. It's easier than substituting it with slang all the time.

I know that society is wrong. I know that it's a stupid way to look at things and that pënis =/= man. But it still makes me feel like I'm missing something...

And I would trade in a heartbeat if I could. Too bad it's not a reality.

[Guest Seth]

ALL THE TIME.

[Guest Orpheus]

Man,you`ve to learn how not to let yourself dwell on those thoughts or else you`ll just wreck yourself.

Ok,the guys are biomales but that doesn`t mean that they`ll get any girl they want.In fact,they can be complete arseholes and pretend to be someone they`re not just to get their way,whereas if a girl falls for you,she`ll fall for who you really are.

Like the other night I had some drunk chap nearly out me in public(he looked more like a girl himself) but that was contrasted by a really sweet guy who said I was so gorgeous i could`ve any guy i wanted.I genderall pass very well so that was a great compliment to have someone think I was the best looking guy in the bar(twa s gay bar btw ).

Once yous tart on T,the changes will be incredible.Although we may never become complete that doesn`t mean that we can`t be goodlooking!