Another Awkward Question..

[Guest My_Genesis]

This isn't the type of topic I like to post but since it's actually giving me problems with..erm..many other aspects of my life, I don't think I really have a choice anymore

So here's the thing. I've been taking anti-depressants for several years now...I don't really have much use for them and I could probably go off them, except rather than an anti-depressant I'd like to continue taking them as a sex drive suppresent. Maybe it's like a placebo effect or something, but if I skip more than one dose...

lol. So anyway, that's not really the problem. The problem is when I do skip more than one dose (which, between schoolwork and my horrible memory, is quite often) - if I'm not keeping my mind occupied on the internet or something (usually on here or on facebook...get your mind out of the gutter lol), like the minute I start studying, doing homework, or attempting to fall asleep, all I can think about is sex and I can't concentrate on anything else. And I know the obvious solution is just stop skipping doses lol. But I also have this problem when I don't skip. It just happens more frequently if I do. The other part of this problem is..I just don't get it, how do you all..ya know...because personally I just can't get anything out of it and that's probably another reason this is such an issue

So yeah that was my awkward question. lol. I mean basically it works until the point where you aren't properly equipped for it to work so it's a total fail..no matter how many times you attempt it

[Guest Zabrak]

I don't think I'll be much help here but you can try to get a mate, eat chocolate or work out more.

[Guest bronx]

Dude I know that in you past threads this sex thing has been an issue for you. You're young, a young man and your gonna think about it alot, till the point that it does become annoying. I know that you feel you need the right equipment to feel total and all and I'm with you an that, but shall I say You might have to release yourself and keep it moving. Just don't think about it in a phisical form but as you know it should be. Frustration is the worst especially when your in puberty and your a guy. Just a thought.

[Guest Sergei]

Yes, puberty is hard. Especially the second time around, I know what you're going through. I feel exactly the same, like it has become an obsession. Lucky for me I "ya know" and am comfortable doing that even with my body. Although to be honest with you I don't really find it helps all that much. Yes it makes the situation better for about 5 mins after, but then it's back to how it was. If I was you I just wouldn't worry about it. Most guys I have talked to say it passes.

[Guest My_Genesis]

Yes, puberty is hard. Especially the second time around, I know what you're going through. I feel exactly the same, like it has become an obsession. Lucky for me I "ya know" and am comfortable doing that even with my body. Although to be honest with you I don't really find it helps all that much. Yes it makes the situation better for about 5 mins after, but then it's back to how it was. If I was you I just wouldn't worry about it. Most guys I have talked to say it passes.

Yeah but bio guys actually get something out of it that's my point lol. like i can get all the peripheral "symptoms" but not the actual "result" the way you're supposed to

And if you're talking about T symptoms I'm not even on T. That plus the "irregularity" issue I've been having, plus craving salty/meaty foods a lot, plus being able to eat a lot and not gain any weight (this girl called me a "freak of nature"..long story short we were looking at how many calories are in Chipotle burritos lol), plus a bunch of other stuff is why I want to get my natural T levels tested

rofl @ the chocolate..isn't that like a girly thing?

see even today, I was gonna get a ginseng energy drink coffee thing and I changed my mind after I thought, "Caffeine and ginseng, very, very bad thing to put into your system for someone in my situation...don't do it..." lol.

[Guest Zabrak]

Part of the pleasure of eating chocolate is ascribed to the fact that its melting point is slightly below human body temperature; it melts in the mouth. Chocolate intake has been linked with release of serotonin in the brain, which is thought to produce feelings of pleasure.

Research has shown that heroin addicts tend to have an increased liking for chocolate; this may be because it triggers dopamine release in the brain's reinforcement systems – an effect, albeit a legal one, similar to that of opium. See also: chocoholic.

Male or female, people can feel the effect of eating chocolate. I will not limit myself to not enjoy it because I see myself as male.

So no, I wouldn't call it a 'girly thing.'

[Sally]

As with so many other things that are considered girly, eating chocolate is not in itself girly - it's how you show it's effects. A guy - showing no emotion, licks his fingers and says, "That was good, any more?", a girl - being allowed to show emotions sees the chocolate and begins to react just the same way that the male brain does, but actually says, "Oh, chocolate, goody , goody, goody!" The difference is in how you react.

Love ya,

Sally

[Guest Elizabeth K]

Ummmmm CHOCOLATE

GOOOOOOOOD

male or female - no difference

Liked it before HRT like it now

Ummmmm CHOCOLATE

And to the 'release" problem - hey you use whatever you happen to be at the time - you are still you in gender, the body is just a house you live in, and are remodelling. HA

Lizzy

[Guest Martin]

I know a girl who doesn't like chocolate, and I know many guys who do. I don't think chocolate, in and of itself, is a gendered thing. I know there are some people who try to make it a feminine thing, but I'm not going to let them dictate what kind of sweets I enjoy.

As for libido, I struggle with it too. I don't have the exact same problem - luckily, mine is fairly low. However, I don't really know what to do when the urges hit me. I can express them and sometimes that even feels good, but afterwards the dysphoria hits. I feel shameful and icky. I feel cheated because if I had the standard equipment, I would have a much easier time feeling pleasure and I wouldn't have the nasty aftereffects. At least, that's what I keep telling myself. I'm hoping surgery and pumping will eventually give me relatively standard equipment and that that will help, but there's no guarantee that I will get the physical effects I want, much less the psychological.

[Guest Evan_J]

.....much less the psychological.

This might not be an "enlightened" question on my part, but seeing as how we are all dysphoric (though admittedly everyone experiences it differently) and I feel really bad when I hear my brothers having such a bad time. When you guys do whatever you do -whether with someone or alone- do you mentally "see" yourself in a head to toe male-natal body? I do. And I'm wondering if that helps. Yes, it also requires being a little "careful" of what parts of you you come in contact with so you don't screw up the mental part but I guess I'm hoping it might help?

[Guest bronx]

I'm like Evan, I see what it's supposed to be and T has helped in that department. I really try not to think about it rather i enjoy the moment that i'm in. I guess i never really ever thought about it to much, I'm a man and that's that just not as endowed as I would want too be. Besides does size really matter, or is it what you can do with it?

[Guest StrandedOutThere]

This might not be an "enlightened" question on my part, but seeing as how we are all dysphoric (though admittedly everyone experiences it differently) and I feel really bad when I hear my brothers having such a bad time. When you guys do whatever you do -whether with someone or alone- do you mentally "see" yourself in a head to toe male-natal body? I do. And I'm wondering if that helps. Yes, it also requires being a little "careful" of what parts of you you come in contact with so you don't screw up the mental part but I guess I'm hoping it might help?

Yeah, I see myself in my mind as a natal male. As long as I am careful not to screw that up, I'm usually fine.

[Guest Jackson]

I see myself the same way - male. I guess this is one of those times that my not thinking that I was abnormal throughout my life has helped me. Although the equipment is not right, I am able to ignore it enough that I don't have any negative feelings. I'm not sure how to say this G-rated, but I'll try. Using a prosthesis helps make the experience more "right". I have a really good imagination so that's enough for me.

[Guest Huff]

Yeah, I see myself in my mind as a natal male. As long as I am careful not to screw that up, I'm usually fine.

me too.

Mike

[Guest leo]

when i you know, i always imagine myself as me... a guy that i am.

if i dont or im distracted for any reason i cant do it or the task becomes difficult

and i have a stupidly high libido and im not on T yet, mind some of the guys here think im lying about that

and yeh its really annoying i think im actually addicted as it can effect my day to day life lol

[Guest Christy.dancer]

OK, maybe I'm looking at this totally from the wrong perspective... and yeah, I'm REALLY new to coming to grips with my gender and sexuality issues.... but....

You're FTM, and in college, right? I mean, I live near Seattle, and meet a lot of non-trans lesbians who are just one fake five-o'clock-shadow away from passing as men. There is a "place" for them in the local lesbian/gay community, they're fully accepted, and don't have any issues what-so-ever in melding into society.

I'll add in passing that it DOESN'T seem to work in the opposite direction.... but that's a topic for another post, n'est pas?

Anyway.... why don't you just get involved with the local lesbian/gay community. I'm serious. There has GOT to be some cis-girl out there who, from all my observations, is probably turned on by a transitioning FTM and who would enjoy your company.

this, from the perspetive of a MTF total virgin who has a boyfriend and can't bring herself to go any further than making out with him....

[Guest Martin]

I have difficulties imagining myself to be better endowed than I actually am. Sometimes I do for the duration of the act, but afterwards the physical realty of my body spills over me, and I get depressed. I second guess my fantasies, wondering how realistic it is to find a partner who actually accepts me for who I am. Then the mental stains from being sexually assaulted come into play. It's a mess, really. I want to have a better relationship with my sexual self, but I'm not all too clear on how to go about achieving that. Maybe I can try to emphasis my maleness and see what happens.

[Guest My_Genesis]

This might not be an "enlightened" question on my part, but seeing as how we are all dysphoric (though admittedly everyone experiences it differently) and I feel really bad when I hear my brothers having such a bad time. When you guys do whatever you do -whether with someone or alone- do you mentally "see" yourself in a head to toe male-natal body? I do. And I'm wondering if that helps. Yes, it also requires being a little "careful" of what parts of you you come in contact with so you don't screw up the mental part but I guess I'm hoping it might help?

Yes I do all the time..I couldn't bring myself to even do it until I started thinking of myself as a guy. lol. It was just way too weird. And it's funny because I have a very graphic imagination but I guess I still realize it's all imagination and not reality and that messes me up. Think of it as, since it's obviously a brain-body conflict..well, that's exactly what the problem is. My brain wants the male version out of a not-male-version body.

My mind's being duped! lol.

There has GOT to be some cis-girl out there who, from all my observations, is probably turned on by a transitioning FTM and who would enjoy your company.

Well the reverse is certainly true ...

I wish it was that easy but the dysphoria thing kills that possibility for me. THIS is really the main reason I'm so desperate to be a fully physically functional male

this, from the perspetive of a MTF total virgin who has a boyfriend and can't bring herself to go any further than making out with him....

well at least you got that far...props to you for that..