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In A Perfect World


Sally

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In a Perfect World

By Sally Michelle Jackson

We all have dreamed of a ‘perfect world’

but what does that mean?

What may seem perfect to one

can be viewed as obscene.

I am forced to believe that perfection

like beauty it seems

lives in the eye of the beholder

evaluating like a director life’s scenes

Bald is beautiful to one

long hair for another

some keep to themselves while

some cling to each other

I have thought in the past that in a perfect world

all would be the right gender

we would be able to express ourselves openly

and our love would not be returned to sender

In a perfect world gender would not matter

just love and care regardless of the other’s

differences would be cherished and

the perfect world shared by all as by brothers

Don't bother trying to figure out any form. :D

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Well, I don't know what's going on here, but 19 people have read this and not one of you have bothered to say, "It Stinks!".

You can't be afraid of Sally, is it that you are afraid that if you critisize my poem I'll lock up the cookie jar?

Not a chance, I just wanted to attempt a poem and I would really like to know how good or bad it is.

Please be honest - not liking my poem is far from the worst thing that has ever happened to me.

Love ya,

Sally

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I'm no critic.and I don't have a badge to be a critic,,,,,,,,,badges we don't etc. Yes Sally another outstanding job from our short story writer in residence, now n to poet laureate or however you spell that word.......... Besides I did notice most people don't respond to poetry,,with the exception of Rain bird or Amanda L.R.

By the way neither of which answered my entry either...hint hint...... ;)B)

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Poetry is very "personal" to peeps when they read it. At least me. Usually I would say people have some kind of "emotional feeling" when they read it and (seeing as how this is an open forum) while we might tell ya a lot of things here, we might not tell you the feeling the poem "revealed". Its a difference between telling you "what happened" and even "what I'm thinking" as opposed to "what I"m feeling".

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Guest Kelly Ann

a small imperfect peck on the cheek for you Sally...and as further punishment one on the other side to make them match...is ze French way...zoot allures mon cherie...bon mott...Mlle K Annicon12.gif

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Poetry is very "personal" to peeps when they read it. At least me. Usually I would say people have some kind of "emotional feeling" when they read it and (seeing as how this is an open forum) while we might tell ya a lot of things here, we might not tell you the feeling the poem "revealed". Its a difference between telling you "what happened" and even "what I'm thinking" as opposed to "what I"m feeling".

As a writer I am insecure about how well my work is writen. I need to know if people like reading it and if they got a message. I know that each reader will have different emotions evoked by a work. That is like in a painting or a photograph, their life's experience effects how they feel about it - and whether they like it or not. But you can look a a painting that you hate and know that it is a good painting or one that isn't technically good that you like.

I just want to know if you like it (or not).

Begging for approval,

Sally :D

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Guest Elizabeth K

OMG you are pushYYYY :rolleyes: HA :P

Well - yes it is good. I didn't like the form change to two sets of longer stanzas at the end. And it needed a ZINGER to finish up - but I do feel it worked well in getting the idea across.

Poetry is hard to judge for me personally. Only the ones that grab me like they will never let go seem to get my attention. You are a musician, its like those songs that get into your head... you know... for better or not so better... but they get inside and never seem to leave - the drove my chevy to the levee - or - stabbed it with their steely knives... that stuff.

Poetry is exactly like fine artwork. I draw a hundred times before I find the one I want to keep - I destroy the others, sometimes - I do it in pencil and then over it in ink. If I am feeling brave I color - I cannot tell you how many times I have destroyed my perfectly good work with poor coloring - yikes - like writing and poetry - its a palatte - and you think you have a good one - and no one says anything? Awwww- so what - you should know instantly if it is truly good.

But its a fun thing thing to share and have someone say - hey, not bad! Do some more...

Baby - do some more!!! ;)

Loves you

Lizzy

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Guest JoshuaJennifer

My my Sally, when you said your poetry wasn't good, I thought you were serious! :P

Because this is such a pretty poem :)

I love it =D

Jennifer

x

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As a writer I am insecure about how well my work is writen. I need to know if people like reading it and if they got a message. I know that each reader will have different emotions evoked by a work. That is like in a painting or a photograph, their life's experience effects how they feel about it - and whether they like it or not. But you can look a a painting that you hate and know that it is a good painting or one that isn't technically good that you like.

I just want to know if you like it (or not).

Begging for approval,

Sally :D

:rolleyes: If we were kids I'd hang you on a coat hook. But "yes" I liked it lol. Now, can I have some food? lol

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:rolleyes: If we were kids I'd hang you on a coat hook. But "yes" I liked it lol. Now, can I have some food? lol

Thank you for that honest and heart felt critique.

What would you like Evan? I just Chicken Fried some Salami. :lol:

I never heard of baked ham - what's that?

Poems are to me so much harder to know what people think. I sometimes feel like it is with modern art - people are afraid to say they don't like it for fear of appearing foolish. This isn't the Emperor's New Clothes, you either like it or not and I can live with that.

I'm not really that needy - keep quiet Evan or Im giving the fried Twinkies to Kelly Ann.

Love ya,

Sally

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Guest Donna Jean

Ah ha!

I found you over here!

Hey, Sally...Very nice indeed! Lizzy is talking about "Stanzas and Zingers" I don't know what that is, but I do know that I like it very much!

Thank you, Sally it's really nice....

Donna Jean

(Stanzas and Zingers...wasn't that a band from the 60's?)

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Guest Emily.SoCal

I want to live in your perfect world, Sally. Nicely done piece. I felt it was very softly and delicately put together. That's how it read anyway.

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