Funny Story

[Guest KageBoy171]

Haha!

I was wondering if this has happened to any of you.

I am at my friend's house, right now. Her name is Sarah and she knows about me and all that jazz. She is actually sitting right next to me while I write this.

Well, she was going through her myspace messages earlier, just trying to recapture our past, haha. She found one of our ridiculous conversations and it said:

Me:

I want to dress up like a boy and go to school. Be friends with a few guys, see if I can pass, haha.

Sarah: Wow.

Me:

I just want to see if I could pass, you know? I think I would make a great guy.

This was all before I realized everything. You know, the big epiphany. So as we were reading it, I shouted "A HINT TO THE FUTURE!!"

Hahaha! "Now you have to believe me!!! XD" We both cracked up.

Have you guys ever done that? Where you look at the past and think "Holy crap, that was so obvious!"?

[Guest Zabrak]

I've always been obvious. No one was that shocked with me. lol

[Guest Cody_T]

Well you can look at whatever you want to say it was obvious. And of course, I'd say that all transpeople look back to the times it was obvious. But there are a million times it wasn't obvious, and for every time you say you're male or act stereotypically male there's a time you said you were female or acted stereotypically female. Not to make this negative or anything . I'm just getting a little sick of myself always going "oh, I was totally trans since day one" when I can't say that for sure because I don't remember enough. Those little incidents aren't enough to prove anything

but anyway, yes, I did... I spent a lot of time whining about not being a boyscout, told people I wished I was a boy, said I was going to marry a gay guy when I got older (not sure where that came from ) and when I was about nine, I got to do what I'd been dying to do for as long as I could remember... my brother finally agreed to let me borrow his clothes and go out in public dressed as a boy I've never forgotten what a good feeling that was. Except everyone I saw already knew me, so I didn't pass

[Guest KageBoy171]

Well you can look at whatever you want to say it was obvious. And of course, I'd say that all transpeople look back to the times it was obvious. But there are a million times it wasn't obvious, and for every time you say you're male or act stereotypically male there's a time you said you were female or acted stereotypically female. Not to make this negative or anything . I'm just getting a little sick of myself always going "oh, I was totally trans since day one" when I can't say that for sure because I don't remember enough. Those little incidents aren't enough to prove anything.

I know what you mean.

I don't remember enough to say that it was from the beginning, either. I hardly remember my childhood for some reason so I can't say that either, haha.

[Guest matthew41]

Thanks for sharing that story KageBoy,

That brought back memories of a story my mom told me one night at dinner about a year into my transition. At that point, she was just starting to preceive me as her son. Out of the blue, she had an epiphany and asked if I remembered the day I ran away from kindergarden and came home. I said I remembered waiting for the other kids to go inside after recess then dashing from tree to tree as I made my way home but not the reason why. She said that I anounced I quit school because my teacher had pulled me out of the boys line and made me stand in the girls line. I said my teacher was too dumb to know I was a boy. She smiled when she told me this. Then she looked sad and said that she had given me a gentle lecture on how I was wrong because I was a girl.

This was just the first of several stories that would follow as my mom realized the clues were there if the kind of information that is available for parents today, was available then.

Matt

[Guest leo]

about the not remembering thing i have the same problem, i am 18 and barely remember anything before i was 14

i duno why its odd, i remember random things but not sure itf its my own memory or what someone has told me

the story is cool though, but i do remember question a few ex about if i was a guy would u date me and such

[Guest Little Sara]

I know what you mean.

I don't remember enough to say that it was from the beginning, either. I hardly remember my childhood for some reason so I can't say that either, haha.

I remember ramming into a metal pole on a small mountain slope in a sled when I was 4, and waking up at the hospital.

I remember being asked to say an address that wasn't mine in kindergarten at 5.

I remember 'playing' on a Vic 20, but I don't know how old I was.

I remember examining my genitals in the bath tub and figuring someone had operated me against my will before making my parents adopt me, when I was 8.

I remember the name of certain neighbors who also bullied me (I lived there from 4 to 13).

I remember my 6th grade's teacher's name (I was 11).

I remember being told I was 'gifted' because of my grades (I was 11).

I remember having CPS called on my parents because school saw a mark at some point. (elementary, not sure when).

That's about it.

[Guest Jackson]

What surprised me more was a few months ago my dad mentioned to me that he remembered things that I'd done when I was growing up that should have been clues.

[Guest Little Sara]

What surprised me more was a few months ago my dad mentioned to me that he remembered things that I'd done when I was growing up that should have been clues.

My mom mentioned to my psychiatrist basically that I ran like a girl (since childhood), just last spring.

I was asking the shrink if it was possible I had Asperger Syndrome, and she asked if I had hand-flapping. My mom said I ran like a girl, and the shrink said that wasn't it. The shrink was clueless, dismissing AS because you don't have evident unvoluntary tics (for the record, I fit all necessary criterias for a diagnosis of AS), when it's only a possibility out of many. The DSM is like "Any 2 of the following 4...", and hand-flapping is only one.

[Guest Evan_J]

Thanks for sharing that story KageBoy,

That brought back memories of a story my mom told me one night at dinner about a year into my transition. At that point, she was just starting to preceive me as her son. Out of the blue, she had an epiphany and asked if I remembered the day I ran away from kindergarden and came home. I said I remembered waiting for the other kids to go inside after recess then dashing from tree to tree as I made my way home but not the reason why. She said that I anounced I quit school because my teacher had pulled me out of the boys line and made me stand in the girls line. I said my teacher was too dumb to know I was a boy. She smiled when she told me this. Then she looked sad and said that she had given me a gentle lecture on how I was wrong because I was a girl.

This was just the first of several stories that would follow as my mom realized the clues were there if the kind of information that is available for parents today, was available then.

Matt

Ok, I dunno why but that story got to me.

As for "memories" I can remember playing on my greatgrandmothers legs while she laid in bed and watched her soaps, I was 2.

[Guest CharlieRose]

I can't really think of any; I suppose it's because they all got warped. I didn't think the weird things I might have done were boyish, I just thought they were weird. Even that time I thought "I wish I had breast cancer so I had an excuse to cut these darn things off!" and then a second later was like, "That's not normal..." it took me a while to accept that I wasn't a girl who wanted all her secondary sexual characteristics gone, I wasn't a girl at all.

I was really nonconformist, even when I was like, ten, and really feminist, too. I have all sisters and a really really feminist dad, not an excess of really masculine male role models; I didn't even know how guys behaved. But, yeah, I was all "Girls can do this, too! Girls can do anything boys can do! I can do anything boys can do!" without realizing the rules didn't really apply.

(Funnily enough, it was my ultra feminist dad that originally had the hardest time grasping my desire to transition, and for the same reason I did. "What is it about being a boy that you want? What could it get you that you couldn't as a girl?" The whole, "Girls can do whatever boys can!" thing again. And I was like, "Uh... except be a boy?" I still don't think he's quite managed to get it just yet.)

[Guest KageBoy171]

I can't really think of any; I suppose it's because they all got warped. I didn't think the weird things I might have done were boyish, I just thought they were weird. Even that time I thought "I wish I had breast cancer so I had an excuse to cut these darn things off!" and then a second later was like, "That's not normal..." it took me a while to accept that I wasn't a girl who wanted all her secondary sexual characteristics gone, I wasn't a girl at all.

I was really nonconformist, even when I was like, ten, and really feminist, too. I have all sisters and a really really feminist dad, not an excess of really masculine male role models; I didn't even know how guys behaved. But, yeah, I was all "Girls can do this, too! Girls can do anything boys can do! I can do anything boys can do!" without realizing the rules didn't really apply.

(Funnily enough, it was my ultra feminist dad that originally had the hardest time grasping my desire to transition, and for the same reason I did. "What is it about being a boy that you want? What could it get you that you couldn't as a girl?" The whole, "Girls can do whatever boys can!" thing again. And I was like, "Uh... except be a boy?" I still don't think he's quite managed to get it just yet.)

AHHH! I did the same thing! I remember having a pang in my chest that really hurt, and being the hypochondriac that I sometimes can be, I immediately thought 'breast cancer!'. Then I asked my friend's mom, who is a nurse, and she just said it was that time of the month. Secretly, I was hoping that I would have cancer so they could cut them off and I'd be that much closer to being a boy. : ] haha. Then I thought "...wow...wishing a deadly disease on myself, how odd and a bit frightening."

Same here, I don't have any male role models in my house at all because my parents are divorced and I hardly see my dad at all. A house full of girls. ESTROGEN OCEAN! O_O

[Guest Evan_J]

ESTROGEN OCEAN! O_O

lol catchy

I "almost" got saved from one of those by the only male in our house, my grandpa. (God I loved him and thank you God) but he got "beat down" emotionally and verbally by the matriarchy anyhow and god did it suck when they decided I was too old to hang out with him like I originally had been, playing cards and building things and learning things outdoors. Somebody had the sick idea that we should be "separated" and I should spend more time indoors with grandma who was in her kitchen. I was never so entirely crushed. I didn't understand at first "why" (the whole supposed sex role thing) and thought he just didn't want me around him anymore (I didn't know he practically had got his throat jumped down) so I waited till he fell asleep in a chair and snuck up and "whomped" him lol. God that old man could run

[Guest KageBoy171]

lol catchy

I "almost" got saved from one of those by the only male in our house, my grandpa. (God I loved him and thank you God) but he got "beat down" emotionally and verbally by the matriarchy anyhow and god did it suck when they decided I was too old to hang out with him like I originally had been, playing cards and building things and learning things outdoors. Somebody had the sick idea that we should be "separated" and I should spend more time indoors with grandma who was in her kitchen. I was never so entirely crushed. I didn't understand at first "why" (the whole supposed sex role thing) and thought he just didn't want me around him anymore (I didn't know he practically had got his throat jumped down) so I waited till he fell asleep in a chair and snuck up and "whomped" him lol. God that old man could run

Haha. I understand what you mean. My grandpa practically taught me everything. We were outside all the time and taught my how to run the lawnmower when I was seven. And we did garden work in the sweltering heat, haha. Cherry tomatoes are the bomb!

[Guest amie]

It's funny that I should see this thread...

cause the whole passing thing has always kinda killed me...

killed me in a funny/cool kinda way that is.

Another Trannychic and I were just talkin' 'bout this just the other day.

I think I'm rather weathered on the whole passing thing in that I've always been concerned with passing.

For example, walking away from a group of guys, maybe even buddies of mine thinkin' to myself, "Wow, did I sound guy enough back there?"

So yeah, I foresee far less concern with the whole thing when I'm walkin' around in a bod more fitting to my personality.