Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Being One Of The Guys


Guest brandt

Recommended Posts

So I had a church class. And I only know a couple of people. And the rest just see me as a boy. So we had to be seperated into groups. I was actually seperated with one of my guy friends that knew about me and 6 other guys. So one of the guys was all like "it's an all men group". I was pretty happy and hoped that no one would ruin it for me. So we are all doing discussions and the other 6 guys have their own little thing and have their own insiders and me and my friends just sit there laughing at their stupidity. It was pretty funny though. What sucked though is that they were all singing and it required me to try and get down in a low tone voice but I couldn't because my voice wasn't low enough (I sound like a 12 year old boy going through pueberty, it's low just not low enough like bio guys). so practically I was just sitting there watching them. It was hilarious because we get this thing that says "someone puts arms around the other person" and we had to answer questions about this action. And we were all like "we are all men we don't do that". Then we do it while we are present our answers to the class. We sang out our answers to one of the temptation's song. One guy was singing it out and we all were just humming it in a circle. "bum bum ba da bum bum" haha.

So I felt out of place because I was just sitting there clueless to what they were talkin about, but then it was pretty cool because I got to hang out with the guys and see how they really act. I hang around mostly girls and their actions rub off on me. Guys I hang around occasionaly. I'm still trying to adjust to being a "guy" in their terms. I've observed that guys just say what's on their mind and I don't really do that. Guys practically try to be funny in anyway they can and be stupid. Sometimes I really don't get it but then again I actually do that too and yeah haha. Most guys, guys that I know, like to make jokes and make people laugh and be the center of the attention. They think of the most unusual things and stupid stuff as well.

So my experiences with hanging around bio guys were interesting. I got to get down to their level and be one of the "men". One of them always said "men" and I would just be happy because I was a MAN to them. Even though I looked like a 12 year old boy and had a "girl voice" as one of them told me haha. I was jealous of their low voices and I tried to go low. It sounded pretty funny haha, but yeah that was just a big milestone.

I've noticed that the guys I'm around practically just think I'm a cool dude and just like one of them and it just excites me. I can't wait til I go on T and just go out with the guys and do "guy" stuff.

Has anyone have experiences like that?

Link to comment

Grats, it looks like you're working through some stuff. Just remember - always look on the brigghttt sidee of life. :lol: Making jokes is a good way to lighten the mood and put a smile on your face. This is a good way for me - and perhaps you should try? - to feel better when I'm down. I go find something funny to laugh at. Like youtube vids/failblog or I go harass one of my bros and make them cheer me up.

Link to comment

I have an experiance similar to this with one of my male friends, he treats me just like all his guy friends, even when we're hanging out alone, or in a group. It's so nice since not only have I known him for fours years, but we also dated for quite a while.

I also get like that when I just pass when I'm out, so exciting. ^^ I get all full of adrenaline at first and stuff til I calm down.

I'm happy for you man, things seem to be going pretty well. =3

Link to comment

I'm happy for you bro, It brought back some memories I had when I first started to hang out in all male spaces, I guess i take it for granted sometimes forgetting that not to long ago I was where a lot of you younger guys are now.

The first time I was at a men's group, I was 30 and it was at this community center that I would volunteer at twice a week, anyhow they held a mens group every wek and i wouldn't go I would just sit outside until it was over, then one day one of the staff members asked me why i wasn't in the group (they all knew about me) and I was like i didn't want to envade anyones space, he said that I was a man and i belonged there, so I attended the next week and it was great. No one treated me any kind of way, I was one of the guys.

And yeah socializing with guys is way different than with girls. Guys seem to be more like whatever and stuff, where as girls think too much. I'm like that I'm just like whatever, and I always have been. Now I don't have to hide or justify it or anything else.

Happy for you again, it so cool to know your on your way.

Link to comment

BRANDT!

YOU'RE STILL KICKIN', BRAH!

That's awesome, man. I don't really hang out with alot of dudes either, even though i'd love it cuz girls got too much durned drama! Plus, I just feel awkward about being a boy, but not having alot of dude friends, seeing as how I'm like a bio guy: I say what I want, I talk about sex alot and all that other stuff.

But, still, that's rad.

Link to comment

haha thanks guys. its a really cool experience. i'm glad to be one of the guys and that pretty much i don't have to think too much when i hang around them. i've hung around girls too much that their actions pretty much rub off of me lol. i'm an emotional and sensitive guy when it comes to girls though. but yeah haha.

Link to comment
Guest My_Genesis

I'm a lot more comfortable around guys, I feel more like I can be myself and not think and worry so much about what I'm going to do or say. Because with girls the experience I've had is I'll say something that I think is completely okay to say, and for them it's really strange offensive, insert other negative adjective here lol. Or vice versa. But with guys I can just say stuff and they react the way I would expect them to.

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   4 Members, 0 Anonymous, 223 Guests (See full list)

    • MaryEllen
    • VickySGV
    • Abigail Genevieve
    • SamC
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.8k
    • Total Posts
      770k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,090
    • Most Online
      8,356

    Layla Marie hay
    Newest Member
    Layla Marie hay
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Britton
      Britton
      (53 years old)
    2. chipped_teeth
      chipped_teeth
    3. james-m
      james-m
    4. jenny75
      jenny75
      (34 years old)
    5. KASS13
      KASS13
  • Posts

    • KatieSC
      I wish I could cope as well as others. I feel very defeated in that all of the consideration, and then treatment to transition, could all be wiped out by this time next year with the united effort by the R party to eradicate all that is transgender. I fear that the national election could turn out to our detriment, and we will face a national push to eradicate us. Tracking us down will not be that hard to do. Once they know who we are, forcing the legislation to reverse our name changes, gender marker changes, and other records, will not be that hard. We saw an example when the AG in Texas was data mining the driver licenses for those who had gender marker changes. Who will we appeal to? The Supreme R Court? We would have an easier time trying to convince a Russian court.    We need to get out and vote in November. There is not enough Ben & Jerry's to improve my outlook on all of this. In some ways it is a cruel thing in a way. In the early 1930s, Germany was working hard to hunt down the LGBTQ population and eradicate it. Now Germany has better protections there than we have in many of our own states. About 90 years ago, Germany was seeing the rise of their very own dictator...Now the US is on the verge...Oh never mind. What a difference 90 years makes...    History may repeat itself, but sometimes it shifts the focus a little...
    • Nonexistent
      I have the same problem as you, my face is the main reason why I get misgendered I'm pretty sure. I think it's mostly up to genetics how your face will look (T can help, but still genetics will determine how you end up). You can't change your facial structure really, you can get facial masculinization surgery but it's expensive so not an option for most unless you're rich lol.    Experimentally (I haven't done it but want to), you could see if any plastic surgeons around you will give you Kybella in your cheeks. It is an injection that removes fat, and is usually used underneath the chin/on the neck below the jawline, but some may use it off-label on the face. The only potential problem with this is that if your face would naturally thin out at an older age, it could thin out extra and make you look older (though I'm not certain on this). Another option is to get filler in your jaw/chin, which would make your jawline look more square and your face more masculine. I want jaw filler but I'm poor lol, it only lasts one year up to a few years depending on what kind you get, so it would have to be done every so often and can get expensive. I did get chin filler once, only 2 small vials so it didn't make that big of a difference. I would recommend going for the jaw if you can only choose 1, I wish I had done that.   Those are the only options I know of that will bring legitimate noticeable changes.
    • April Marie
      Welcome to the forums, Blake!! We are happy that you found us!!
    • Mmindy
      Good evening Blake.   Welcome to Transgender Pulse Forums.   Best wishes, stay positive and motivated.   Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋
    • Nonexistent
      Thank you.    Trans men and trans women each have their own struggles for sure, but I agree, it can be a hard time to be a non-passing trans guy. There is no specific "man clothes" that only men wear. People could just think I'm butch (which sucks to think about, if people think I'm a lesbian when I'm a dude!!). I mean I would feel better if I got gendered correctly even if I don't fully pass, it would maybe raise my confidence to think maybe I do pass well lol! Instead I'm just reminded I don't.   Though I may just focus on the times I don't pass and ignore the times that I do. Because I rarely remember getting gendered correctly, but I hone in on the times that I don't. 
    • Nonexistent
      Thank you, I'm glad to be here. :)   I have been in therapy for 9 years but still can't seem to accept myself. I think it has to do with growing up trans in a world that hates us, especially in the south. I mean I was discriminated against by adults and ostracized as a kid/teen due to being trans. My family is accepting, but the rest of the world is not. I realize now a lot of people are accepting (even unexpectedly, like my partner's conservative republican Trump-loving parents lol), but it feels like my brain is still in survival mode every time I exit the door. I am a very fearful person.   My body still may change over time, but it feels like I haven't met the same 'quota' (don't know the right word) that a majority of other trans guys have on far less time on T. Most trans guys pass easily 1-3yrs on T, I'm double that and still don't pass well except my voice.
    • Nonexistent
      Thank you. I am just used to seeing trans guys who pass at like... 6 months to 1 year, at the most 3 years. And I just don't meet the mark, all the way at 6 years. It is possible with time I will masculinize more, but it's frustrating when I'm "behind" and may never catch up. It threatens my mental health mostly, possibly my physical health if I'm visibly trans (though I don't ever go out alone). 
    • Adrianna Danielle
      Boss is happy with everything with me and said I will be the only one that works on one customer's truck.This customer saw me clean a small grease spot in the inter of his Kenworh last week,on the steering wheel.A new customer too,saw me walk out with my tub o' towels wiping that grease stain off.This one,he cannot stand a grease spot in the interior.
    • Nonexistent
      Yeah, I am grieving the man I "should" have been. He will never exist, especially not in my youth. But I don't know how to healthily go about it instead of fixating on the life that could have been.
    • EasyE
    • VickySGV
      Going to the conventions has been one of my ways to deal with this stuff. 
    • Nonexistent
      Sorry it took me a while to respond!    I would like to get to know you. :) I only have mental disabilities. Schizoaffective disorder, depression, and anxiety. The last two are severe and very treatment-resistant. I did have physical problems for some time, but it was caused by an antipsychotic medication (Invega). It basically crippled me, muscle weakness/fatigue, basically could barely walk (used mobility devices) and doctors were useless since they didn't suspect the medication I was on! I've finally ditched antipsychotics (hopefully for good, unless my symptoms come back). I usually don't share like this, especially in person, but hey, I'm anonymous. :)   I'm not expecting reciprocation at all btw, these things are personal. There is more to us than disabilities, so tell me about yourself if you still wanna talk!
    • EasyE
      thanks for the insight ... good to know things are being well thought-out ... it is no easy topic for sure, as many of us on here have been wrestling with this stuff for years and decades...
    • Ashley0616
      @KymmieLWOW! He is absolutely horrible! Definitely one of the worst boss's. 
    • KymmieL
      Well the boss is at it again. They misplaced a work order thinking I was the last one who had it, yesterday morning. I know where it is. Last thing I did with it was put it back on the counter. He accused me a couple times of having it last and put it somewhere. Come to find out, the other boss (his wife) had taken it. she put the work order paper in the recycle box.   Has he apologized about the accusations. He!! no. I am waiting for hadies to get frost bit.   So that was my morning.  But it is finally warming up here. currently 63 and windy.   Hugs, Kymmie
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...