In Red I Wait

[Guest Jennifer T]

In the mirror

Un-recognition stares back

Puzzled, confused, searching

In red I wait

Beneath swelling clouds

Ominous, foreboding

She arrives

We ride

In familiar rhythmic silence

We glide

By field and wood

Fauna disturbed momentarily

Interstate

In streaks of red and blue

Corpulent silence

I am alone

Are you angry?

Aberrant, pensive

Issues parturient

As vultures to a kill..

No.

My only reply.

- Jennifer T, May 9, 2003

[Charlize]

I like the mood the poem produces and on some level i understand it but honestly i could not explain that meaning.

Interesting, thank you

Hugs,

Charlize

[Guest Jennifer T]

Thank you Charlize. I wrote that poem 5 months prior to coming out to my wife. It's actually a poem of duplicity, of sorts. I'd had an argument with my wife. We were meeting at a place we ride (bicycles) together. My car was red, my mood was red. As I waited for my wife, Jennifer was also arriving. In one sense it's historical while in another, allegorical. Both my wife and Jennifer met that day unawares. The issue, my 'heart' hung on the wind's current as vultures circling above. Streaks of red and blue, like the cars passing by on the interstate, so did the battle resound between T and Jennifer.

Both my wife and Jennifer queried my emotion. And again, I remained in denial, put Jennifer back in a box for a while longer.

The mood was red and solemn.

Five months later, I revealed my heart to my wife. And now five years later, Jennifer and T still ride alone; still meet on that trail and cry as the silence goes by.

Peace.

[Guest Brenda Hailey]

"In familiar rhythmic silence"

The place where longing flourishes

Where the ease of unknowing clashes with desire.

Safely distant with maintained closeness.

Secrets hidden in chain clatter cadence

The vultures rely on wind to.

[Guest Jennifer T]

Chain clatter cadence!!? Are you kidding me? Girl, I'm a primo bike mechanic. My chains are smooth and quiet..

;-)

Kidding. I liked the understanding in your words reflect.

Peace

[Charlize]

I am sorry that you ride that trail alone. Thank you for the explanation, but even without it, the words produce a mood that fits given the explanation you just provided. My wife and i rode a tandem for over 60,000 miles. Two or 3 times a week for years we rode and it was a wonderful time together. She has MS and i was finally unable to pick up the slack due to heart problems. I got an old BMW motorcycle and we rode that over the same roads for a bit but it just wasn't the same.

I miss those rides although when she was mad and smacking me on the back....don't miss that.

Thanks for bringing back those memories on a spring day when we would have been riding.

Hugs,

Charlize

[Guest Jennifer T]

Oh Charlize, my wife and I still ride together, though not as often as I might wish. And we enjoy each other's company. But the one place Jennifer finds her expression is on the bike, so when she rides, my wife does not. Does that make sense?

60k is a lot of cycling!!! I'm glad you two had all that together!! I am sorry that health issues took it, but the memories are for you to cherish.

Peace this day.

[Guest miss kindheart]

<<<< hug >>>>

For Jen

vanna