Hands !

[Guest So-kool]

Here is just my observations on one of the most obvious give aways.

I have what I consider Male hands but through trial and error have noticed things that i feel help to soften the look.

First and foremost -NO HAIR . You can sometimes get away with hair on forearms but Never on the knuckles and other parts of the hands

Second- skin confition. Get a nice pumice or grit of some sort. (Sugar and salt will also work)

And of course moisturize

Third- length it helpful to appear more thin especially at the fingers. Finger nails wirk wonders to extend the look of fingers.

Fourth- jewelry - if you have big fat knuckles and boney wrist with veins ? A couple well placed rings and bracelets or watch will divert attention to the shiney objects.

Fifth- posture- tucking your pinky slightly under your ring finger will help to thin the appearance of the palm use this especially when holding a cup or bottle. (Tape or use rubber band to attach your pinky to ring finger and this will help get the hang of it)

Do not spread your fingers wide try keep your fingers relaxed and partly spread.

Sixth- mannerizms- think of it as performing some sort of free-style hand puppet show! Lol

Not so much action like sign language and not limp wrist crazy hands either but gentle fluid motions while maintaining good hand posture. Also use gentle touch be mindful of this when opening doors and such. Take your time do not grab at stuff. Observe yourself in every motion and practice practice practice to get the look you want.

Gosh! And to think, this is only involving hands!

[Guest Kenna Dixon]

Very useful information. Thanks for posting it.

[Guest Jennifer T]

My hands have always been one of my more feminine traits.

[Charlize]

As a person who spent years working as a laborer on interstate highways and then as a carpenter for years my hands are a dead give away. The above hints are good. Thank You. I also must simply live with big hands and big arthritic knuckles. I try to remember some women i've known with big hands. My hands and feet are places my body will never match my desired form. It worried me at first but with time i've seen that most folks are just not very observant. They accept what they see and give me the benefit of any doubt they may have. I do try to not crush a guys hand when he shakes mine. Even with E working on the farm has given me some strength.

I would love soft hands but the path my life gave me took that away.

Hugs,

Charlize

[Guest So-kool]

Haha i'm right there with ya Charlize, i have been construction 25 years and still at it!!

Scars and wrinkles and arthritis! So I guess thats why I know so much about hands... I probably got the worst case of "bear paw" you ever saw! Lol. Can only do what you can do.

[Guest Jennifer T]

I've worked a lot with my hands over the years too. Just been blessed with small hands and a thin bone structure. I remember being a young child and listening to my older sister talk about how ugly guy hands could be. And it made me pay a lot of attention to how I treat my own.

[Guest Sarah Faith]

I can't say my hands have ever been something I've been self conscious about. I never gave them much thought pre-transition and even now I've been told by a friend with a cosmetology background that I have very feminine hands. These are some good tips, though I would say the mannerisms one is very conditional. Most women in my family even the extremely feminine ones are pretty tough girls and their hand mannerisms really aren't all that gentle. Maybe its a west coast thing but most of the girls I grew up around in Arizona/LA/Colorado lacked that really gentle fluid hand movements, even many of the girls here in Washington that I've met since moving out here for college either have very neutral or semi-direct hand mannerisms.

I definitely appreciate your tips, but like I said with mannerisms it's probably best for one to observe and pick up on what's more the norm with women in their area.

[Guest So-kool]

Oh my gosh. Yes Sara, I agree. Age and situation, subject matter and audience are big contributing factors for appropriate hand gestures.

I was just giving MY personal preference that I use as a guideline. I got a step mom who is Italian New Yorker!!!! Never saw any gentle sweeping motion from her! Lol

[Guest Brenda Hailey]

I am afraid there is little hope for my hands as they have been and still are in a constant battle.fat knuckles and bulging veins are their most prominent features. Decades of hard living working construction and cars has left them a scarred up mess.The increasing wrinkles, and general bone structure prevent them from ever being feminine by themselves.

At the current rate now I can paint my fingernails all pretty and within three days the nail job will be destroyed. the only alternative is to wear gloves and most of the time wearing them incumbers the work of holding small objects so no matter what what I do there is little relief. Short of changing jobs I am stuck with less than ideal hand care.

I like how they look when they are painted and that alone makes me happy enough to deal with having oversize man hands attached to my arms.

Brenda

[Guest Sarah Faith]

I am afraid there is little hope for my hands as they have been and still are in a constant battle.fat knuckles and bulging veins are their most prominent features. Decades of hard living working construction and cars has left them a scarred up mess.The increasing wrinkles, and general bone structure prevent them from ever being feminine by themselves.

At the current rate now I can paint my fingernails all pretty and within three days the nail job will be destroyed. the only alternative is to wear gloves and most of the time wearing them incumbers the work of holding small objects so no matter what what I do there is little relief. Short of changing jobs I am stuck with less than ideal hand care.

I like how they look when they are painted and that alone makes me happy enough to deal with having oversize man hands attached to my arms.

Brenda

Depends on the nail polish you are using. If you are using the standard apply and dry nail polish it begins chipping within a matter of days for anyone really. The stuff they use at salons lasts MUCH longer, its called Gel nail polish you can find some for do it your self at pretty much any major store like Walmart,Walgreens, or target. Gel Nail polish lasts about 2 weeks or so before it starts to chip and peel. It does however require more effort to put on, and as a result requires a little bit of investment, as you have to use a LED lamp for it to cure which are usually sold in the same area as the gel polish. It also requires a nail prep, base coat, often 2 color coats, and then a top coat, and each layer needs to be cured with the lamp. Removal can also be more time consuming, its well worth it though if you want nails that last longer than 2-3 days. I use gel more often than anything else at this point.

[Guest Brenda Hailey]

I am afraid there is little hope for my hands as they have been and still are in a constant battle.fat knuckles and bulging veins are their most prominent features. Decades of hard living working construction and cars has left them a scarred up mess.The increasing wrinkles, and general bone structure prevent them from ever being feminine by themselves.

At the current rate now I can paint my fingernails all pretty and within three days the nail job will be destroyed. the only alternative is to wear gloves and most of the time wearing them incumbers the work of holding small objects so no matter what what I do there is little relief. Short of changing jobs I am stuck with less than ideal hand care.

I like how they look when they are painted and that alone makes me happy enough to deal with having oversize man hands attached to my arms.

Brenda

Depends on the nail polish you are using. If you are using the standard apply and dry nail polish it begins chipping within a matter of days for anyone really. The stuff they use at salons lasts MUCH longer, its called Gel nail polish you can find some for do it your self at pretty much any major store like Walmart,Walgreens, or target. Gel Nail polish lasts about 2 weeks or so before it starts to chip and peel. It does however require more effort to put on, and as a result requires a little bit of investment, as you have to use a LED lamp for it to cure which are usually sold in the same area as the gel polish. It also requires a nail prep, base coat, often 2 color coats, and then a top coat, and each layer needs to be cured with the lamp. Removal can also be more time consuming, its well worth it though if you want nails that last longer than 2-3 days. I use gel more often than anything else at this point.

Thanks for the tips Sarah,the more I think about it the more it makes sense.

I can liken it to automotive paint finishes which also come in many different grades of paint and cures.

I just had not fully realized I was putting on a Maaco or Earl Scheib paint job before now.

It has only been recently that I have started doing my nails so I am still pretty new at it.

I will look into some better products and experiment a little more.

Thank you.

[Guest Melissa~]

Soft small hands are definitely nice. It's been five years since I have had any construction duties at my job, now the hardest thing on them is lab work. It shows, I have gotten doctors compliments on them. I tend to trim my nails, moisturize, and I use polish often.. I have a permanently split nail, as well as splinter hemorrhages(usually hidden under paint.) Works for me, and I hope to refrain from returning to field duty jobs.

[Charlize]

I also wear gloves at all times now when i need them. Between that and a moisturizer things are getting softer but i can't let them get too soft as i'm still working the farm. I guess it if i'm going to move hay i'll have to keep being a farm girl( read tomboy). That's me. I'm not the only hard working woman around and as one i can't complain.

Hugs,

Charlize

[Guest Lizzie McTrucker]

Yep! I learned by watching other women and seeing how they hold things and how they pick up things and how they hold their hands and how they do that finger curl thing that looks really dainty (that was high on my list of things to adopt for myself to do). I have acrylic nails and I think that helps in the whole hand package, combined with the mannerisms and such. I do also wear a few rings and a bracelet. (so much so that my thumb rings have now produced a little band of pale skin on each thumb where they normally rest)

[VickySGV]

Not yet mentioned that I have seen, is the choice of tops you wear. Tight long sleeves emphasize the hand size, where loose cuff sleeves can draw attention away from them.

[tracy_j]

Thank you

It's good to see a fairly complete set of observations.

One think I am thinking at the moment when going out bare armed in the summer is that with many years in the past riding a bike without gloves the backs of my hands are very much darker than the white skin of my body which is normally covered. As I look now though after the last few days the colours are matching a little as it is really sunny here but I prefer to stay white and have to be careful as I burn easily. My worst place for burning is the tops of my feet so beach exposure has to be limited but I love going in the sea .

My hands are perhaps a cross between male and female so are not too bad and I do shave. As a side note - the most painful place I have used an epilator is on the backs of my hands! Real pain!!!

Tracy

[Guest Isabel1991]

As a person who spent years working as a laborer on interstate highways and then as a carpenter for years my hands are a dead give away. The above hints are good. Thank You. I also must simply live with big hands and big arthritic knuckles. I try to remember some women i've known with big hands. My hands and feet are places my body will never match my desired form. It worried me at first but with time i've seen that most folks are just not very observant. They accept what they see and give me the benefit of any doubt they may have. I do try to not crush a guys hand when he shakes mine. Even with E working on the farm has given me some strength.

I would love soft hands but the path my life gave me took that away.

Hugs,

Charlize

Omg I can totally relate Ive been doing manual labor for a decade so like since I was 12 or 13 and even now I do labor and one it's so hard to keep them manicured right and two there just get ruff but I maintain alright though right now pre transition my nails and hands are one of the first things I'm working on with clear nailpolish small steps and a bit of foundation and concealer

Love Isabel<3

[Guest LizMarie]

I was always told I had big hands. But since so many of my cisgender female friends are as tall or taller than me, I began comparing hand sizes with them. My hands are actually pretty average for a 5 foot 10 inch woman. So I've stopped worrying about it.

I will note that a bracelet, rings, and other jewelry do an excellent job of distracting people away from hand size anyway so those are always options to wear to further feminize your appearance.

[Guest Zeda]

Oh my gosh, my hands are huge. Then again, I am huge. The biggest issue isn't the length. The length is .75 inch longer than what it should be for a woman of my height, but the width is really excessive, even for males.

[tracy_j]

Going back to the original post and 'no hair' has reminded me that I needed to repair (if possible) my original epilator as the replacement I got was a bit cheap and nasty. I remembered that I had no issues with ingrowing hairs on the backs of my hands so could use an epilator on them!

I managed to fix it (serviced the motor) and on sorting the hairs on my hands I was soon reminded just how painful that was . It works well though so I will keep it up! It is more effective than shaving.

Tracy

[Guest Faith gibson]

Hi,

I wish I'd have read this post earlier. Someone took a picture of me this past weekend while I was holding an umbrella. I don't do construction work and have soft hands I guess by male standards, but I was so upset by how big my hands looked in the photo. I have long nails on my guitar picking hand so it looks OK but I have to keep the nails short on the hand that I use on the fret board. It really stands out. Thanks for the tips though.

Faith

[Guest So-kool]

I had laser hair removal on my hands and i must say, " it's been wonderful!" My lazer tech did not even charge any extra for it while i was getting my face done. Keep that in mind if you are still doing hair removal. I dont feel like every single hair needs to be gone but the thick, dark ones can not stay!

[Guest Sarah Faith]

If you are on HRT that would have over time thinned out your hairs on your arms and hands. I thought about doing laser on my arms and chest and all of that early on, but I ultimately decided to wait and see and after a few years I don't have any visible hair left on my hands. It's awesome that you got the hands done for free basically, Im just curious as to how long you waited to see if HRT would make much change?

[Guest cerise]

I like the tips and so much is the launguage the body part speaks.

3rd week of growing nails and been shaving the fingers and back hand area for years.

Tried pulling out the hairs individually with tweezers as an experiment but they grew back.

I bought 5 pound weights to slim the arms but prooved myself to be too lazy so I still wear and buy only long sleeve shirts.

Maybe rowing or sumpin where I am going somewhere as mindless repitition is not my forte.

[JJ]

There was a very famous movie star dancer who though male had such huge hands he was embarrassed and felt it seriously interfered with his look in dancing etc so he trained himself to carry his hands folded in some with his thumb tucked slightly. He did it all the time until it became an ingrained habit and part of his body language. His name was Fred Astaire and if you Google pics or watch old movies you can see it when you know to look though it isn't noticeable otherwise.

I am coming from the other direction and though my hands have always been to square and slightly large for a woman they just didn't look right for a man in pics. Then I realized how differently men and women hold their hands. Women keep their fingers closed and their hands as small as they can make them while men keep their hands more flat and opened. I think it's just part of that whole proven body language thing that men take up as much space as possible while women take up as little. Right down to how you hold your hands.

It won't help very much to have soft pretty hands if you are saying man loud and clear by the way you hold and use them. Some women have bigger hands and are never questioned because of them while some men have smaller of more delicate hands that no one questions because their body language with them still says clearly woman or man

Johnny