Jump to content

  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Feeling uncomfortable at my church's VBS(Vacation Bible School)

Guest Motormouth18

By Guest Motormouth18,
in Christianity

Recommended Posts

Guest Motormouth18

Guest Motormouth18

Posted
Posted

This year for VBS, my church has joined together with another small southern baptist church in my area. We're doing everything at this other church. I feel extremely uncomfortable there. Everyone from my church know that I'm trans, so to them the way I dress and act is normal for Kim(me). They think nothing of it. At this church, though, I got looks. They're not used to a young man looking person being introduced as a she(for now). I got placed with 2 older(60+) ladies to help with the 11/12 year olds.. I could tell that even though they were nice to me,they weren't too comfortable around me. I kept my distance and spent as much time as I could with my church members that know me. I'm an extreme introvert, so that didn't help. I don't carry on conversations with people that I don't know more than need be. Hopefully, tomorrow I'll be in charge of the sports area, so I won't have to much talking or helping. I know that trying to explain what I am would be pointless. The adults would either think that I'm crazy or not know I'm talking about.

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator
Charlize Rhodium Member

Charlize

Posted
  • Forum Moderator
Posted

I'm sorry you are dealing with the lack of understanding but also glad that you are going out into the world and being of service to others. That is the best way to show others that you are the wonderful person you are. You will quietly win them over in time

Hugs,

Charlize

Link to comment
Guest Cyd

Guest Cyd

Posted
Posted

I agree with Charlize. I think you are AWESOME to be out as trans at your church, and I think your churchfolks are awesome for accepting you. I know acceptance isn't always the case with southern baptist churches.

Remember that the folks who seem uncomfortable are the ones with the problem, not you. Just be yourself. You sound pretty great to me. :)

Link to comment
Guest Motormouth18

Guest Motormouth18

Posted
Posted

I wish that I felt more comfortable and didn't let stuff like this affect me like it does. The looks made me feel "wrong" for expressing who I am. I was dressed appropriately for a young man, a young men's polo and pass-the-knee shorts, so if I hadn't introduced as a she(I don't require people to call me he, very few people do), I would've been fine.

Link to comment
  • Admin
VickySGV Rhodium Member

VickySGV

Posted
  • Admin
Posted

There is another dynamic going on it there Kim, the big point is their age, and the fact you are a stranger to them. The gender issue is there, but the have an "inside club" there, and any of your fellow congregants will get the same treatment.

Link to comment
Guest Motormouth18

Guest Motormouth18

Posted
Posted

Vicki, none of my fellow church members got the "treatment", I guess, as I did. They all fit right in. My youth pastor was cracking jokes at the "dumb blonde" in charge of the whole event. I felt like a complete unwelcomed outsider.

Link to comment
Guest Cyd

Guest Cyd

Posted
Posted

Gosh, I'm so sorry, Kim. I hope you can find strength in your inner being, and know that in the grand scheme of things, these narrow-sighted folks don't matter at all. God loves you--the REAL you, absolutely and totally. And folks who are able to truly see you and accept you are the ones to keep hold of and treasure. Those who can't...well, just keep being your awesome self. If they catch up with reality and learn to open their eyes and hearts, great; if not, stay focused on those who affirm you and let the rest fall away.

I know it's hard sometimes. Sending a big hug your way!

Link to comment
  • Admin
VickySGV Rhodium Member

VickySGV

Posted
  • Admin
Posted

Kim, I am legitimately sorry they made you feel that way. I am probably spoiled in the fact that my parish church, and my regional and national Church do show me love and acceptance for who and what I am. I wish I could do more for you than just sending a cyber hug, but as I mentioned in another post I made here, I know that Jesus and God are happy and accepting of us as we are, and are proud to have us in their family!! Keep that thought in mind always.

Link to comment
Guest Motormouth18

Guest Motormouth18

Posted
Posted

Well, today went alot better. I was in charge of the playground. The little kids thought nothing of how I was dressed(v-neck t shirt and shorts). All of the adults who were there with the kids where either from my church or know me really well. Plus, they let go with my church youth leader for his class instead of with the young kids. I feel so much more comfortable around him as I know from a couple of long conversations that he gets that this is real and that I feels for me and he can't imagine the daily struggle I go through.

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
Go to topic listing

  • Who's Online   5 Members, 0 Anonymous, 132 Guests (See full list)

    • Maddee
    • VickySGV
    • RaineOnYourParade
    • AllieJ
    • Susie

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.

  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.7k
    • Total Posts
      768.6k

  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,031
    • Most Online
      8,356
    jacobb
    Newest Member
    jacobb
    Joined

  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Adele Svetova
      Adele Svetova
      (25 years old)
    2. BROOKSGLASS
      BROOKSGLASS
      (34 years old)
    3. FinnyFinsterHH
      FinnyFinsterHH
      (16 years old)
    4. fool4luv
      fool4luv
      (26 years old)
    5. itsaddison
      itsaddison
      (20 years old)
    View all

  • Posts

    • Abigail Genevieve
      Project 2025

      By Abigail Genevieve · Posted

      In the forward I learn that transgenderism is bad, and somewhere else that transgender ideology is bad.  I have not yet read a definition of either in the document.  I assume they are the same.  I know Focus on a Family has a definition of transgenderism on their website, or did, but I am not sure this is the same as that.  I might agree that transgenderism is bad if they use a definition I condemn (e.g. transgenderism means you always pour ketchup in your shoes before you put them on - I could not agree to that).  Is someone who believes in transgenderism, whatever it is, a transgenderist? I never see that term.  There may be other definitions out there, but I don't think there is an Official Definition that we all agree to.
    • RaineOnYourParade
      OK Governor Signs School Bathroom Bill Into Law

      By RaineOnYourParade · Posted

      Crazy fact, was gonna go to the school where this went down at before I moved, have a lot of friends there. I know at least one of my friends met the guy on one occasion, not knowing who it was.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      OK Governor Signs School Bathroom Bill Into Law

      By Abigail Genevieve · Posted

      They are thinking of Loudon.  The problem there was the girls were not protected from a known predator, who was moved from one school to another instead being effectively disciplined.  Outlaw school administrators? <sarc>
    • Abigail Genevieve
      OK Governor Signs School Bathroom Bill Into Law

      By Abigail Genevieve · Posted

      How ironic.  I agree with the governor "“You cannot change your gender; you cannot pick your gender…there is a confused group of people that somehow think you can,”    - we are what we are, we are fighting the fact we CANNOT change our gender, which we did not pick.  Many if not all of us would not have picked a trans condition and have sought to evade, deny or move out or resolve it anyway we can.  Those who are confused on this issue are not trans folk.  They want us to change our gender but they deny we can.  Confusion.  
    • Vidanjali
      Acceptance

      By Vidanjali · Posted

      @FinnyFinsterHH no one can satisfy your questions about what will the future hold. But I can advise you to slow your mind down as much as you're able. Take it slow and one moment at a time. This advice goes beyond the practical reality that that's truly all you can do - further, try to enjoy each moment. It's clear you have a lot of aspirations regarding transition. But it's best to try to accept the bounds of your life circumstances at present because if you develop worries or even resentments about them, that will only make you bitter and more anxious. Instead, try to focus on anything you find affirming. Practice positive self-talk and give yourself affirmations too. Try to let go of expectations of your family members - they can only deal with change to the capacity they're able due to their own life conditions. Allow them grace as you wish they would allow you. Practice patience.   Try this exercise - read through your post and make one list of the positive developments and another of things you cannot control (including the future). If you have a sense of spirituality, offer the second list as a sacrifice to however you understand a higher power - leave it in their hands. If you're not spiritual, then offer it up to hope. Then throw that list away. Keep the list of positives and leave some room on it because guaranteed you'll have more and more to add. Look forward to that, but don't let your mind think it can rush things. Try to enjoy the ride. 
    • Vidanjali
      Starting T today!!!

      By Vidanjali · Posted

      Happy birthday, Sam! Lotsa love!
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Project 2025

      By Abigail Genevieve · Posted

      I still have not read much of this.  Very little of this document pertains to trans folk.  Some of the statements are more than problematic concerning trans folk.   It certainly was not written just to get us.   " those with gender dysphoria should be expelled from military service."  and "Reverse policies that allow transgender individuals to serve in the military. Gender dysphoria is incompatible with the demands of military service,"  https://static.project2025.org/2025_MandateForLeadership_CHAPTER-04.pdf are two lines out of hundreds if not thousands regarding the Department of Defense, targeting trans folk in an almost off-hand manner.    So if a fighter pilot, say, or a ship's captain, highly experienced and trained at enormous expense, is determined to be transgender (method unknown) the US loses someone badly needed due to the personnel shortage who is ready, willing and able to perform their duties.  Many trans folk have served well and transitioned later.  I don't think this point is well thought out.    A number of policy recommendations I would disagree with.  I am not sure there is a method to discuss those with the authors; I am attempting to find out.  I have good conservative creds.    They are fully intending to implement this, regardless of who the president is, as long as that president is conservative. It is not Trump centered.  I don't think he had anything to do with it. 
    • April Marie
      What are you wearing today?

      By April Marie · Posted

      I wear a Delimira Mastectomy sleep bra with Vollence sleep rated breast forms. The form fit inside pockets so they don't touch your skin. I bought the bras on Amazon and found the forms on eBay. They were much less expensive than buying through the other sources. 
    • Ashley0616
      What are you wearing today?

      By Ashley0616 · Posted

      I wore an olive corduroy coverall dress with a navy blue shirt underneath. 
    • Ashley0616
      Starting T today!!!

      By Ashley0616 · Posted

      @LittleSamCongratulations on one of the biggest decisions. Looking forward to your progress. 
    • Ivy
      What are you wearing today?

      By Ivy · Posted

      I don't wear a bra to bed.  The girls aren't big enough to need it, but still enough to appreciate.  Just a flannel nightgown suits me fine.
    • Ashley0616
      Acceptance

      By Ashley0616 · Posted

      You're welcome. I'm here quite often if you need me. 
    • Ashley0616
      Good morning All. Coffees on.

      By Ashley0616 · Posted

      Very nice!
    • Ivy
      OK Governor Signs School Bathroom Bill Into Law

      By Ivy · Posted

      Yeah, that is the point.  And of course they can be proud of themselves for saving humanity.   Yeah.  That would be scary.  I'd find a bush somewhere like our GOP governor candidate recommends.  So far I've gotten away with the women's.  I've been told I pass better than I realize.  But it would only take one a55h0le.   This is all so stupid.  I mean, who gets off on hanging out in a bathroom?
    • Ashley0616
      Good morning All. Coffees on.

      By Ashley0616 · Posted

      Oh yes. It was not fun cleaning it up but he is better.

  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...