answers

[MaryEllen]

She knows that somethings wrong but she's in denial that you have feelings of being transgender. It's evidently more than she can comprehend at the moment. She's your legal guardian so you have to go along with what she says. About all I can say is, don't give up. If the opportunity should come up, state your thoughts but don't press the issue. In time she may come to accept that you're transgender or she may not. Only time will tell.

Again, counseling with a trained gender therapist would be very beneficial for you. You could try asking her if she would be willing to let you do this.

You're only 14 and I know 4 years will seem like an eternity but once you reach 18, you'll be free to make your own decisions.

[Guest Whitewolf011]

I have a counselor I speak to would it be wise to speak to him on how I feel?

[MaryEllen]

Is this counselor a person that you can trust? If yes, I would say it wouldn't hurt. You could say that you are asking on behalf of a friend who has feelings of being transgender as a start. That way if it didn't turn out well, you wouldn't have outed yourself. Hopefully, he can help you.

[Guest Whitewolf011]

Any perosnal thougths u wish to add u been a big help an I thank you

[Guest Whitewolf011]

Thoughts*

[MaryEllen]

Only that you shouldn't give up. If you're absolutely sure you're transgender and a gender therapist confirms it, you'll have a good start. It's absolutely imperative that you get counseling, preferably from a gender therapist. Just hope and pray that your mom goes along with it.

[Guest LizMarie]

Mary Ellen has given you absolutely wonderful advice. I have little to add except just be safe. If there is any chance you could be thrown out of your own home, don't risk it. As Mary Ellen said, four years will pass very quickly and you can always talk to those of us here for support.

As for your therapist, if you trust your therapist, you should tell them everything you can. They don't read minds and they can only give us as much help as we allow by revealing ourselves to them.

Good luck!

[Guest Whitewolf011]

Thank you all for the help you have provided I hope to be free and start a fresh new life I well see what I can do with my therapist. Again thank you soooo much all of you

[MaryEllen]

You're welcome.

[Guest Whitewolf011]

I made a big discovery so when I was little I did something to make my dad angry and he said stop acting like a girl or something like that I must have been very sacred cause I changed how I act and stoped showing of that behavior and in the process forget who I was it was a memory that came to me after reading more of GID. I must have been very little but it came to me and it makes sense cause after adding the pieces all up it makes sense.

[Guest Whitewolf011]

I believe I was acting like a girl and that's what Set dad off

[MaryEllen]

That's very likely what happened.

MaryEllen

[Charlize]

I know i put everything aside because of the way my parents reacted. Many of us have down that. For me it was a time when there was no understanding of trans issues. Please do get the help you can get. Times have fortunately changed. Your councilor may be able to help. If nothing else perhaps they will realize and assist in getting other therapy. At your age it is best to try and be part of a family but perhaps with some outside help your family can also support you and your gender issues. Please know that you not alone and caring folks are to help as we can. I'm sure you have seen that already.

Hugs,

Charlize

[Guest Whitewolf011]

Thank you for the great advice and support charlize I never forget the words of helpful people like you ever. I believe after all thoose years in fear and followin what my dad wanted to be I lost my true self and im trying to find ways of getting it back I hope I can find out what my true personality is and hopefully retain it.

[Guest LizMarie]

For me that realization came when I was about 5 years old. I might have been 4 or 6, I don't remember. My grandmother always took me with her shopping each week when she went to get her hair done. There was some amusement among the hairdressers and other women that a little boy would be so well behaved at the salon but it all went over my head (I think). But one day after getting her hair done, we were shopping in a local department store, LS Good and Company, a store that my grandmother herself had worked at when she was younger, during the Great Depression. As we passed through the store, I remember stopping my grandmother and telling her I wanted "that dress". The look of sheer horror and her reaction are something that I can recall now. I repressed this and many other memories from when I was growing up and lots of them have come back while working through therapy over the last few years.

I wish the world had been more accepting back in the 1960s and 1970s. I know that waiting til you are 18 seems a long ways away, but looking back, I would have been ecstatic if I could have transitioned at the age of 18.

[Guest Whitewolf011]

My memory is faded but I asked for a barbie when I was with my dad when I was very little he got mad and yelled at me to put it back and stop acting like a girl. Since then I been afraid to express myself and I used a false personality so it seemed like I was normal and my dad was happy and I grew up like that and one never noticed I had GID even I forgot but it was never gone signs of it proved it was around still so it wasn't all gone.I am rediscovering my own self it's going be hard cause I have not many I trust these days to express it but the overall feel of my real self is just so cheerful, happy, and very hype. I been thinking of ways to reconnect to my true self and ditch the false personality I been using all these years. One of the biggest ideas I have to reconnect is try to express how I feel and explain everything to my other counselor in va and ik people said wait till im 18 but I think it be best if I try to start around know cause i feel maybe im nervous to express my true personality cause I don't think people would see it normal for a guy to have a cheerful girl personality so im guessing if I do the transition to female i may feel more comfortable to express it. Overall I hope it all works out in the long run but I really want to reconnect to my true self and be me for once and not be what my dad wants me to be besides its my life. But anyway I thank you all again I am so thankful for the help everyone has done with out you girls I never would of know who I was all this time and be clueless I well never forget the help you have provided thank you soooooooooooooo much.

[MaryEllen]

You're welcome. I truly hope that you can get to live your life as your true self.

MaryEllen

[Guest Whitewolf011]

Status update. Turns out I been acting as a different person Casue I was afraid to be me and I found this out a couple weeks ago and im trying to be me but it turns out the true me is female meaning it thinks like a girl, thoughts, and feelings. I been trying to be me buts it been very hard and it's like my true self is trapped in a jail thats hard to escape. I believe when I was acting as a different person it supressed everything and im so also when I look at girls my mind just flips out sometimes it's a very overwhelming feeling and idk what it means if anyone has any info on what this is then feel free to tell me thanks.

[Guest Whitewolf011]

Also I hope for advice on what to do cause idk i feel so lost and confused

[Guest shruti]

I am new here and i am trying hard to interact to my similar people but failed over all site is very informative but here we can not meet other like minded same people for interaction.

[Carolyn Marie]

Shruti, if you are looking for other cross dressers to talk with, there are two weekly moderated Chat sessions just for CDers. You can find the schedule here:

http://www.lauras-playground.com/support_meetings.htm

You need a PC or laptop with a recent version of Java to join Chat, and you should register for it in advance. It is a separate registration from the forums, and Chat has somewhat different rules.

HUGS

Carolyn Marie