Depictions of crossdressers.

[Guest Asile23]

All my life in popular culture I have almost (actually never) never seen a positive depiction of a Cross-dresser.

They all seem to fall into three tropes; they are either A: Liers (dressing to deceive others). B: Monsters: killers, baddies, psychos or C: the butt of the Joke (dressing as joke). I feel that this has had a negative impact on me and others as it spreads false assumptions of who we are.

I would love to hear about positive depictions of Cross-dressers in pop culture and feel free to add to my list of tropes you see that lead to negative views on Cross-dressers.

BTW when I talk about negative depictions I'm looking at why the character dresses and how the producers (writers, directors etc) depict the character. Are they fully rounded character, are they only dressing to elicit a laugh or fear out of the audience.

I'd love to see some positive cross-dressers in popular culture as i struggle with this.

[Guest KatyDesire]

Hear! Hear!

It drives me nuts.

My GT mentioned that there is a series coming out about 6 CDs, or maybe transpeople, which is sympathetically handled. We will see.....

I actually avoid shows which I know will depict CDs, because it just annoys me. I do get the feeling, though, that there is more empathy arising. I hope so. We'll see...

[Guest otter-girl]

Mrs Browns Boys is a perfect example of this. I absolutely despise this type of movie because regardless of any humour, the vehicle for it is a trope-meme which is demeaning to non-cisgender.

Hugs

Rachel

[Guest Kenna Dixon]

Look for the 1992 film "Just Like A Woman", with Adrian Pasdar and Julie Walters.

It's essentially a comedy but with a very sensitive portrayal of a crossdresser and the woman who comes to understand and support him and his friends.

Here's a link to watch it on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g9N6fG7OtWE

[Guest Pinocchio]

Fx's Amber dresses like a boy. (Kpop group) a.k.a south-korean pop band, she's really awesome and really popular. She is often confused for a guy but I think she's just a tomboy. Still, she's a great inspiration dressing and acting however she wants and people really like her. You should totally check her out!

[Charlize]

While it is a bit of a comedy i certainly enjoyed the movie "Tootsie". She looks great and begins to truly enjoy dressing. My favorite line is right at the end when she is back to being him' is walking with his lover. He offerers her his yellow dress but says he wants it back so he can wear it as well. I could certainly relate.

Hugs,

Charlize

[Guest Elyssia]

Sadly this seems to be a trend that is mirrored in the uk ,I don't really see anything about cd/trans that isn't portrayed to be kind of seedy or deviant.

I share your feelings about mrs browns boys ,I tried to watch it ,lasted about a min and had to turn it off.

[Guest AshleighP]

Interesting topic. I cringe every time I'm watching something and the subject of cross dressing comes into the story line. It usually evokes a "see I told you it's weird" look from my wife who does not at all understand or support me in this.

I have seen one episode of one show where we were depicted in an accepting, normal, manner (eventually). It is a British show called "William and Mary". There is an episode where a woman's husband dies and she finds out about his lifelong cross dressing. Long story short, after she gets over her anger, she invites his support group to attend the funeral dressed however they are comfortable. Worth watching I think, if you can find it. I believe it is season 2, episode 5.

[Guest Rose]

The movie/Broadway musical Kninky Boots has a crossdresser character who is mostly portrayed in a positive way and is a lead role. The character even saves the main charecter twice in the film, in addition to standing up for him/herself against discrimination.

[Guest princessofdarkness]

I agree with everything you say Asile. Even as a trans woman, the negative depiction of crossdressing men definitely lead to a lot self-hatred growing up. There's no lack of negative depictions to name off, so I won't, but I do think the absolute worst thing you can do is put that into children's programming. Which I saw a lot of growing up. I watch very little television, have so for years, but it wasn't so in Elementary School. So many cartoons I saw carried familiar messages of "Bullying is bad" and "Be Yourself" and then would contradict themselves by featuring a crossdressing or feminine boy as the butt of a joke. Ergo, encouraging bullying of those who are just being themselves.

Unfortunately I can't think of too many positive depictions. I recommend 'Glen or Glenda', though it's often called one of the worst movies of all time. As bizarrely incompetent as it is, it's very sympathetic and serious in it's approach to cross dressers, as the star, director, writer, and producer Ed Wood was a crossdresser. For a better film I recommend 'Ed Wood', the Tim Burton directed bio pic about him. His cross dressing isn't the main focus, but they treat it very sympathetically and well I'd say.

[Guest KatyDesire]

Thank you for the link to the movie, Kenna. I have the feeling it didn't make the circuit in this part of the world.

I don't think it would ever have been a candidate for an Oscar, but I agree - it is sensitively handled and really, in a very short time, actually manages to point to many of the problems CDs have.

What I did find disturbing - although not unexpected - were the comments posted on youtube about it. The juxtaposition of the sympathetic tone of the movie with the hate-filled tone of some of the posts really speaks to many of the problems faced by TGs.

[Guest Lynnette Rae]

my wife was furious after deciding to read an erotica book depicting a crossdresser. the GG in the book treated her like dirt. My wife stopped reading because she does not think that is the way a crossdresser and her GG should act. Although I do most of the housework and take care of the kids I was doing that long before my wife found out I was a crossdresser as I am a stay at home spouse due to being disabled. my GG does not talk down to me we treat each other with love and mutual respect that we know we each deserve. I dress femme because I want to I get to choose my outfits although my wife has bought me some very pretty outfits it is still my choice. My GG lets me be me and I let her be her. There are a few movies I have enjoyed watching like "Tootsie" and "Mrs. Doubtfire" they are comedies but they are very good movies. But I do wish the entertainment world would get a clue and portray us as we really are. I am sorry if this is not under the correct topic but it does seem to fit in.

Hugs and Kisses XOXOXO

[Guest Jocelyn1975]

The only positive crossdressed male I've remember seeing is Drew Carey's brother in the Drew Carey show here in the US. He just was who he was no explanation and didn't try to pass. He just liked to be dressed it was inspiring to me.

[Guest Lynnette Rae]

my wife told me of a movie with Patrick Swayze called "Too Wong Fu" I may have the spelling wrong but she thinks it is a very positive movie about MTF and she said that Swayze did a very positive interview with a magazine after the movie about his role in the movie and even did the interview in a dress and she remembers that he said he didn't care what people thought about him wearing it, it was comfortable. Now I need to find the movie and watch it LOL.

Hugs and Kisses XOXOXO

[Guest Kenna Dixon]

"To Wong Foo Thanks For Everything Julie Newmar"

You can find the film for sale online. It's mostly drag queen-oriented, but there are good points made regarding the transgender condition as well.

[Guest Lynnette Rae]

Thank you. My wife said we have it in storage on VHS now I just have to get a new VHS machine lol.

[Guest Krysii]

It seems as if there is a limited amount story lines that can be interesting and still entertaining regarding cross dressing. I have watched the Too Wong Fu, (misspelling mine), and it does portray a moment or two that seem plausible. Patrick is clocked, but not with venom. I have not been at this site much, and for those times I have been here, I mostly just lurk, and read the posts. I hate making general statements, but in my neighborhood the crossdressers seem to be as afraid and in hiding, as am I. I guess I can't remember a personal ad that was reaching out for humanity, sex, relationship, acceptance, etc. that includes a pic with a face shot not hidden. I have read more than once that some person thinks of themselves as passable, or pretty, or even good looking when they get all dressed and dolled up.

My sense is that they lack the confidence in their make up skills, hair sense, presence, that will allow them to put it on the line, as it were. So in general the limited acquaintances I have made with other cross dressers that are not afraid to be clocked or outed were all drag queens, or prostitutes.

In the realm of birds of a feather flock together, I really haven't felt the urge to flock with them. So another general statement comes to my keyboard, It seems the headlines and story lines about about those who are cast into the deviant (especially sexually deviant), and most surely, gender deviant persons ( I hope this doesn't sound harsh) Are usually about the courage and conviction to put an end to living a lie, or rising above the persecution and becoming successful in their endeavors or more than tolerated, accepted. "As Good As It Gets" Helen Hunt, and the actor whom I can't remember his name. (he played in batman, easy rider, the shining, and at least 400 other movies. He He It might be Jack Nicholson, but I think he is a golfer. Anyway how many times can producers get advertisers to support a story line of a person or group, living in fear, and unable to overcome the fear, so continues the facade that they believe is necessary to coexist in a community.

Above I attempted to convey what is my sense of the prejudice that exists in our culture regarding crossdressing.

Does anyone really think that there is entertainment value to the notion of exposing the truth about crossdressing?

I see such paradoxical forces surrounding the concept, notion, actualization of dress in general.

I know very few people who leave the domicile daily with out putting on the mask, and pretending to be someone other than who they are because the survival needs are achievable by a little sprucing up of the 'image' they project.

Am I totally out of it because I embrace the following perspective?

For me lingerie has a certain stimulating effect, to see me in the mirror wearing an outfit that can only be taken as female is exhilarating. (Think corset, breast forms, hip and butt pads, wig, makeup, nails, the right heels, etc)

It is not much of an effort to find historically events, images, just plain knowing that the wealthy dressed in silks, and the finest linens, men wearing robes, skirts etc. was commonplace. These days I see fruits of the 60's; the sexual revolution, the marxist feminine movement, politically correct speak, relativism, things taking place that just clash with the notion that crossdressing is "Too Deviant'. Im I the only one who has noticed a feminizing of the male trend taking place?

Any one ever watch the tv show where Audra Barkley was forever hoping on a horse and of necessity alway wore riding skirts so she would not have to sit side saddle. In close proximity fashion of the day popularized the cu-lot. It seems to me that these days especially in sports wear, silks and satins are more and more in vogue. I swear the satin shorts that pass for basketball attire surely resemble the cu-lots of 60 years ago. In so many ways I see men crossdressing these days, but like the ladies who were charmed into embracing the femininst movement, or the get out of the house and get a job, make something of yourselves persuasions(another marxist tenant), started wearing "the pants in the family". contemporary men are being gently pushed in the direction of liking/loving the sensual pleasures of traditionally female attire.

I don't imagine I will ever see a program, movie, play, magazine etc educating our culture to the fact that some of us are actually avant guarde, in the clothing arena.

Real men like silk and satin, even if they won't admit it. Microfiber too.

I don't know if anyone will read this whole rant, but if that happens and I failed to convey a clear concept of my thoughts, any questions, editing tips or comments are welcome. Please be gentle, as I am in my nighty.

No extra charge for the poor spelling, and bad grammar.

[Guest Lynnette Rae]

very well put Krysii. I did very much enjoy Your rant as you put it (lol). I feel you were right on point . society in general tend to fantasize and blow out of proportion what they don't understand and mostly will make no effort to understand it. I lived in denial most of my life, I thought I must act like a man because I did not understand my Lynette side. I hid her because I did not want to understand her, I know now that was wrong I pushed people away because I acted like I thought I should being born a male. Don't get me wrong I very much enjoy being a male, but now I am able to show my softer side without fear of being ridiculed. I have taken the first steps towards going out dressed to the 9's. My wife and kids know about me and I am raising the kids to accept people for who they are. I have told some other family members and they have accepted me as well as some friends. Everyone has said for me to be me they accept me no matter how I dress. Now if only society in general would accept us and get to know us this would help more of us come out. I wish that a good story would come out that would portray us as Cross Dressers are in fact just like everyone else we are good people that like to dress as we want. instead we see movies like madea while you know madea is a man she is solely playing that part in character. You don't see her getting made up you only see her in character. I am sorry about my little rant and I know I am chasing pipe dreams and I will probably never live to see the world accepting us or the entertainment world portraying us as real people, but I do hope that my children may know that world. I am not sissified I am me I like wearing pretty clothes I love the feel of silk, satin, lace, microfiber and even the soft cotton that women's t-shirts are made of. I go fishing with my sons but I like to dress pretty while doing it. I love the way high heels make me feel. I am a man and I like to dress as a woman I sleep in pretty and soft nighties but I have a healthy bedroom life with my wife of 10 years. I told her and she does not think I am less of a man for it. Now if only society would accept us for who we truly are. But, it is as if they are afraid to do so. Again it seems as if I let my rant go on and I apologize again and I also apologize for my horrible grammar and punctuation. my old teachers would be having a fit.

[Guest Lynnette Rae]

Kenna thank you very much for that link for the movie I just watched it and it is a very inspiring movie and actually depicts the life of a CD very closely. from the fears to the rejection of our true self