different thought.

[Guest JODYGIRL]

i do understand the need for girls to pass to fit in in their desired roles. for me one of the important things is to correct the body,like most of us but because of where i live any sudden change would make me stand out like a sore thumb and i dont want that. i actually have no problem mentally passing as it were,people round here have just seen me change slowly. im now getting to the point where they sense im trans but they are not sure which way. when i first came out i talked online to a very helpful and supportive woman who told me its not so hard. be yourself and dont try to be what people expect. dont rush it,find out who you are. dont overdo it. and most of all its all about confidence. i am slowly learning what works and what doesnt and things like growing the hair and softening the body take time. the one thing i need to approach is the face. i walk down the street and im as female as any,i dont care whether they see it or not but when i see my reflection in a window i think ive really got to bring that up to how i feel.

[VickySGV]

I think you have the key there, it is not how others see our face, it is how we see it. I tripped on a sidewalk crack the other day, and did some damage to my face that is slowly healing, but does not negate the fact that now I normally like seeing my face and recognizing who is wearing it. With the remains of a black eye and a skinned upper lip I now see it as just me and am happy I did not do worse things to it, but it will heal and I know that. No matter how we look we can see the person we are and when we like us, we are good, no matter what others see.

[Charlize]

This is certainly true. We are happy when we actually see ourselves. I love walking out the door and seeing in a mirror that i'm looking like me and that is more important than how others perceive me. I also know that took a bit of time. At first i felt a bit awkward but again that was caused more buy my worry about others than it was in any acceptance of my self.

My transformation as a bald woman was less than subtle. Simply adding a wig made me unrecognizable in the small town where i know so many people. I had to introduce myself in many situations but was always supported.

I remember going to a movie about our region in which i was featured. People were asking her where i was.

I'm glad you are able to move slowly. It probably causes less shock all around.

Hugs,

Charlize