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Guest Lakenvelder

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Guest Lakenvelder

So..well hello everyone. Im actually a bit amazed at how easy it was to find a forum like this; very cool.

So basically im 26 and a big ole gay bear in the north west. Im dating a sissy boy that recently told me that hes never been happy with his body and has wanted to become a woman for a long time and is looking at getting hormones. Im being supportive and all, it is his body afterall, but id be liar if i said i wasnt inwardly freaked out by this.

I basically came here just to read what others like me have written and said(spouses of..transgendered individuals).

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  • Root Admin

Hello Lakenvelder,

Welcome to Laura's Playground. Please read the site Terms and Conditions and feel free to ask questions. One thing I might comment on is your description of the person you're dating. Refering to him as a "sissy boy" is a somewhat degrading and derogatory description. I would ask that you refer to her with something that is more appropriate.

MaryEllen

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Hello,

I would like to welcome you to the forums, where we will try to help you to understand what your partner is going through and to cope with all of the changes for both of you.

MaryEllen is correct in asking you to please follow the rules of the forum in how you refer to your partner, discrimination and abuse are very common threads in our lives and the PLayground is where we come to avoid these things.

I'm sure that you don't mean anything derogatory by it and possibly your partner doesn't mind it - I had a friend who called his wife weasel and she didn't seem to -wait, bad example - their divorced now, but she never complained about it.

My point is we have some rather fragile people here who have been through a lot and we kind of treat them very kindly.

Now, that's out of the way, do come in and get to know us a little better and we'd like to get to know you better as well.

Traditionaly I offer the new people a seat by the fire and some refreshments and as you refer to yourself as a'big ols gay bear', I think that we should go straight the Pizzas and burgers and get to the hot cocoa and cookies a little later, right?

We will be more than glad to help you, that's what we do support each other.

I'm glad that you care enough about your partner to come here, welcome.

Love ya,

Sally

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Guest Lakenvelder
Hello Lakenvelder,

Welcome to Laura's Playground. Please read the site Terms and Conditions and feel free to ask questions. One thing I might comment on is your description of the person you're dating. Refering to him as a "sissy boy" is a somewhat degrading and derogatory description. I would ask that you refer to her with something that is more appropriate.

MaryEllen

That is what "she" called/still calls "herself". Im not meaning to be derogatory in any way. I didnt know id stepped on a land mine with my first post just because i havent taken the time to learn all the politically correct terminology. I met her as a him, a twink in hig huggers and a belly shirt, she has refered to herself everyday as a "sissy boy". Maybe transgender is the official term, ill try to use that on this forum, okay?

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Hey, Lakenvelder,

I am not offended personally and if your partner likes it that's fine, but here I'd go with she and her, there are a few who are very politically correct and I manage to iratate them sometimes because of my spelling if nothing else.

Come one and relax, we are glad that you are here.

I am more than happy to discuss anything here in the forums and there is a section devoted to SOs.

Sit here in my recliner, although I must warn you it has been known to cause drowziness!

Give everyne a chance to come by and say hello.

Love ya,

Sally

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Guest ~Brenda~

Well Hello Lakenvelder!!

Welcome to Laura's playground!! You are so very welcome here!! I have quite a number of stories like yours where your partner comes out and say that they want to transition. I understand that you are worried and concerned. Your reaction is quite normal. I can only offer you this... your partner needs to be the gender that she is!! Holding her back will only cause more pain! People who realize that they are gender gifted cannot find peace nor happiness until they fullfill who they are. I know this is diffcult to understand, but look at it this way... what if someone tried to stop you from being who you are? Take it day by day, and let things unfold as they will, and try to be understanding. Your relationship will only grow.

Welcome my friend,

bernie

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Lakenvelder, welcome to the forum. Please stick around, and please consider asking your partner to join too :) I'm an SO, like yourself, and the best initial advice I can offer is to always keep lines of communication open with your partner. Don't be afraid to talk, don't be afraid to ask - change can be trying.

One thing I notice hasn't been mentioned yet, which often comes up right away, is therapy: therapy for you, therapy for your partner, alone and apart, and gender therapy. It's not a mandate, by any means, but having someone familiar with these issues can make the road a little easier. Clearly you're already looking to talk - here you are! Excellent first step :)

Hello from the northeast!

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Guest mia 1

Well it is kinda tough to hear the initial conversation from your partner..but when it all settled in you had your "honeys'' interest at heart and that is the important thing...so welcome and keep us posted on how things develop between you two........Mia............................

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Guest Naomi Stardust

Welcome to the Laura's forums!

hope you can find the advice you need, you probably will

there's a lot of people here and a lot of different backgrounds

but while you're looking for the right advice,

be sure to give some of your own!

enjoy the site!

Naomi

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