Finally Worked up the Courage

[Guest]

Sorry for being away so long. I like visiting, but my neurological problem (sever neck/back pain) really kills me, and by the end of the day I'm whipped. Weekends I take advantage for a little while to do some girl shopping with my wife. I finally got off the Gabapentin because I determined it was the cause of my severe migraines, and it also messed with my head something fierce. Now they want to put me on Cymbalta, but I'm not biting. I started using my wife's old TENS machine and it does help. I think I'll have to buy one that is a bit newer than her greater than15 year old unit.

When i got off the Gabapentin, my progress backed up a bit, like I said, it was messing with my brain.

I'm continuing to get back to where I was and becoming more bold about it all. Last weekend I finally got my brows threaded. HOLY CRAP that was ROUGH! Nothing too extreme that will stand out while in Daniel mode, but definitely cleaned up and a bit of shaping. I also got another piercing. I've had my left ear double pierced and right ear single pierced for decades. I finally got the second hole in my right ear. But, I didn't do the traditional 'gun' method. I had been reading about the sanitary problems and the additional pain caused by the 'gun'. I do recall the 'pinching' of the stud that I would have to relieve later by letting out the back of the piercing stud. Nope, this time I went to a professional piercing shop and had it done with a needle.

There was a slight sting initially and occasional slight notification of something being there, but never any real pain. And the fact that I used the needle method, I was able to have a hoop installed rather than a stud. Why is this important? Because my other three earrings are hoops. I've never been a 'stud' kinda gal, always liked dangling or hoops. Whenever you see someone with a hoop with a small bead, that was likely a new needle piercing,

I don't recall where I left off on the shaving topic, and being a lazy girl I don't feel like reading this thread again In any case, I shave my entire body these days. The only hair I have is on the top of my head, my shaped brows (from threading) and my eyelashes. Other than that, I'm smooth and I can't tell you how beautiful it feels, every day. Yeah, it kinda sucks having to shave every day, but I love being hairless

My therapist has asked me to think about what I'm doing while preparing, shaving, makeup or dressing and such and see what and how I feel. One thing I noticed is I receive the most pleasure while shaving my arm pits. I thought for a while about why that one little obscure location that NO ONE sees, gives me so much pleasure. The only thing I can come up with is it's the one location where the vast majority of men that might shave their bodies, wouldn't shave. Whether or not that's the reason doesn't really mater I guess.

I love every part of underdressing and dressing. I don't know that I appreciate any part more than any other, but I absolutely have to be underdressed at the very leas, and 95% of that time I'm wearing small forms that can be clearly seen. I carry a purse these days, it's a Coach Man-Bag, but a purse none-the-less. But my wallet is a woman's wallet. Frankly, the only difference I saw between the men's and women's wallets were the women's has a longer strap on the zipper pull.

Well, I guess I've babbled enough for now.

[Guest]

I should mention that it was my wife that pushed me, or talked me into getting my eyebrows threaded. I can't tell everyone how supportive she's been through all this. I'm certain I wouldn't be where I am if it weren't for her. I love her so much.

By the way, I saw a Made for HBO movie the other day called 'Normal' about a middle aged couple. The husband finally came out about how unhappy he was as a male. It basically showed the story of his problems and her problems dealing with it all. I watched it twice and it is definitely worth watching, at least to me. It was both sad and happy. The sad parts are watching what his family went through before accepting it. And beautiful when it all came together.....

[Guest Charlotte J.]

Fiona, I'm glad to see you posting again! I'm sorry that you've been in so much physical pain. It sounds like you are still trying to figure out the best way to handle that, and that you are making some progress. Hope you can get some serious relief soon.

Shaving. I don't do it every day, nor am I as thorough as you, but I can relate. Having a hairless belly for me is very pleasing. Before I began to accept being trans, I would often go for long stretches without shaving my face. I felt like it was too much work and the beard grew back too quickly. That's changed and now I shave my face every day at least once, but usually twice or even three times--like I said, the beard grows fast. I have a five o'clock shadow by noon. So maybe some laser treatment is in my future. I also trimmed my armpits the other day. That's the extent of my shaving.

I'm glad that your wife continues to be awesome. I mean, she not only seems supportive, but encouraging. That's fantastic! My wife continues to be supportive as well, and even proposed a mutual toenail-painting this past weekend. I was all over that. My toenails are still a lacquered, muted pink. I don't want to take the polish off.

Thanks for babbling. I hope that you babble to us again soon. I enjoy reading your posts.

[Guest]

Thanx, Charlotte.My facial hair also grows far too fast. I must shave three times a day minimum, but sometimes I just shave twice. This weekend we tried the new 'Whim' Shellac (Gel) polish systems from Ulta, but no UV is required. It's definitely a much thicker coating than even the standard Sephora 3-step system, but there's not a large color selection as of yet and we're still trying to figure out whether we like it. My toes are a sparkly light pink and my fingers are very light pink.

While shaving in the shower I somehow caught my left thumbnail this morning and so I have to redo my thumb tonight Grrrrrrrrr........

Because my wife's hair is thinning on the crown we finally searched for a professional wig shop rather than the typical 'place that sells wigs' and we visited it this weekend. She ordered a human-hair hair-piece to cover that area and then we started looking around. Even though I've never liked short hair I've been kind of interested in a shorter wig for ease and when it's just too hot. Yup, bought another wig. Hehe. It's a short 'bob' style and we pick them up in a couple weeks. I'll pics up when I can.

We left and I realized that I never asked her about fitment and wig caps because the nylon cap causes me terrible pain and the cotton cap is useless. I walked back in and walked up to her and said "I'm just going to say it. I also wear wigs and need some help with wig caps". She stared at me for a second (while the wheels turned) and said "crossdresser"? I said "well, it goes a bit deeper than that". She said "that's great, does your wife know"? I laughed and told her she does and shes just waiting in the truck because this shouldn't take more than a minute, "how can I help"?

She ended up asking me why I thought I needed a cap and I told her the place I bought it suggested it. She told me that I didn't need it and gave me a water soluble adhesive to try around the forehead band for a little extra stick. In any case, I know where I'll be getting my wigs from now on.

Yesterday we spent the day at home relaxing and doing a few chores, I wore a cute pink top with horizontal slits across the back and a pair of denim capris, and a pair of black strappy wedges. I also threw on my cheaper dirty blonde wig when we decided to go into our back yard. I was so very content

I started acupuncture last week and have another appt today. It seemed to help a bit and I found the whole experience very relaxing. I also have a neurological nerve test being done Friday, so here's hoping.

TTFN

-Fiona

[Guest suden]

Hi Fiona- This is Eden. I too love to have a hairless body. I found a woman who does waxing and other methods of removal. I now get my legs and tummy wax it takes about 45 min. and lasts about 4 to 5 weeks.

I figure the money I save on hot water pays for the waxing! Just kidding. think about the waxing. The pain is not that bad really! I still shave under my arms and chest. And the beard god save us all from the beard.

I hope you find the answer to your pain! Eden

[Guest]

My wife has been asking me questions about estrogen, I thought it was a bit strange and perhaps just curiosity. Last weekend she cornered me and asked me to be honest about it. I told her "Honestly, it has been on my mind but since I can't take the chance in you no longer being attracted to me if my face feminizes too much, it's not in the cards".

It sounds like she's working through all this in her head, but I still won't think about it too much so that there's no possibility of disappointment.

Hi Fiona- This is Eden. I too love to have a hairless body. I found a woman who does waxing and other methods of removal. I now get my legs and tummy wax it takes about 45 min. and lasts about 4 to 5 weeks.

I figure the money I save on hot water pays for the waxing! Just kidding. think about the waxing. The pain is not that bad really! I still shave under my arms and chest. And the beard god save us all from the beard.

I hope you find the answer to your pain! Eden

Hi Eden. I know another Eden from TBFS, is this the same Eden? That has to be expensive, waxing half the body a month?

Here's a few more photos

**HUGS**

-Fiona

[Guest ErIca W]

Fiona, you look so pretty, and content in your pictures.

Hugs,

Erica

[tracy_j]

Nice pictures

I think it's time I did a few close ups!

Tracy

[Guest ErIca W]

Fiona,

Love your short hair as well as your long. You look lovely. It's mostly in your smile and the look of contentment in your eyes.

So sweet.

Hugs,

Erica

[Guest]

Fiona, you look so pretty, and content in your pictures.

Hugs,

Erica

Nice pictures

I think it's time I did a few close ups!

Tracy

Fiona,

Love your short hair as well as your long. You look lovely. It's mostly in your smile and the look of contentment in your eyes.

So sweet.

Hugs,

Erica

Awwwe, thanx. My wig will be ready this weekend but due to a BBQ we're having, I'll have to do that and the styling the following weekend. Grrrrrrrr........