Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Acceptance


Charlize

Recommended Posts

  • Forum Moderator

This quote is from page 417 of the book called "Alcoholics Anonymous" which while also called the big book is where AA got it's name.

And acceptance is the answer to all my problems
today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some
person, place, thing, or situation—some fact of my life
—unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until
I accept that person, place, thing, or situation as being
exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment.
Nothing, absolutely nothing, happens in God’s world
by mistake. Until I could accept my alcoholism, I
could not stay sober; unless I accept life completely
on life’s terms, I cannot be happy. I need to concen-
trate not so much on what needs to be changed in the
world as on what needs to be changed in me and in
my attitudes.
This passage is so important to my life both as an alcoholic, addict and as a trans* person. Accepting that i was an addict was so important in looking for a solution. That is the first step for any problem. Accepting myself was equally hard if not harder. It took and continues to take time. I have to accept amongst other things that my body will never be right and that i've lived so much of my life trying to be what i wasn't. Accepting life on its terms requires that i somehow relax my expectations. I must move as i can looking at the trail rather than the goal. If i can do that day by day and not dwell on what i can't change i do find some peace with the world.
Hugs,
Charlize an alcoholic
Link to comment
Guest Lara-Saphire

Hi Charlize ....... Hmm m Ok so you reading my mind now :blink: Ha Ha Ha !

There is a thought I carry around since my early day's in AA , first year I think . I backed into AA when I was 22, Sober since then. I'm 57 this month.

Anyway , there is a passage in the big book of "AA" that reads like and I quote "It is a spiritual axiom that when ever I am hurt or upset I am at fault ", doesn't matter whether it was caused by some one else or myself. In all the years I attended meetings and shared with others over coffee I have never heard much as a whisper on the subject and yet there you are today making a Quote that just surprises me . Yes I've had many discussions around that subject . Now, your thoughts, I would think as they relate to the quote for me are are spot on. Your Quote kinda spells out in a long version, what mine means to me if that makes sense???

After reading your post I had to go and look for your " Quote" I had to go and look it up just to make sure, It's not in my book I have The 1st addition . So I phoned a friend who I know has the current one, gonna go for a visit and read the story which has the quote you wrote .

I've always bin very introspective and somewhat prone to being my own worst enemy at times. Putting it more simply "I think too much" . It has been a blessing and a curse for me threw out my life although I'd say more of a blessing these day's.

As it turns out since finding my way to Laura' Playground and I quote your passage again " Nothing, absolutely nothing, happens in gods world by mistake" , I see, feel or hear things only when I am ready to see, hear or feel them. It just amazes me what I find discussed so openly and freely here in the forum's . I only hope I can help others someday half as much as you have all helped me :)

I find myself looking back and connecting the dots trying to put the pieces of my life together with my present understanding. Me as a Cross Dresser fits my whole life, It's like the missing link! At least that's what eye see when I look back.

Anyway, so much of what I read here strikes a cord with me . Thanks for your Quote. Thanks for your thoughts.

I've enjoyed reading many of your post's.

:) Lara

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Thank you Lara that quote is from the 4th addition of the BB. It has been used as a topic in discussion meeting both in the TGAA Skype meeting i attend and at a GLBTQ meeting i lead last night. It simply makes sense to me. Years ago at university during an acid trip i was doing calligraphy. One bit i saved was a picture of some grasses with the words: "everything is perfect...How else could it be". I just hope that i can make enough progress in spirituality to understand that when i'm sober as well.

Hugs,

Charlize

Link to comment
Guest suden

You have that right -(keeping you eyes on the trail)- step from one rock to the next with out slipping off.

If we keep focused - life will just fill up with friends and moments to remember.

eden

Link to comment
Guest Lara-Saphire

Thanks Charlize, I borrowed the 4th addition from a friend , seem to have found a new reason to study the Big Book. Going to start with reading the story you quoted from. Had to google what GLBTQ stood for , I get it now. Still getting familiar with what all the letters I see used stand for.

Would it be okay to PM you and add you as a Friend! I have a few Questions regarding AA and the TG community in general.

Not sure if they would be appropriate in these forums to discus them.

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Absolutely on all counts. I am more than happy to try and help as i can.

Hugs,

Charlize

Link to comment
Guest Lara-Saphire

Ok Thanks Charlize :) Just so You know I'm OK ! Lara was excluded from the whole AA experience in every possible way, a realization I must

correct . One day at a time sounds good to me right now. Talk to you soon.

Thanks a bunch

Lara

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   1 Member, 0 Anonymous, 250 Guests (See full list)

    • DeeDee
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.8k
    • Total Posts
      770.1k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,093
    • Most Online
      8,356

    gizgizgizzie
    Newest Member
    gizgizgizzie
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Angelo christoper
      Angelo christoper
      (38 years old)
    2. Joslynn
      Joslynn
      (61 years old)
    3. Kaltia_Atlas
      Kaltia_Atlas
    4. Rika_Lil
      Rika_Lil
      (40 years old)
    5. Summerluv
      Summerluv
      (19 years old)
  • Posts

    • VickySGV
      I want to hold back on this one until more solid information comes out.  The defendant is claiming it was accidental, but the Trans side is demanding a hate crime scenario which an accident would preclude.  Pardon the phrase, but as I read this folks are jumping the gun here.
    • Carolyn Marie
      https://www.advocate.com/crime/trans-teen-jazlynn-johnson-killed   This is a tragic ruination of two young lives.  It is very sad.  May Jazlynn rest in peace.   Carolyn Marie
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      Well, here's the big questions:  What does it mean to be masculine?  What does it mean to be a woman?    I've been around a lot of rule-bending in those areas.  There's all sorts of "traditional" views about what men and women do.  Men work on mechanical things, defend/protect, earn a living, play rough sports, etc.  Women cook and clean, are gentle and nurturing, value aesthetics over function, etc.   Yet, my very "masculine" industrial-manager husband cooks just as well as any Betty Crocker wannabe, and tells the bedtime stories that are most in-demand by the kids.  My GF, who is surely "ALL Girl" is a highly skilled mechanic, a street racer, was busily laying concrete while 6 months pregnant, and practices kenjutsu (Japanese sword fighting skills).  And me?  I'm AFAB but I'm infertile and I feel like I should have had a male body...yet I possess very little in the way of "manly" skills or desire to acquire them.  I'm in my boy form these days, but pretty much useless for accomplishing "boy stuff."     I think my family blew those definitions out of the water.  Yet, somehow our family structure is also religiously patriarchal....and happily so!  It'll bend your brain to try to figure that one out.    I'd say its just important to be you, do what you do best, and stick your tongue out at anybody who doesn't like it. 
    • JenniferB
      Welcome to the board gizgizgizzie! I sure can understand what dysphoria feels like. I found it stayed in my head during nearly all waking hours. Although, sometimes held in a little deeper. But it was triggered easily. I hope you can find that place you feel comfortable with yourself. This is a good place to find help as you traverse your journey.   Jennifer
    • VickySGV
      Welcome to the Forums @gizgizgizzie we have folks in your situations to talk to and share with. 
    • gizgizgizzie
      hi everyone, my name is giz (or gizzie), i use all prns but i prefer they/it and i just found out abt this place pretty recently !! im really excited to find community among other trans people from so many walks of life !! in my personal life, i do have trans/queer friends but its not easy to navigate that without coming out all willy nilly (and i can't come out to my family, pretty much ever) so this is a pretty good place for me to get to know people and make new friends !!   i also have this weird dysphoria issue that i feel like everyone (and society at large lol) is attaching me to categories and boxes that don't really fit me (obviously this is to do with my agab) so being here without that presentation is also really helpful !!   i also hope to be able to start and share my transitions goals and things like that (just getting my body to a more androgynous look) !!   thanks for reading, and i hope to see more of y'all soon !!
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      Well, my friends are out publicly. Openly transgender, and on HRT.  I agree that the survival of all of us is at stake.  But I think there are threats greater and more dangerous than those faced exclusively by LGBTQ folks.   Rising prices. Unaffordable food.  EPA strangling transportation and energy.  Needless foreign wars that put us at risk of literal nuclear annihilation.  A government that wants to tax us, track us, and control every aspect of our lives...including using us as guinea pigs for their medical experiments.     Trump is no savior.  Neither is the Republican party.  But I believe that a vote for Democrats in the federal government is for sure a vote for globalism and what follows it.  War, famine, plague, slavery, and death don't care if we're trans or cis.  
    • Ladypcnj
      There is light at the end of the tunnel, just believe. 
    • Ashley0616
      Y’all are pretty ladies
    • Ashley0616
    • Ivy
      People who are out publicly, and openly transgender, maybe on HRT, having changed names and gender, have a lot to lose if anti-trans politicians take power.  They have openly called for our eradication, and promise to do everything they can to accomplish this.  (again, 2025) For someone in this position the election is about our survival.  It's foolish to delude ourselves into thinking "Oh, they don't really mean that.  It's all for show," or, "There's other more important things to concern ourselves with." Maybe for some people the other things take priority.  But if you have skin in the game, things look different.  
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      If that happens, a lot of things I don't want to see might also be codified into law.  And some things that shouldn't be law might not get repealed.  To me, progress in one area isn't worth the price we'd have to pay in several other areas.     For me, voting on LGBTQ issues always ends up as an "out of the frying pan, but into the fire" sort of event.  
    • Ivy
      Trying out a new wig. Got my reading glasses on. I've also got dark roots now - first time in years.
    • Vidanjali
      Thea, your post made me think of a comic named Chloe Petts whom I saw recently on Hannah Gadsby's Gender Agenda comedy special on Netflix. She is a cisgender masculine lesbian. She is brilliant and so funny. I was intrigued by her identification - specifically masculine, not butch. And it seems to me there is a difference. 
    • Vidanjali
      Today I had a dr appt. When I checked in, I was asked my surname, which I gave. Apparently there were two patients with appointments at that time with that same surname. The receptionist asked, "Are you (my legal name which is feminine) or Paul?" I got such a kick out of it not being assumed I had the feminine name. 
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...