My weekend blow out (Good)

[CiCi_73]

Hi everyone,

So much has happened in such a short span of time. Probably too much for one post so I may post another thread in the TG forum. But for now, here's my story.

On Sunday I went in for my makeover. She specializes in TG makeovers and was able to give me some good tips on getting a more femme look. Then she did my makeup, and the results are now my profile pic.

So I left her place fully dressed - summer dress, heels, the other necessary items for getting that female shape, and I felt so happy and free. In the other mode I've always felt just a little off, a little uncomfortable in the world. But I felt awesome as me (Courtney). So as I was driving back I thought to myself "Seems like a waste to get all dressed up and not do anything but go back home and hide." Instead, I decided to stop at our town center (a big open area with shops, restaurants, people, you name it). I told myself initially that I would just go into the store and pretend to shop for food. But I got out of the car and started walking around, paying very close attention to people's reactions, and ....

Nothing. No stares, pointing, jeering, laughing, nothing.

So I kept on. I walked around (slowly, as the heels were starting to irritate my feet). Then I walked into a clothing store and started looking at dresses. I was the only customer there, and the woman at the register started interacting with me normally. She even had me take a dress into the dressing room and try it on (gasp!). Then she put another dress on me over the one I was wearing as it zipped in the front, and said how well it showed off my figure. Oh God, I was in heaven. I know it is her job to move merchandise, and she could just have been very cool about me if she knew I was a genetic male, but the experience was so intoxicating, I felt like I was floating.

Stopped in a Starbucks after that and got a drink. No discernible reactions from anybody. And I'm a rather keen observer of people, so either everyone around where I live is extremely accepting of T-girls, or I passed.

Left the town square, went home. Then my soon to be ex-wife returned from her weekend out (just going to refer to her as XSO to keep it short) and I convinced her to go out to dinner with me. So we did. Again, nothing but normal treatment from others - a couple of times the restaurant staff referred to us as "ladies" and I couldn't have been more thrilled.

All in all a marvelous experience. And whether or not I really "passed" doesn't matter to me. What matters is that I now have the confidence to go out in the world and interact with it as Courtney. I wrote in my journal "The girl is unleashed. There will be no more putting her back in the cage." And it's true - I have been Courtney ever since. I will write more about this aspect of things in the TG forum since this post has gone on too long. But thank you, everyone, for listening and for your support. This is becoming a most excellent adventure, thanks in no small part to all of you here at LP

Lots of love,

Courtney

[Samantha2015]

If I ever muster the courage to go out I hope I have as perfect a day as you had.

That sounds fantastic.

[Guest]

What a great story. I'm so happy for you. I'm glad that things went so well. It's amazing how most people really don't care how other's look or act. It is usually only a small minority that make the biggest noise. It was still very brave of you to have the courage to just get out there.

I have never had a makeover, but I would like to get one someday if I ever build up the courage.

Jayne

[Charlize]

Just getting out as yourself is so empowering. The first few steps are the hardest. Maybe that is because so many of us take those steps in uncomfortable heels. .

More fun to come. Just wear flats unless you can sit at times.

Hugs,

Charlize

[Guest JaneShannon]

Courtney,

What a wonderful story! Sounds like you had a great day. I have only been out and about a few times and noticed the same thing. Either I passed or people just didn't really care.

Good Luck...You Go Girl!

JaneShannon

[gennee]

Thank you for sharing about your day, Courtney. I remember the first time I went out publicly by myself. It was so mind blowing! Got hit on at least a half dozen times. Felt good to be a lady going about her life.

[Guest April Kristie]

So proud of you Courtney, but it is just about as easy as you lived it, there is a downside...being hit on...ha ha. I had my hair done and we went to the home improvement center and two men would not leave me alone, as a confirmed lesbian I was aghast. Best to you sweetie.

[Guest AshleighP]

Such a fun, positive experience! It makes me wonder what we worry about when we go out. Most people are too busy with their own lives to even give us a second glance, yet we assume they're staring and pointing behind our backs. Even if they do, should we care? Blessings!

[tracy_j]

Wonderful

[CiCi_73]

Thanks, everyone, for your encouraging words. They all mean so much to me. It's really great when you know you have so many great people in your corner. It has been so hard, before, living in the dark, not understanding anything, suffering so much anguish when the solution (as I have now experienced it) seems simple in hindsight. Wish I'd known what was really going on years ago, but I guess it takes what it takes. But it definitely feels really good to live in the light as myself.

I drove about 8 hours today (as me ) to visit a friend who lives a couple of states away. I did my best to manage the bathroom issue (used women's rooms that only allowed one person at a time, except the last time, but there was only one other person in the restroom and I was in and out before she finished so I never saw her). The only hiccup was having to present ID when checking into the hotel, but the concierge seemed to take it in stride. Still a bit nervous, though. I left my very liberal state and am now in solid blue country, and I was not encouraged when I saw two guys walking out of a pawn shop with what looked like rifles. I'm not usually one to freak myself out, but I put a chair in front of the door just in case

I think I'd like to find a way to tell this friend of mine what is going on. I certainly have enough to tell him since this will be the first time I've talked about my impending divorce with anyone, but it sure would be nice to also talk about being trans. As it turns out, he has a relation (nephew that was born his neice) who is also trans, so if I can gauge how he's feeling about that, then I can decide if now is a good time to tell him about me.

Just kinda depressing to think I'll have to spend part of tomorrow as the other guy. Maybe I'll go shopping afterwards

Love to all,

Courtney

[LaurenSimpson]

Good luck!