First eTherapy Session + Eyebrow Goals

[Guest Alicia Rose]

Yesterday was my first eTherapy session. I've contacted many "Online Therapist" listed on Laura's Playground section via e-mail, but only a few replied. The first didn't seem to genuinely want to help me so we never spoke, another was unable to help due to their licensing area but encouraged me to keep trying and the last one to replied was very kind and understanding.

We spoke for about an hour; she was interested in my life and wanted to know where I wanted to be. She understands my goal is HRT and is going to help me get there. She gave me a personal goal, which is something I've wanted to do but makes me very nervous - and she knows this.

She said she was impressed with how feminine I look already and said that if I was able to find a trans-friendly salon to get my eyebrows shaped that it would make me look so much more feminine which I know and agree with. She asked me to call around and try to find a trans-friendly salon by the next time we chat again (in a week).

That's where I get nervous. Not that I don't want to.. but if I did.. that's me basically 'coming out' and everyone would notice. One on hand, I already appear more feminine and get mis-gendered because of my style but I'm technically not 'out' yet. On the other hand I don't feel I'm able to successfully pass yet because of my voice, I have no support system of understanding friends and I'm not good with make-up or really even 'have a life' outside of my apartment and work.

How did you or could someone start physically changing their appearance like eyebrows? Did you all come out first? People WILL notice and secrets will start being more obvious.

Right now in my life, I'm at that awkward stage. Because I know I look fairly feminine but don't try to pass with how I walk, talk nor do I use noticeable make-up and my hair is colorful but frizzy and I can't manage it well.

If I had a choice, I'd join a support group and try to make friends. Doing this alone is daunting.

[Jani]

I wouldn't stress over having your eyebrows shaped. Nowadays, there are guys who have this done as well as having their nails manicured. Call around to find a place that will take an appointment and go in as yourself. When you are there if asked just say they were getting a bit unruly and you want to see how they will look. If the "T" subject comes up you can decide whether or not to discuss it. Don't stress. Have fun.

Cheers,

Jani

[Guest Clair Dufour]

I believe in the Salami Method that is a little slice at a time and nobody notices. Then you don't go out feeling like you got it wrong. Also, the range of women's clothing is such that it is only a matter of Fashion Sense to pick what we can wear and when. If you want to max your look, you need to find safe places where you can do it and get honest comments from others. Here we have 2-3 events a week with every thing from drag to full time people. Some are so good you cant tell who they are in their other mode.