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First visit to the mall!


SugarMagnolia

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Today, I took a leap of faith and went to the mall dressed as a woman for the first time. I've been to support groups dressed, but never out in a regular public space before, so this was a very new experience...and it went great!

I hadn't planned to go out, but I was practicing applying makeup and then ended up putting a casual outfit together. It looked good enough that I wanted to see if I would blend in as well as I thought. So, out the door and off to the mall I went.

I probably only stayed for an hour, but I browsed Nordstrom's and Sephora's, walked around the entire mall window shopping, and purchased a few things. Amazingly, I heard zero comments, saw no double takes, and only saw one person stare at me in an uncomfortable way. I was pleasantly surprised because I had steeled myself for everything you can imagine. Afterwards, I went to Nordstrom Rack and felt perfectly at home -- just another girl. :-)

It just shows that most people are focused on what they're doing and pay much less attention to others than we fear. A blurry photo of my outfit is below. Nothing special, and maybe that's something for me to remember.

I couldn't have done it without reading the stories here of other people doing the same, so thank you to everyone that's posted their story of going out!

~Julie

https://nxappw.bn1301.livefilestore.com/y3m3bavUTTUqJvkh-uxzt_Lh3L343bLyAWmAKY5zxCEoSEBqKZacwL14ztuOuBcy3eWQljVB-C1wBtPWu9qLWGpta0FpHKLX86BKjsUgb2QiHHU0C6HPepgpDlWddSmKacZnxxODGa0FgPwk1TPZCNc2g5GEtmDLxObLlFvc_5AhqU?width=186&height=660&cropmode=none

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Hey Julie, you look pretty good in the that photo! That's a great vibe going with the straw handbag.

I recall when my therapist suggested that I stop and put a few gallons of gas in my car on the way home from a meeting. I was terrified that everyone would point and the earth would swallow me. Nothing happened except I filled the tank. After that it was onward and outward. I could do it. So can you! It's liberating.

Jani

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iThanks Jani - The clothes are mine, but I must give my wife credit for the handbag. The "everyone pointing" feeling is exactly what I felt like, but luckily no mobs of angry torch-wielding trans-phobes were anywhere to be found!

LesleyAnne - That's so nice of you to say. I'm working on the looking great and feeling confident part, but the "happy" is definitely real. :-)

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I remember the intense fear but also the relief and joy at just being me for a bit outside of the closet. It is great that you've got the support you do from your wife. The more i went out the easier and more comfortable i became.

You look great.

Hugs,

Charlize

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Guest Lizzie McTrucker

I was very wary of malls when I first started out because of how mean teenagers can be when left unsupervised and in a group. Glad your experience went well!

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It's a very strange feeling at first. Almost like appearing naked and expecting everyone to laugh.

In practice very few even notice and far less do more than glance.

Confidence grows :)

Enjoy your shopping!

Tracy

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Guest Clair Dufour

You look great and I can tell that your wife is helping you with fashion sense and the right wardrobe in the right place. Blend in an few notice.

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