Employment

[Emmett.p]

Im going to be starting my transition soon and I still have this fear of losing my job or not finding one due to the transition any advice out there I could really use some settling of the mind my anxiety is going a hundred miles an hour

[Carolyn Marie]

Hello, Emmett.  I understand your concerns.  Job protection is a huge issue for many, if not most of us who transition in the workplace.

 

To be quite honest, Florida has no statewide protections for trans people.  So if your company discriminates against you, there is no state agency that you can file a complaint with.  There are some federal court rulings that might offer protections if the company has more than 35 employees, but that's not a sure bet, either.  You should check with your city or county to see if there are any local gender discrimination statutes.

 

If your company is large or part of a national corporation, you're probably in better luck.  Ask HR for a copy of the company's discrimination policies and procedures.  That will tell you a lot about whether they will back you up or if you're on your own.  Most national corporations have solid anti-discrimination policies in place that include transgender employees.  Small companies, not so much.

 

There are good resources at these web sites:

 

hrc.org;   transequality.org, and transgenderlawcenter.org. 

 

Good luck, hon.

 

Carolyn Marie

[SunnyKay]

I'm sorry to hear you have so much anxiety. I think it's well placed anxiety initially, but I hope it decreases with time. I was worried myself before I cam out at work, but then my brain kinda went into, "what I have to lose," mode and I just did it. It's definitely an action that has real risks. I hope you figure out what to do, and find the support you need to move forward with you decision.  

 

All The Best,

Sunny Kay

[JJ]

Things sometimes do get difficult on the job with transition. But I have been surprised at how many positive experiences I've heard about over the years. I am retired but I live in one of the most conservative areas in the country where I am the only trans person to ever come out. I expected crosses burning on the lawn and death threats in the mail - the clan is strong and open here. 

Evangelical churches outnumber businesses in the county with Assembly of God and Southern Baptist being the largest. My next door neighbors are devout Southern Baptists.

 

What I found instead of what I expected was acceptance beyond anything I experienced in this insular community before. They don't like to be reminded I was ever different and a couple of times have said they have even forgotten I was ever different. My next door neighbors are as friendly and nice as ever.

 

I decided before I started to come out to accept how they felt because this is something they cannot understand and everything they have heard has been wrong. I transitioned but no matter how they reacted kept smiling and was friendly. I didn't let myself look or feel like a victim or afraid or self conscious although I was sometimes very much feeling at least one of those things. I didn't fight them or act like they were my enemies. And as I became more at home in my own skin they liked me better and responded to the friendliness and eventually wanted to accept me. Though as I said they want to forget I.m trans and just go on as if I was how I am now for the first 6 1/2 years I lived here as well as the last 7 or so.

Ive been invited to work school functions for the band boosters and welcomed back into the community theater where Ive directed the two biggest productions the last 2 years and designed sets for all the productions. I realize those aren't jobs but they do show that people can accept and interact in positive ways. Even in very conservative communities.

All you can do is give it your best shot. Times have changed even since I transitioned. By and large as long as we stay positive most people are willing to reflect our attitudes back.

 

I wish you all the best!

 

Johnny

[DenimAndLace]

What they said! ^^^ Your fears are legitimate and I certainly don't want to diminish them however, I was going to write something similar to what JJ said.  If they smell fear, they'll pounce in it.  It's similar to transition in my opinion.  If you you know who you are and are self confident enough, no one will be able to sway you.  Likewise, no matter what your work environment is, be confident in yourself and be confident in your skills.  Transgender people, in my opinion, are amazing employees because we will do what other say is impossible.  We will find solutions to problems others would give up on.  We can stand firm in our convictions when lesser characters would cower. Are you good at what you do?  Are you dependable?  Are you ethical?  Are you punctual and hard working?  If all of that and they still shove you out the door, it was a poor place to work anyway whether you are trans or cis.  Keep you chin up and go kick some tush!

[Jani]

37 minutes ago, DenimAndLace said:

If you you know who you are and are self confident enough, no one will be able to sway you.  Likewise, no matter what your work environment is, be confident in yourself and be confident in your skills. 

This is important.  Stand tall and be proud of yourself.   People can sense confidence, just as they can fear.  

 

And I think (my opinion only) that guys would have a better go at the job market due to societal norms.  Unfortunately women are already viewed as not qualified in many situations and are paid less too, due to the patriarchal schema.   I know you are stressing and probably will do more, but please don't or at least limit it.  

 

My experience from all kinds of situations beyond transition is that we tend to overthink things and create issues that may never materialize.  Don't worry about things you cannot change.  And look to mitigate the ones you can only if they truly affect you.  I've learned to not look for the monsters under my bed and I recommend you don't either.   

 

Jani