New horizons new opportunities.

[Kali-Ann Gills]

Hello everyone,

I am Kali-Ann a 57 year old transgender woman. I have been living permanently as a woman now for almost three years one year of that on HRT. To be honest this is my second time living as me,  the first was when I was a very young girl. My mother understood very quickly that I was rather different to the other children. At the age of 11 I broke down and explained that I was not happy pretending being a boy, from that moment forward I was brought up as a girl. This was in the early 70's the world was a very hostile place for the lgbt communities. However, doctors attempted to 'cure' me one even suggested electric shock treatment obviously all attempts failed. Transgender was almost unheard of indeed even most of the medical profession had no idea what to do with me. Up until 76/77 I was a very happy girl then at 16 the real world kicked in and I realised very quickly that I would have to revert if I wanted to have any kind of life. There were no laws back then protecting transgender people as now and 'queer bashing' was almost a national pass time. 

I staggered from one disaster to another job after job. I always dressed as me in the evening and at weekends although it felt right I really had no idea what I was. Then in the mid 80's I found Caroline Cossys' book "I am a woman" suddenly everything made sense.

I began to make enquiries about what was available and where; it quickly became clear that there was almost nothing on the NHS and precious little more privately. I determined that my best course of action was to hold tight until things hopefully changed. It was a very long wait.

When things did begin to improve my mother became seriously ill I spent many years looking after her because of this my dreams were once again put on hold.

My mother passed away in 2014 one of the last things that she said to me was "go and do what you need now".

The following February I started the long road to achieving my dream of finally being what I knew I was: a woman. Now I live as a woman, have my own nail technician business. I have a lovely boyfriend who accepts me as I am and we plan to marry as soon as I can get my new birth certificate. Once again I am happy.

Being transgender is difficult stressful, frustrating and at times painful. I still have a way to go however, watching the changes to my body with HRT is nothing short of wondrous. Of course I will never be a super model but I am determined to be the best I can. I will never give up, we all have the right to be happy. Many will never understand us; some may even fear us. Please don't hate them pity them. It is human nature to fear what they do not understand. 

Education is the way forward; and we have a duty to be part of that process; because who understands us better than we do? 

When Robert and I go to our local for a drink and a meal I am forever been asked questions "what is it like,  how do you know,? Most people are blown away their attitudes changed. No longer suspicious indeed many state their admiration.

There is always light at the end of the tunnel. The situation for transgender people has changed immensely even in the last 10 years. Unfortunately there are and always will be those who refuse to accept or understand us however, they are rapidly becoming the minority. My favourite quote is " those who shout about us the loudest probably have the most to hide".

We are unique, beautiful and fabulous. We have nothing to be ashamed of. Live your life, love yourself, love others, love your boyfriend/ girlfriend.  Be true to who you are. Pride isn't just a festival or parade, pride is a state of mind.

Transgender is not a choice however, we do choose to do something about it. Hold your heads high.

All my love to all of you sisters and brothers who have the courage to be. " It is far better to be a human doing than simply a human being ".

Stay safe, stay focused the dream is attainable.

Kali-Ann ????

[MaryEllen]

Hello Kalli-Ann,

Welcome to TransPulse. Thank you for sharing with us.   

 

MaryEllen

[Kali-Ann Gills]

12 minutes ago, MaryEllen said:

Hello Kalli-Ann,

Welcome to TransPulse. Thank you for sharing with us.   

 

MaryEllen

Thank you MaryEllen ??

[Timber Wolf]

Hi Kali-Ann,

Welcome to TransPulse. I'm glad you've come!

 

Thank you for sharing your story.

 

Lots of love and a big welcome hug ,

Timber Wolf?

[Jani]

Hello Kali-Ann and welcome to the forum!   Thank you for sharing your story.  It seems your life is going well and that's great!  Please join in the conversation.  I'm sure you have lots of experiences to share. 

 

Cheers, Jani

[Carolyn Marie]

Welcome to Trans Pulse, Kali-Ann.  That was a very inspiring story, and I want to thank you for sharing it.  It's wonderful that your life has turned out the way you want it, at long last.  Most of us late transitioners have had similar difficulties, stresses and obstacles.  What's that old saying, "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger?"  I think there is a lot of truth to that.

 

I look forward to hearing more from you.  Best of luck in all things.

 

HUGS

 

Carolyn Marie

[Kali-Ann Gills]

Carolyn.

Inspiration comes from inside to be who we are. Ask justification from nobody for our existence many of us are terrified yet, that fear can be used and reflected back on some in society. 

For too long transgender people have limped through the world hiding in the shadows. I am of the belief that for the first time since ancient times we can scream NO I will no longer hide.

The ancient Greeks worshipped us as messengers of the Gods. The Egytians did the same. While the ancient gods are no more I believe that we still have a special place in the world. To be transgender is a gift not a curse; we see life from both sides, unique in our insight.

???Kali-Ann xxx

1 hour ago, Carolyn Marie said:

Welcome to Trans Pulse, Kali-Ann.  That was a very inspiring story, and I want to thank you for sharing it.  It's wonderful that your life has turned out the way you want it, at long last.  Most of us late transitioners have had similar difficulties, stresses and obstacles.  What's that old saying, "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger?"  I think there is a lot of truth to that.

 

I look forward to hearing more from you.  Best of luck in all things.

 

HUGS

 

Carolyn Marie

 

[Charlize]

Welcome Kali-Ann,

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

[tracy_j]

Hi Kali-Ann,

 

Welcome ?

 

Tracy

[Kali-Ann Gills]

23 hours ago, Timber Wolf said:

Hi Kali-Ann,

Welcome to TransPulse. I'm glad you've come!

 

Thank you for sharing your story.

 

Lots of love and a big welcome hug ,

Timber Wolf?

???