Subtle tests

[Ashley1]

Whether you are MTF or FTM What kind of subtle tests did you use to realize your gender identity in your mind before you saw a therapist. 

[VickySGV]

There really are no subtle tests for GD.  The word Dysphoria means Terrible Burden and that is not subtle in any way.  If you are over 13 which is our lower age for membership here, you have already tested yourself many times.  If you even think you are Trans, you are not the opposite which is  Cis, you are some level of Trans, but maybe not the fully transitioning kind.

 

The three tests though are :

Has your feeling that you could be Trans persisted in you for more than just a few days.  If it is only once or twice in your lifetime as a fantasy, it probably has not be persistent.

 

Has your feeling that you could be Trans been consistent that  you change from the gender you were assigned at birth, or does it flip flop constantly?  Some days you want to be male and others female?  If the it flip flops, you may be Gender Fluid, which is still a form of Trans.

 

Has your feeling that you could be Trans become insistent and grows daily in the urgency you feel to live in  the gender opposite of the one you were assigned at birth.  Does the feeling interfere with your life and you relations with people?  

 

It is the opposite of subtlety that marks all of this.  They are all heavily dysphoric if you have them.  If they are subtle, you may still need to see a therapist. 

[Jani]

Cis gender people do not question their gender.  Its a foreign concept to do so.  

 

You can go to a therapist for one or two appointments to see what they offer in regards to your situation.  It can't hurt and it may certainly help provide some clarity. 

 

Jani

[Michelle_Anne]

On 8/28/2018 at 2:49 AM, VickySGV said:

There really are no subtle tests for GD.  The word Dysphoria means Terrible Burden and that is not subtle in any way.  If you are over 13 which is our lower age for membership here, you have already tested yourself many times.  If you even think you are Trans, you are not the opposite which is  Cis, you are some level of Trans, but maybe not the fully transitioning kind.

 

The three tests though are :

Has your feeling that your could be Trans persisted in you for more than just a few days.  If it is only once or twice in your lifetime as a fantasy, it probably has not be persistent.

 

Has your feeling that you could be Trans been consistent that  you change from the gender you were assigned at birth, or does it flip flop constantly?  Some days you want to be male and others female?  If the it flip flops, you may be Gender Fluid, which is still a form of Trans.

 

Has your feeling that you could be Trans become insistent and grows daily in the urgency you feel to live in  the gender opposite of the one you were assigned at birth.  Does the feeling interfere with your life and you relations with people?  

 

It is the opposite of subtlety that marks all of this.  They are all heavily dysphoric if you have them.  If they are subtle, you may still need to see a therapist. 

I started looking up some of these questions and others and had checked the yes box to a lot of them.  It definitely intensified my feelings to the point I got up the courage to see out a therapist and try and figure the next steps for me. Joining this site has helped a lot also. 

[claire1000]

I knew since childhood in the fifties that something was wrong and I tried all the tricks to avoid dealing with those feelings, marriage, job and alcoholism. It was not until the death of my wife and finally breaking down with a grief therapist that I finally told someone how I felt. She guided me to someone in her practice who had experience with transgender issues that Iwas finally able to start addressing my issues that have now led to me living full time as a woman. I don't know if I will be able to have GCS because of heart, and diabetic issues but I know I am as happy as I have ever been now living as I have felt I should have been. I will finish with this address your feelings with a therapist because if you are trully transgender then those feelings are not going to go away, save yourself from a life of denial because it is  never to late to be happy with your life.

[Michelle F]

Here Here!

 

Once I became the last of my family line I decided to make the change. Being a Chef and Pro musician, nobody really questioned me.

 

I could dress neutrality in both professions.

I play aggressive bass with heavy melodic structure and keyboards with classical/synth/techno/trance influences. When mesmerized by music one tends to blur sexuality so I was safe. Always had an exit. Backstage or the kitchen. Always safe...

 

Last May I came out on my Birthday on the 28th! I have presented as female ever since and by July 12th all my legal ID says Michelle and female. Even my SS card, birth certificate and drivers license.

 

I am Michelle! 

A woman!

 

I feel tested everyday I walk out the door. I concentrate on how I walk and what words I choose. Did I miss a spot shaving? Did the cut this morning stop bleeding. Can you see the spot I nicked? Is my makeup straight. OMG is it a fright mask? Too much... too little...
 

OMG... Constantly questioning and reevaluating all while keeping my head held high, my feet on the ground with one in front of the other and a smile on my face and in my heart!

 

On an on ad infinitum!

 

So yeah... I feel tested ?

Whew!

[Michelle F]

Hmmm... Did I pass the tests?

 

Jury still out on that...

 

...to be continued

[Jani]

I think you passed the audition!  

[Michelle F]

ROFLMAO!

?

[Jani]

? You're the best Michelle! 

[Michelle_Anne]

I have my first therapist appointment in two weeks and hopefully once I start going I can get on hormones.  One big test for me the last day or so is thinking about he hormone process. I asked myself several times if I’m ready to possibly become sterile and to start losing parts of my manhood that I’ve had all my life.  The answer was a solid yes.   I am so ready for this. 

[Jani]

In this process/journey we all get and lose attributes.  You have to decide where you need to be.  It seems you are. 

 

Jani

[claire1000]

When I started with a gender therapist I was over 60, and widowed so losing parts of my manhood was the least of my issues I just wanted to feel normal for the first time in my life.The years of faking it  until I made it were taking a toll. I had read, and heard about how HRT can change things but I must admit I was dubious at this late stage of life. Though the physical changes have been slow the emotional changes have been well worth it, I now look forward to the day instead of just trying to exist and get through the days. A grief therapist who got me to go to a gender therapist told me to" spill my guts out" which I did with many tears I would recommend you do the same .Yes there are things you can lose but you can gain so much more.