I forgot my name ?

[SugarMagnolia]

It's been a busy day today. I did some canvasing for a friend of mine that is running for office. That went great but ended up taking 5 hours instead of 2. Then, after a quick change, I headed up to the laundromat that my wife and I own. I only go up to the laundromat in guy mode because it's a small, "traditional" town and they only know me as male, so it's easier until we sell it in the next few months, hopefully.

Anyway...I had to wait on a few things at the laundromat and so I wandered over to a nearby sandwich shop that sells good beer. I know the owner and it's always nice to catch up and chit chat a bit. While I was there his mom came in, who I had never met before, and we struck up a conversation.

At some point, she introduced herself and said, "My name's Becky". And then I drew a blank! I started to say, "Julie" and realized that was wrong, but it took me a couple of beats to remember my guy name...you know the one I used for 51 years?

She didn't notice anything, but I thought it was an interesting milestone to be getting so comfortable with "Julie" as a first name that I couldn't immediately remember my old name. ?

Has anyone else had that happen or am I just a ditz today?

Julie

[Jani]

Well you may be a ditz but it does happen to all of us!   I used a nickname I picked out when I was 10 for 51 years.  It was hard hearing my birth name at first and my ears always perked up if I heard my "old" name while in public.  That's gone now.  I don't react at all to hearing it any longer.  

 

Julie, you could always blame it on having a "senior moment"!

 

Jani 

[SugarMagnolia]

LOL, Jani. Yes, I could! I did get my first AARP card this last year when I past 50, so I might as well get some mileage out of the excuses. ?

[Carolyn Marie]

That's a great, funny story, Julie.  Yes, its happened to me in various different ways.  It is hard to unlearn a name that's been yours for, in my  my case, 57 years.  But I get reminded of my dead name often enough to never get completely away from it.  I still get junk mail in his name, and a couple of utility bills that I've just never gotten around to changing.

 

That's one area where I really envy young trans folk.  The amount of baggage one accumulates increases exponentially, so by the time you're in your 40's changing names become a VERY big deal, indeed.  Wait until you have to go see Social Security; you'll see what I mean.

 

Carolyn Marie

[Cyndee]

The old name it just fades into dis-use, for us that have been around a while it never really goes away completely as Carolyn alludes to above. The old name looses most if not all of it's significance, I so get this post, when I hear the old name in a crowd, I don't react, it's lost it's significance. I think as we move into our preferred life, we end up at at times seeing these ghosts of the past on display on that utility bill you never changed, sometimes you can hear it call out to you from a different time, it can be an indicator of how far you have traveled. Unlike the many computers, and data bases, our minds want to prioritize this data element, that process of name value on display as you search for it yourself before speaking. I can't recall those times I've had to mutter the old name myself in recent times, mostly it's using that word for someone else.

 

C -

[Kirsten]

Haha. That’s too funny. I haven’t had the joy of forgetting my “old” name yet. But I am finally to the point that I respond when people call me Kirsten 100% of the time. That took a while on its own. And I do stop and think every time I have to introduce myself as to what name I tell people. It’s been more and more Kirsten and less Michael. Guess I better get used to that ASAP since in a couple weeks I’ll only be Kirsten. ?

[SugarMagnolia]

3 hours ago, CyndiRae said:

I can't recall those times I've had to mutter the old name myself in recent times, mostly it's using that word for someone else.

That's like poetry CyndiRae!

I can't recall those times
I've had to mutter the old name myself
In recent times, mostly
It's using that word for someone else