Next step...

[Nicks1]

Hi guys, looking for some advice. Im starting to feel more and more male everyday since my last post and definitely 100% certain im FTM and need to figure out what steps comes next, truth is i have no idea what to do next. Im in the UK, Wales in particular. Iv come out to my partner but nobody else, iv researched probably everything i need too, but i just have no idea what to do next - do i go to the doctors first, do i change my name, or do i change my name first then go to the doctors, do i start binding first then go to the doctors?

 

I literally have no idea what i need to do next. At the moment thats probably the one thing thats stressing me out most. So just wondering if anyone can help point me in the right direction please or tell me what route you took and if it worked or didnt work, if you regretted doing something before something else please. 

 

Thank you

[JJ]

It's actually a highly individual decision with guys doing all of the above. I've heard there can be a wait in the UK so you may want to go ahead and schedule your Dr so it doesn't hold you up.

Then ask yourself what is most important to you. There is no right or wrong way. Just please be very careful binding - it is dangerous and will ultimately cause problems.

 

It also depends to some extent th om the reactions in your family and community and how you feel about that. If it's a conservative area or you will harassment it may be good to wait to dress and cut your hair male. If it's an accepting area or you dont care about repercussions you can start dressing male now.

It takes at least a year usually for you to really start being gendered correctly. It's a slow process just like puberty. And you never know what you are going to get when. I was unusual in that I got 100% correctly gendered in 8 months but not so unusual in it taking 5 years for my beard to be thick enough to grow out.

But more important than appearance is male body language and mannerisms. This time of waiting and change is a great time to work on those. Men communicate primarily non- verbally and though I was a social worker and very aware of body language I had no idea just how much men do communicate that way.

Good luck with however you decide to start. It is a challenging, exciting and amazing journey.

Johnny

[Nicks1]

Thank you iv been thinking the same about the DRs, im very sceptical about binding. I often work long shifts and on my feet that whole time so i feel id rather not be sore, constricted and risk my health.

 

im in a position where i can comfortably be transgender and also feel inside that i dont care what people think, if people cant accept me for who i really am then they dont deserve a place in my life (i say that very thankful). I just sit and wonder what i should do next most days and nights. Im guessing its normal to wonder, but i dont have any transgender people around me to even ask for advice. ?

im guessing itll all come in time - baby steps ?

[Leo]

Putting pressure on yourself to decide what to do next will only stress you out more.  It is better to just relax and trust that the right decision will come at the right time.   Following a continuum from Female to MOC to Butch, to Male allowed me to live the life without a lot of the hassle. I was becoming more and more masculine in my presentation and behavior  and no one seemed to notice because it took place gradually over time.  However, I have not done any medical transition. It has been enough for me to pass as male and get gendered as male nearly 100% of the time.  

 

As JJ mentioned there are problems to binding.  I have never done so and it is possible to pass as male without a binder.  Also, before you consider top surgery check out the photos of the results based on your chest size and see what may be possible for you. 

 

Leo