Journey to Jane Shannon

[tracy_j]

I like the idea of the closet Jane. When I think about it it's quite true. My partner used to say about hanging clothes. She does not go so far as to hang mine but I do hang far more now. A difference from years ago lol.

 

Tracy

[Janeshannon]

Thank you all for the amazing replies to my recent posts. I love posting here, and I feel I'm not very good about responding. 

 

As I reflect upon the replies to my closet post, I think the importance of openly hanging my clothes was losing the secret. My wife sees it as lying, I cannot bring myself to call it a lie. The whole process became an exercise in her showing me acceptance, and me showing her I trust her with shedding the secret. While the process of coming out to seriously start transition is hugely challenging, having people who accept you makes it seems much more achievable. 

[Janeshannon]

Big coming out today!  This morning I told my sons, 11 and 9, that I am transgender.  We chatted with them for about 20 minutes.  Prior to talking my wife and I agreed the most important message from them to take away was that we both love them, and nothing will change that.  I think we were successful at this.  We let them know who they could talk to, but that they shouldn't talk to others about this until we let them know.  My youngest responded as expected, he hugged me and asked if he could go back to his Legos.  My oldest cried, but we think that was in response to upcoming changes and not me directly.  The next step is to start adding feminine presentation to them at home.  I think this is important for all four of us.  We will all get a chance to get more comfortable with me openly presenting as a woman.

 

[Susan R]

Congrats on this monumental step @Janeshannon.  You're moving right along now.  You must be feeling some relief from the tension and wondering how they might handle this news.  I wish you and your family the very best.

 

Warmest Regards,

Susan R?

[Charlize]

It sounds like you and your wife are handling your transition in such a positive manner.  Telling our children is difficult but apart from some tears the fact that love will be there for them is just right.  Enjoy that family as you find comfort as a woman.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

[Janeshannon]

Very interesting morning so far. As I stated above I came out to my children last week. During the conversation my wife told them I would be slowly wearing and looking more girly. To that end I have started wearing women's shorts around the house. I have also begun developing a list (attached below) of girly things I could do to slowly change my presentation. The purpose of this is to get my whole family (including me) accustomed to me presenting as a woman. One great suggestion my counselor had was to put some of the items on Post It notes, so the boys can select some of them. I could use some help adding to the list. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Please try to break the suggestion down to small details. For example, I changed eye makeup to mascara, eyeliner, and eyeshadow. My goal would be to present full time in late June 2020. 

 

Here's the list (in no particular order):

women's pants/shorts
practice voice
name and pronouns 
nightgown/shirt
lipstick 
bralette under shirt
bra with breatforms
women's tops
skirts
mascara 

eyeliner 

eyeshadow 

eyebrows 
pant toe nails
jewelry 
shoes

[Charlize]

A couple of more list items.  They may take you out of the home as well if not discrete.

 

Eyebrow shaping

ear piercing

finger nail....clear polish....professional manicure

 

More will come as you find yourself.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

[Janeshannon]

Thanks Charlize,

I added eyebrow shaping and tinting to the list. I pierced my ears over a year ago, but I was thinking I could wear more feminine earrings as part of this. 

 

I'm a teacher, and my plan is to go full time at the end of the next school year. I think I should schedule a spa day to get my makeup, nails, and hair done to mark going full time. 

[Jani]

5 hours ago, Janeshannon said:

mascara 

eyeliner 

eyeshadow

These seemed to be important when I started but I realized mascara and eyeliner are touch and go depending upon what I'm doing.  I don't bother for everyday activities.  As far as eye shadow I only apply it when gong out special like a wedding or such.  My best advise is to look around and see what other woman are doing while out doing everyday activities.  You don't want to stand out too much by being over made up.  

[Janeshannon]

Jani,

I actually don't really like eyeshadow that much either. I do think it can be a fun and useful skill. The purpose of it here is do something feminine in front of my family. My thought is the list would be additive. For example, I'm wearing women's shorts in front of them right now. I don't plan on stopping; instead I plan adding things. So if the next thing is lipstick I'd wear shorts and lipstick. 

[Charlize]

Here is one more for the list......Shaving legs, arms or other particularly male hairy spots.

 

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

[Janeshannon]

Just a quick photo today. I'm taking the last two classes for my Masters Degree in Teaching. I headed to the University of Washington Bothell campus to study. It is a bit of a dream come true. I walked out the door of my house, after farewelling my spouse, parked off campus, walk about 3/4 of a mile, and now I'm in their library. I'm terrible at selfies, but here it is...

[Charlize]

Your selfie is just fine.  Looking good.

I got my masters in education as well.  I studied to be a shop teacher but some of the education classes were taken by a group of cosmetologists.  Kind of a pity i was trying so hard to man up at the time.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

[Jani]

You look great Jane.  And your selfie is good too, composed nicely.  Your program is getting close to the end.  Wonderful!

 

Hugs,
Jani 

[Susan R]

Very nice Jane Shannon.  You can see your confidence blossoming.  Congratulations in advance on getting your Masters soon.  That's will be a huge achievement.  You're looking very good my friend!

 

Susan R?.

[Janeshannon]

Today was a wonderful first.  I had my first hair appointment as a woman.  It was so nice to be in the salon, chatting, and being treated kindly and taken care of.  She trimmed about 1 to 1.5 inches off my hair (it is mid shoulder length) and framed my face a little  But the real treat was at the end she asked if I wanted some curls, and I said yes.  For the first time ever my hair looked feminine and maybe even cute.  I makes me a little sad realizing this is what I have missed for all these years, but it makes me happy knowing this is my future.

 

[Ellora]

3 hours ago, Janeshannon said:

first hair appointment as a woman

Yay! Congratulations! Thank must be such a wonderful feeling! I get a little nervous having any of my long hair trimmed, unless I know the hairdresser, but to go as a woman, I would be in heaven. Great to hear you had a great experience and time!

[Cyndee]

7 hours ago, Janeshannon said:

Today was a wonderful first.  I had my first hair appointment as a woman.  It was so nice to be in the salon, chatting, and being treated kindly and taken care of.  She trimmed about 1 to 1.5 inches off my hair (it is mid shoulder length) and framed my face a little  But the real treat was at the end she asked if I wanted some curls, and I said yes.  For the first time ever my hair looked feminine and maybe even cute.  I makes me a little sad realizing this is what I have missed for all these years, but it makes me happy knowing this is my future.

 

 

Very nice Jane, and happy to read this 

 

Best to you

 

Cyndee -

[Jani]

Jane I'm happy you've experienced this as it is enjoyable.  

 

Hugs, Jani

[Janeshannon]

I started HRT today at 6pm.  I have a huge feeling of relief that all of this finally truly started, and I feel excitement for the changes that are coming.  I have dreamed of this for years now.  I always felt its inevitability, but being in the closet filled me with dread over the whole coming out process.  Overall coming out has been a wonder process, and I start this chapter with no feeling of dread or doubt.  

 

Today is the first day of the rest of my life!!!

 

[Ellora]

6 hours ago, Janeshannon said:

I started HRT today at 6pm.  I have a huge feeling of relief that all of this finally truly started, and I feel excitement for the changes that are coming.  I have dreamed of this for years now.  I always felt its inevitability, but being in the closet filled me with dread over the whole coming out process.  Overall coming out has been a wonder process, and I start this chapter with no feeling of dread or doubt.  

 

Today is the first day of the rest of my life!!!

 

Congratulations!!! It truly is a wonderful feeling! Like a huge weight lifted off of the soul. Enjoy!!

[Kirsten]

Congratulations Jane. It is a hard road we take, but one full of excitement! Good luck to you on your upcoming chapter. ?

[Jani]

Very good Jane.  Enjoy!!

[Susan R]

14 hours ago, Janeshannon said:

Today is the first day of the rest of my life!!!

Another milestone to be proud of, Janeshannon.  I'm sure we'll soon be reading happy updates here to your upcoming changes both physically and emotionally.  Enjoy the results!

 

Thanks for sharing your good news,

Susan R?

[Janeshannon]

13 hours ago, Kirsten said:

Congratulations Jane. It is a hard road we take, but one full of excitement! Good luck to you on your upcoming chapter. ?

Thanks Kirsten, 

I really loved your story, and found it inspiring. It showed you can transition, while balancing family and career.  

Take care, 

Jane Shannon