vent

[BrandenLeon]

so i was explaining to my friend that i am trans. and she said i can't be do to the fact i don't want to do anything sexual to women. i can date a women just fine, but when it comes the sexual interaction. i get scared. mainly do the fact i was abuse and raped repeatedly by a friend whom was a women form the time spand 2010 to 2012. and some home abuse that happened when i live with my family when i was younger. this has made me scared of sexual interaction with men and women, but i want to try to have that relationship with my fiancee. it scares me to. 

 

i just feel like that is a big slap in my face. to insult someone that is a friend. and tell you can't be this do to sexual abuse and trauma. it kinda made me feel terrible last night when she said that me.

i just feel terrible now do this fact. maybe feeling this way is just all in my head. 

 

*sighs*

i just need to get this out of my head to help me clam down. 

 

thank you for reading. advice is much needed.

 

 

 

 

[VickySGV]

The sexuality of Trans people is all over the map.  Being Trans is a matter of identity and not sexuality.  Trite phrase is "Being Trans is who you want to go to bed AS, and not who you want to go to bed WITH. 

 

I can relate to problems of intimacy and trust getting in your way of enjoying touch and physical involvement with people based on the abuse you describe. With good counseling that can be helped.

 

I consider myself as Demi-Sexual which means that I must build up a whole ton of trust in a person who can be any sex orientation,  before any thoughts of intimacy or sexual involvement even start forming, but the person I will find that trust with is not limited to one sex or the other.

 

Getting a therapist who has experience with both Gender and Sexual abuse issues is going to be a first need for you to start moving forward with this.  If you have a therapist, your next session should be learning how to ignore your "big mouth and no sense" acquaintance who frankly has no idea what they are talking about. .

[Tessa]

This is interesting to me. I never thought of it that way. I love to go to bed as Tessa. I put on a nightgown and snuggle into my covers. I hold my pillow next to me as if I’m being cuddled. I love it! I feel I’m the right body at night. I even where my wig sometimes to bed. 

 

I had my company change my name for a while to Tessa and since I have a phone job they let me use it on the phone. But none of the customers believed I was female and it began to bother me. So I changed my name back to my male name. 

 

I’m not brave enough to wear all woman’s clothes at work although my work would not care if I did as long as they were appropriate. For now I wear intimates under my clothes and try to wear unisex colors. 

 

When I get home it’s all Tessa. I stay in woman’s clothes till I get up in the morning. I’m not ready for HRT or surgery at this point but I dream of being a woman!  I actually dream of it a lot! 

 

Tessa is a beautiful sexy intelligent woman I just wish I could have her fully come out! 

 

Tessa?‍?