-
Who's Online 10 Members, 0 Anonymous, 93 Guests (See full list)
- Mirrabooka
- Charlize
- Ashley0616
- Maddee
- KathyLauren
- KatieSC
- Karen Carey
- Mars Hiroshi
- MaybeRob
- AllieJ
-
Recently Browsing 0 members
- No registered users viewing this page.
-
Forum Statistics
-
Total Topics80.7k
-
Total Posts768.8k
-
-
Member Statistics
-
Total Members12,038
-
Most Online8,356
Newest Member
Justine76
Joined -
-
Today's Birthdays
-
April Marie -
daniela...
(59 years old) -
Emily May -
Felixr
(20 years old) -
Leann
(56 years old)
-
-
Posts
-
By KatieSC · Posted
While it is encouraging that they have deemed that they cannot ban the treatment, the bigger question is what treatments they will cover as a result. Speaking as a transgender female, this is a difficult definition. A fair number of insurance plans already cover the basic vaginoplasty, however, for those of us who have a rather masculine appearing face, a heavy beard, a deep voice, and other defining characteristics, attaining a passing feminine appearance is difficult without gender-affirming facial feminization surgery, genital and facial electrolysis, speech therapy and if necessary, gender affirming voice surgery, as well as other body contouring procedures. I view all of these procedures as life-saving in the sense that blending in, and thus avoiding an assault can come down to looking and sounding like you are female. I think the transgender males have a bit more ease with blending in than we do. There will be disagreements as to what constitutes enough surgery to be your truest self. We all pretty much understand that our true gender is locked in our mind. The issue is what can we do to modify our bodies enough to get the congruence between what is in our head, and how we perceive ourselves in the world. Is some of it cosmetic? That is hard to say for sure. I have had insurance companies insist that facial electrolysis is purely cosmetic. Well, most women do not have an Abraham Lincoln beard coming through. Some insurance companies have insisted that speech/voice therapy, as well as voice surgery, are purely cosmetic. I scoured the cosmetic counters for any makeup that would enhance my voice. Being feminine and passing does not mean I get to look and sound like Fred Flintstone in a dress. That kind of weirds folks out, and sets us up to be ridiculed and assaulted in my estimation. My one insurer told me that beyond the vaginoplasty that all of this was cosmetic. In an appeal hearing, I asked the group that if they had a 14 year old daughter who was in an accident that resulted in a large facial scar, would they want the child to receive the best care to remove the scar? Of course they would. I pointed out though, that while she may have the scar, she could live with it. I asked them if the removal of the disfiguring scar in a 14-year old would be difficult for the child when the other kids made fun of her. Of course, they all nodded their head. I explained to the group that for folks like us, it is no different. While it may be cosmetic to a point, these procedures are essential to our well-being, and not something we are doing to be on a YouTube channel. Now some who are trans, or gender fluid, may not want to opt for the procedures. There are quite a few of us that do, but the cost is prohibitive. What also clouds the issue are the surgeons who operate out of large medical centers who participate in the large insurance pools. How many of our sisters and brothers have had to pony up some major dollars to a surgeon who is out of network? Good luck trying to get the surgery paid for by your insurer. They may pay you what they pay the surgeons in network, but you won't get that much in reimbursement. A fair number of insurance companies balk at speech and voice therapy, and many will not cover voice surgery. Then there is the issue of electrolysis. A day at the "spa" for electrolysis with anesthetics will run around 3,000 bucks or so, and you may need many repeat visits. Many of the insurers fail to pay for that as well. Just about none of the insurers will cover body contouring procedures such as a panniculectomy, or liposuction. When the insurance companies will just help us become our truest selves, then we will have progress with gender identity laws. The one good thing that this decision does is preserve the primary care for transgender individuals. I have to wonder how Florida and the rest of the states who have banned having Medicaid cover transgender healthcare are going to act. This should be an interesting fight. When we have the ability to seek care and get what we need for our true needs, without any pre-judgements, then these court orders will mean something. A court order without parameters for the insurance companies is hollow. -
By Mirrabooka · Posted
@April MarieI just noticed that it's your birthday today! Happy Birthday to you!!!!!! 🥳🎂🎁🎉❤️ -
By Mirrabooka · Posted
Morning y'all, fingers crossed for everyone who has stuff going on. Welcome back to reality @April Marie, enjoy your improving weather! Why is it that we humans always take too long to acclimatize to the changing seasons, especially when it gets colder like it is here? Maybe I'm just getting soft in my old age, lol. -
-
-
-
-
-
-
By Heather Shay · Posted
@RiyaHello and welcome. I also live in Ohio and it is a challenge but I applaud you for knowing pretty early on and becoming who you really are. Congratulations! -
By Heather Shay · Posted
Do you feel safe in the country you now live in? -
By Heather Shay · Posted
Oooooooooooooooops, I forgot yesterday. I was thinking of a few bands who had a member invited who said no and went right into obscurity or left before the band got big. 1) Led Zeppelin - origially wanted Terry Reid to be lead vocalist and he decided the stay solo. 2) Crosby, Stills & Nash - invited John Sebastian to join before Neil Young, Sebastian said no. 3) Signe Anderson quit as lead vocalist with Jefferson Airplane and they replaced her with Grace Slick. -
By April Marie · Posted
Good morning, everyone! We're back from a short vacation with friends to the mountains of NC. It was a fun time driving the twisty mountain roads. Now it's back to reality of cutting grass, washing windows and putting in screens and putting out the porch furniture. Coming home to warmer weather than when we left is glorious. Happy Anniversary @Willow! I hope your family is feeling better @KymmieL - my wife and I shared a stomach virus several weeks ago that was horrid. Hang in there @Birdie, it will all work out!! Have a wonderful day, everyone! -
By awkward-yet-sweet · Posted
I think many Christians end up with a false dichotomy. If we didn't choose to be how we are, then something in our environment did it. Is going along with it a sin? Maybe. But if so, its one of those times where we mess something up no matter what we do. Part of the imperfect nature of this fallen world is that there are times where we'll sin no matter what we do. In a no-win scenario like that, we do the wisest thing possible with our free will. -
By EasyE · Posted
This is the crux of my anguish these many, many months (years!) and where I go back-and-forth with my own journey ... I was born a biological male. No denying that in my case. But I have a lot of internal feminine leanings and external ones, too. I prefer to wear women's clothes 100 percent of the time (if I could). I wish I had the female plumbing. I long for that badly sometimes. I don't know why or where that came from but no denying that either. I have started HRT because I like the idea of having a more feminine physical body and some of the "perks" that go with that. I just asked my doc to up my dose to the next level today! So the big question I ask myself is: am I knowingly disobeying God, who likes order and made humans male and female, by taking these steps? This is my wife's take on things. "You are sinning. You know God made you a male biologically. Yet you are willfully pursuing transition to being something God didn't intend you to be regardless of what you feel inside, what your preferences are, etc." I keep trying to tell her it's much more complex than that but sometimes I don't even know what I think... This ties up in knots and makes me angry and makes me feel stuck!!! I don't want to disobey my Creator and Savior and yet I have this strong, strong leaning toward the feminine in many ways (that keeps getting stronger and refuses to go away no matter how much I have tried to stuff it away!!) ... It feels like misery no matter which path I take - if I "give in" to the feminine, which I have been doing a lot the past 12 months or so, am I endangering my soul? Am I creating scandal? Yet the thought of putting the feminine aside feels, at times, like death too (or is it just me being self-centered and unwilling to bend the knee to my Creator who would ask me to give this up as a testament to my love for him... I don't know. I don't know. I don't know!! But sometimes I really really F***ing hate this quandary...
-
-
Upcoming Events
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now