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Dannie

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Just wanted to say hi ? my name is Dannie I am 59 M/F I’m looking forward to getting to know you all. I Finally started therapy for GID, and my therapist gave me the OK to start HRT! I am happy about it, but scared of what the future is going to be like. My wife knows I am transgender and has from the beginning of our relationship. I stopped CD a couple of years ago, it just got to depressing after 50 yrs. It felt like just another lie on top of a life of lies. I still have to lie, only my therapist and wife know am transgender. I was watching Jackie’s Couch and she mentioned this web site so here I am?

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  • Forum Moderator

Welcome Dannie.  Thanks for sharing.  Yes @jae bear (Jackie) is a big supporter of the site.  She's on quite the journey herself.  Congratulations on being able to start HRT.  I hope your wife will be all right with the changes it brings.  You will get happier as (with most of us) it will calm you down somewhat.  The physical changes will be what they are but you'll be happy with them too!  As you've seen, gender dysphoria doesn't go away and it does eventually bubble back up.  Speaking with a therapist is a good start to being honest as you sort things out.  Remember you only have to proceed as far and fast as you need to feel in control.  There are those who for family or financial reasons take low dose HRT and live their current life outside the home.  There is never any pressure here to follow any specific route.  Each journey is unique.   Please join in the conversation! 

Cheers, Jani

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  • Forum Moderator

Good to see you Dannie!

i’m so glad that you came here to the site, everyone here is absolutely amazing, I’m so glad to hear that you’re doing what it takes to take care of yourself, starting with a therapist is really and truly the best way anyone could start. I received that very information from Jani myself, and I am so grateful to her and the others for suggesting that’s where I start, it was the single best thing I ever did during my transition!

Great big hugs,

Jackie

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  • Admin

Hello, Dannie, and welcome to Trans Pulse.  There are many of us here who got the transition bug later in life, but late is better (much better) than never.  Please feel free to ask all the questions you want.  We'll do our best to answer them, and there is no question too mundane.   Congrats on HRT, and get on board the Womanhood Express!!  It's an E-ticket ride.

 

HUGS

 

Carolyn Marie

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Hello Dannie. Welcome to the site.

 

Hope to see you around.

 

Look forwald to your input.

 

 

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Welcome to the family.  I am new here and found a wonderful place to learn and open up. 
Good luck on your journey 

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  • Forum Moderator

NIce to meet you, @Dannie!  Welcome to our little community.  You and I are very close in age.  I'm sure we have some commonalities in our life histories.  Feel free to post your experiences or questions in regards to your journey.  I know I'd sure enjoy reading about them as would many here as well.  I'm glad you found us.

 

Warmest Regards,

Susan R?

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  • Posts

    • Carolyn Marie
      https://beachgrit.com/2024/04/tolerance-on-the-ropes-as-transgender-surfer-refused-entry-into-womens-division-of-longboard-contest/     Same old same old.  How will the Cis-girl surfers feel about trans men participating in their events, I wonder?   Carolyn Marie
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    • RaineOnYourParade
      happy trans birthday! I can't speak personally on the subject, but I hope hormones bring you the changes you're looking for <3 
    • MaeBe
      That’s super healthy, to see that something that becomes common has less effect on you and that you are able to decipher these feelings.   Sadly, this trend tends to only deaden good feelings as we tend not to let bad feelings attenuate the same way.   I have noticed less euphoria, but still feel the dysphorias that I have. Sometimes the good sneaks in and reminds me, but often time it’s just me seeing myself in the mirror and being comfortable about what I see when embracing my realized self. I may not get the same buzz I once did, but I don’t feel incongruous when looking at a more “drab” reflection.    Wishing you strength, you are amazing!
    • KayC
      Congratulations! and Happy Trans Birthday @LittleSam! That is such a BIG milestone.  I can still remember walking out of my clinic with my first HRT presciption.  I was on Cloud-9.  Wishing you all the best in the start of your new Journey!
    • missyjo
      maebe thank you I try to be. I thank God for blessings, try to share them, beg forgiveness for my shortcomings n vow to try to do better...2 priests have said no, God doesn't condemn you just for being trans...but apparently evangelicals do   I shall vtry dear thank you  
    • MaeBe
      Meet him at the being good to others part of Christianity. At the heart of it, there are excellent tenets of the faith. Those that condemn are judging, Jesus would have us be selfless; stone casting and all that. Are you a good person? Are you putting good into the world? If your gender is an issue for God, let God judge. In the mortal realm, let your actions be heard. 
    • missyjo
      and just fi sweeten it..I'm catholic n he hasn't been for years..he's evangelical..whatever that is
    • MaeBe
      Let’s stick to cite-able fact. Most of my posts have been directly in relation to LGBTQ+ rights as it pertains to P2025 and I have drawn direct links between people, their quotes, and their agenda. I have made reference to the cronyism that P2025 would entail as well, by gutting, not cutting, broad swathes of government and replacing it with “conservative warriors” (I can get you the direct quote, but rest assured it’s a quote). All this does is constantly force the cogs to be refitted, not their movement. To say that agencies have directly defied a President is a bit much, the EPA did what Trump told them to do at the direct harm to the environment, the department of agriculture did the same by enacting the administrations forced move to KC which decimated the USDA.      How about Betsy DeVoss for Education? Or Bannon for anything? What about the revolving Chief of Staff position that Trump couldn’t stay filled? Or the Postmaster General, who did much to make the USPS worse?   Let’s not mix politics with racism, sexism, or any other ism. Because Trump made mainly white, male, appointments—many of them not, arguably, people fit for service—or unwilling to commit to term. I can argue this because, again, he’s up for election and will do what he did before (and more of the same, his words).   Please delineate how the selected diversity appointments have negatively affected the US, other than being black, women, or queer? Representation matters and America benefits when its people are inspired and empowered.
    • missyjo
      ok ladies if I've asked this before I'm sorry please delete    ok so I have 2vsiblings..one is overly religious..n preachy n domineering..so he keeps trying to talk with me n I'd like to..but he always falls into this all knowing all wise domineering preachy thing tjaz tells me he's praying for christ to beat Satan for control of my soul..which is doomed to hell bc I'm transgender    I'd like to try to have a civil conversation n try to set him strait n gsin a cooperation n real conversation    any suggestions?
    • missyjo
      abigail darling what about extensions or a wig? be brave n hang in there  to thine own self be true  good luck
    • RaineOnYourParade
      When I first started figuring things out, I got a lot more euphoria. Every time a friend would use he/they pronouns for me, I'd get this bubbly feeling, and seeing myself look masculine made me really happy. Dysphoric state felt more normal, so I guess I noticed the pain it caused me less.   Now, it's more just that my pronouns and such things feel natural, and dysphoria is a lot stronger -- I know what's natural, so experiencing the opposite is more jarring than everything. The problem is, most of my natural experiences are from friends, and I rarely get properly gendered by strangers, much less by my family. I've found myself unable to bind in months due to aches, colds,, and not wanting to risk damage.    It partially makes me want to go back to the beginning of my journey, because at least then I got full euphoria. I'm pretty sure it'll be like this until I medically transition, or at the very least get top surgery (you know all those trans dudes online with tiny chests? Not me, unfortunately). It's a bit depressing, but at least I know that, eventually, there's a way out of this.
    • RaineOnYourParade
      Major mood, right here ^^^    I've listened to Lumineers to a long time (a major portion of it by osmosis via my mom), so that is almost painfully relatable
    • RaineOnYourParade
      As for getting a button-up/formal pants suit, you can try to talk to her more -- Cis women in tuxes have worn tuxes in recent years, after all, (for example, Zendaya) so it can still be a relatively safe topic. For jumpsuits, I'd recommend going with a simple one with a blazer, if you can -- this'll make it look overall more masculine. There's a lot of good brands, but going for one without a lot of extra glitz on it will make it look less feminine under a blazer. I don't know many specific brands though since I usually just get my stuff from chain stores, sorry :<   When it comes to your hair, if you can't cut it, you can look up tutorials on fluffing it up instead. If you can pull it off, it can look a lot shorter and more androgynous instead!
    • RaineOnYourParade
      As far as I'm aware, he wasn't -- he just sometimes wore skirts, which was why it was a question in the first place.   In my opinion, part of that is because of the way press spares attention on issues like that. As a bit of a true crime nut and what I see: Child predator cases' (and cases of a sexual nature in general) press focus on those with an AMAB perpetrator generally, and very rarely are AFAB perpetrators given much press time or even getting tried due to a whole bunch of issues I'm not gonna get into. Because of this, when you see these types of cases and a boy is the victim, it's almost always a queer person who is the one who committed a crime that gets press. Therefore, with the amount of cases seen with this type of perpetrator (and due to the fact "99% of queer people are not sexual criminals" doesn't attract eyes), the human brain can kind of naturally makes an association with it. It's not right, but it's also a fault I think falls partially on the media.   That's all my opinion, though!   This is extra confusing to me, as a feminine man is usually viewed as gay. If someone is refusing the acknowledge the existence of trans people, then gay would be the societal connection that comes after, I think. So, that sorta implies that trans women wouldn't be interested in women in the first place by those assumptions? Of course, trans lesbians exist (most trans women I know like women, actually), but it's a little ridiculous to me that people will deny trans people's existence, call all feminine AMAB people gay, and say that trans people are looking to peep all in the same breath.   Wow, this was a lot longer of a response than I was planning to write--
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