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Thoughts on passing:


A. Dillon

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I am lucky enough to essentially pass with just a haircut and a binder, since I love really bulky clothes anyway and have enough men's size xxl shirts to fill an entire closet. The only problems I really have are my height (5'4" when I'm lying) and my voice. When I don't pass, it can make me really depressed and constantly worried that someone will think of me as a masc lesbian (which multiple people have thought I am). However, I really love singing, and joined my school's choir this year, which starts up in a month. I don't know if I will be okay being heard as a girl, and I am freaking out a bit. I mean, my voice isn't anywhere near a soprano, but it is just not low enough to pass. I hate when things like this get in the way of me following my passions, but I don't want to force myself. Any thoughts?

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The best advice I can give is to talk to your teacher in private or send an email. I recently rediscovered the glory of flat bill hats, in fact I am wearing one right now haha. Sadly I am mistaking for a buch lesbian all the time but only when I am not wearing my hoodie. 

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Love butch lesbians and have appreciation for them, but I am not one haha. I wish I could just get myself a he/him button or something. 

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I was talking to this friend of someone I knew who was part of the gsa at my school, and when I said that I was trans and bi, he said, "Don't wear too much flannel or your lesbian side will take over."

 

1) Yes, I do wear too much flannel, but it is really comfy

2) Wrong way! I struggle so much so much to pass, and now it looks like I am on estrogen (which, I technically am, but I'd rather not be)

 

I agree that anyone of any gender should be able to dress however they want, but it just makes it so much harder for people to trans guys seriously because they say "oh, you're just a tomboy"

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But do you guys have any advice on trying to deepen your voice? I have been working on it for a few weeks, and it is going pretty well, but sometimes I am talking too fast to check myself and sound like a 10 year old boy.

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I would assume its the opposite of achieving a female voice.  Try and talk from way down in your chest.

 

I would gladly have swapped my old voice for what you have now i reckon. But it does take lots of time and pratise to get to a point where your happy.  Ive been talking in a female tone so much for the past 5 years that i cannot even recall or mimic what more voice sounded like way back then.  imagine a cross between Terry Mcann in Minder and Delboy Trotter. in Only fools and horses. I had a double hill to climb. Not only did i talk in a deep South/East London accent i also had to change the way i spoke. So im now right chuffed with the results.. But as i say it did take me a good few years to get it as i wanted.

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I just talk from the chest and try not to get overly wacky with my inflections. talking in a monotone would be unnatural for me but I try to be less...melodic with my speaking voice. It was a conscious effort on my part to remember to do that but now that I'm on T, talking from the chest is easier/more natural and I find it harder to raise my pitch. My voice breaks if I sing along with high parts on songs now. It's pretty funny

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