Hello, how’s it going!

[corbeau]

Hi! Nice to meet you.

 

I guess you can call me Kris. I’m AFAB, currently identifying as non-binary/demi-girl, but I’m thinking I might be genderfluid. Having a bit of a crisis tbh, haha.

 

I’ve been using she/her and they/them pronouns since the summer, after some questioning, but lately I’ve realized that sometimes - not often but getting more frequent, I think? - I feel like a guy. I realized it during the summer, actually, in a car coming back from my cottage. I suddenly felt a really strong “I’m a guy” and, well, been confused ever since.

 

As of writing this I feel like a boy, and I’d really like to be called Kris, which is not my birth name. I mean, I’d be fine with it no matter what gender feels right in the moment, but I’m kind of disliking my birth name right now so, yeah. While writing this (right after kind of venting to a very understanding friend) I’m feeling more secure with genderfluid, but I’m still not sure. 
 

I think, no matter what, unless I start feeling masculine much much more often, I’m going to stick with she/her and they/them and my birth name, just because it’s easier and usually what I’m comfortable with (and they/them is comfortable all the time, anyway.) Even if I stick with genderfluid, since the periods of feeling like a guy aren’t all that frequent, it’s better to stick to the assigned name and pronouns. 
 

My friends all know I’m nb, but my parents don’t - they’re okay with trans people but only accept mtf and ftm. It’s fine bc usually I’m comfortable with she/her, but when I’m feeling like I do right now, I guess I’m just going to have to tough it out until it passes.

 

I’m honestly just a little confused, and maybe kind of scared / freaked out about this whole gender thing. I wish it could be easier.

 

Anyway, I’m not here to type out my whole life story haha. Again, I’m Kris, nice to meet you all, and I’m happy to be here! I’m sorry as I probably won’t be very active, but I’ll try my best. : )

 

(oh, also, my username is just the French word for crow, bc they’re my favourite animals, and I wasn’t sure what name to use...so I went with neither.)

[Sandra6sandy9sand]

Hi Kris and welcome. I’m in my 70’s and it has taken me a long time to figure out who I am. I have learned a great deal from the wonderful people here.

 

Take your time and enjoy the journey.

 

Hugs

 

Sandra

[Jackie C.]

Salutations Kris!

 

My birth name makes me queasy too. What were your parents thinking, right? There was (she's off to college now) a young person in my support group that felt much like you do. They kept their hair short and just dressed how they felt that day. All they wanted to do was to change their name too. Honestly, they were delightful. Easily one of my favorite people from that collection of lost souls.

 

So yeah, no judging here. If you feel masculine some days and feminine others, go for it. Depending on how good your presentation is, you might get static from the general public, but good friends will address you appropriately for how you feel.

 

In the meantime, you might find an appointment with a qualified gender therapist helpful in sorting out your feelings. I've found all my appointments to be very positive experiences. There's plenty here to explore, so feel free to poke around. We're glad to have you!

 

Hugs!

[Timber Wolf]

Hi Kris,

Welcome to Transpulse. I'm glad you're here!

 

My best advice is to take it slow and relax. There's no rush to put a label on yourself. Take your time to learn about yourself. Maybe see a gender therapist. I found taking time to get to know myself without rushing things helped a lot.

 

Lots of love and a big welcome hug, 

Timber Wolf ?

[corbeau]

Hello and thank you, everyone!

 

Yeah, I’m a bit of an impatient person, but this is something you can’t rush. Seeing a gender therapist sounds like a very good idea - I’ll see what I can do there.

 

Nice to meet you and glad to be here!

[ShawnaLeigh]

Welcome Kris and I loved your post.  It was fun to read and follow.  I’m not saying what your feeling is a game or a joke.  It is not.  We take everyone very serious about how they feel. 
I am glad you are here.  
Good Luck! 

[gennee]

Hi Kris and welcome to the site.