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Think I maybe transgender


Claire 1960

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Hello people    I am nearly 60 and lived my life as a Male. However when I was about 9 used to sneak  in my mothers room a and try on some of the cloths. When puberty came i felt i wanted to be a girl. I got married but the feelings just got suppressed. I got divorced in 2011. I met my new partner in 2010 and 3 months ago told I wanted to be  a woman.  She has supported me totally

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Salutations Claire!

 

Welcome to the community! I hope we can help you find what you're looking for. Poke around and feel free to ask questions. We're only here to help.

 

Hugs!

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Sadly I will only be  closet  my family would not approve     I want to be a woman so much but sadly it will never happen 

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That's unfortunate. The closet is warm and safe, but it's also dark, and there are spiders.

 

Still, never say never. There's always hope and the light at the end of the tunnel isn't always a train. Your partner is supportive, and that's huge! Take comfort in that.

 

Hugs!

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40 minutes ago, Claire 1960 said:

Sadly I will only be  closet  my family would not approve     I want to be a woman so much but sadly it will never happen 

Welcome to our community Claire. It’s nice to have you but it’s difficult to read about the suppression you’ve put on yourself all these years.  I took a chance of losing everything including my wife and family when I finally decided to live my life to its fullest.  I suppressed it for 22 years before deciding to refocus.  It was worth it for me.  Before you close yourself off completely, why not take yourself and your partner to a counselor with a gender focus if at all possible.  This may give you a completely different perspective.  You could be missing out on a wonderful journey with them. Remember, it’s your life to live...no one else’s.

 

Warmest Regards,

Susan R?

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45 minutes ago, Claire 1960 said:

Sadly I will only be  closet  my family would not approve     I want to be a woman so much but sadly it will never happen 

I thought the same thing.  Everyone I have told has been accepting and supportive.  Except my mother.  My wife (mostly) siblings kids work everyone.  
This includes 4 of the biggest toughest long beard lumberjack looking male friends of mine.  Which frankly blew me away.  
You will never know for sure until to tell them.  If they reject you then you pretty much know how much they cared in the first place.  You don’t need false friends and love.  

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Welcome Claire.  Despite limited ability to come out to all you, are free to speak here.  Please join in the conversation.  

 

Cheers, Jani

 

 

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Well, you are.  You just can't let others see the fullness of your presence.   

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Hi Claire,

Welcome to Transpulse. I'm glad you're here!

 

Lots of love and a big welcome hug, 

Timber Wolf ?

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Welcome Claire.  Like you i simply wanted to be a woman. I was 63 when i went full time.My family certainly wasn't happy but i am and they have grown to accept.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

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I work all day as a Male    I come home now and dress full time as a woman   my partner has allowed this

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Love wearing my skirts and dresses    just wish I could do that outside    sadly will never happen 

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That's not ALL bad. I have a lovely, white peasant skirt that I fear for whenever I wear it outside. It's light and breezy, but the white always makes me nervous. I know SOMETHING is going to stain it forever. The only solution is constant vigilance. That wears on you after a while.

 

Hugs!

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Welcome Claire.

 

20 hours ago, Claire 1960 said:

Love wearing my skirts and dresses    just wish I could do that outside    sadly will never happen 

 

You might be surprised to know that even when a certain part of your life is closeted, there are opportunities to express your feminine side outside with the rest of the world.  I have made it work for a long time, Claire, it just takes planning and a smart approach to presenting in public.  Attending a trans conference can be a perfect opportunity to spread your feminine wings. It does sound as though you are getting to express yourself at home, and clearly that is safer.

 

Hugs,

 

Sally

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Hi Claire, I’m 75 years old and have been coming out for a very long time. My wife is somewhat tolerant to my feminine side. I wear panties and bra everyday; I shave my body; sit to pee and wear woman’s cloths as much as I can.  All of this helps me reveal my feminine side. A lot of woman’s cloths pass for men’s. 

 

I’m trans feminine and have no plans to begin HRT or to have surgery. I fear loosing my family and wife.  Right now I’m happy the way I am.  Good luck and take life one step at a time.

 

Hugs

 

Sandr

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  • Posts

    • RaineOnYourParade
      happy trans birthday! I can't speak personally on the subject, but I hope hormones bring you the changes you're looking for <3 
    • MaeBe
      That’s super healthy, to see that something that becomes common has less effect on you and that you are able to decipher these feelings.   Sadly, this trend tends to only deaden good feelings as we tend not to let bad feelings attenuate the same way.   I have noticed less euphoria, but still feel the dysphorias that I have. Sometimes the good sneaks in and reminds me, but often time it’s just me seeing myself in the mirror and being comfortable about what I see when embracing my realized self. I may not get the same buzz I once did, but I don’t feel incongruous when looking at a more “drab” reflection.    Wishing you strength, you are amazing!
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    • missyjo
      maebe thank you I try to be. I thank God for blessings, try to share them, beg forgiveness for my shortcomings n vow to try to do better...2 priests have said no, God doesn't condemn you just for being trans...but apparently evangelicals do   I shall vtry dear thank you  
    • MaeBe
      Meet him at the being good to others part of Christianity. At the heart of it, there are excellent tenets of the faith. Those that condemn are judging, Jesus would have us be selfless; stone casting and all that. Are you a good person? Are you putting good into the world? If your gender is an issue for God, let God judge. In the mortal realm, let your actions be heard. 
    • missyjo
      and just fi sweeten it..I'm catholic n he hasn't been for years..he's evangelical..whatever that is
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    • missyjo
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    • missyjo
      abigail darling what about extensions or a wig? be brave n hang in there  to thine own self be true  good luck
    • RaineOnYourParade
      When I first started figuring things out, I got a lot more euphoria. Every time a friend would use he/they pronouns for me, I'd get this bubbly feeling, and seeing myself look masculine made me really happy. Dysphoric state felt more normal, so I guess I noticed the pain it caused me less.   Now, it's more just that my pronouns and such things feel natural, and dysphoria is a lot stronger -- I know what's natural, so experiencing the opposite is more jarring than everything. The problem is, most of my natural experiences are from friends, and I rarely get properly gendered by strangers, much less by my family. I've found myself unable to bind in months due to aches, colds,, and not wanting to risk damage.    It partially makes me want to go back to the beginning of my journey, because at least then I got full euphoria. I'm pretty sure it'll be like this until I medically transition, or at the very least get top surgery (you know all those trans dudes online with tiny chests? Not me, unfortunately). It's a bit depressing, but at least I know that, eventually, there's a way out of this.
    • RaineOnYourParade
      Major mood, right here ^^^    I've listened to Lumineers to a long time (a major portion of it by osmosis via my mom), so that is almost painfully relatable
    • RaineOnYourParade
      As for getting a button-up/formal pants suit, you can try to talk to her more -- Cis women in tuxes have worn tuxes in recent years, after all, (for example, Zendaya) so it can still be a relatively safe topic. For jumpsuits, I'd recommend going with a simple one with a blazer, if you can -- this'll make it look overall more masculine. There's a lot of good brands, but going for one without a lot of extra glitz on it will make it look less feminine under a blazer. I don't know many specific brands though since I usually just get my stuff from chain stores, sorry :<   When it comes to your hair, if you can't cut it, you can look up tutorials on fluffing it up instead. If you can pull it off, it can look a lot shorter and more androgynous instead!
    • RaineOnYourParade
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    • Abigail Genevieve
      I am not sure why people are in favor of unaccountable agencies with bloated budgets and wasteful spending. 
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