Jackie Goes For Bottom Surgery

[KathyLauren]

Yikes!  I'm not looking forward to that!

 

I hope things even out for you soon.

 

Regards,

Kathy

[ShawnaLeigh]

Yes this happen to me when I had to go off mine to get a bade line blood work panel.  Omg it was terrible.  So I feel for you hon.  
Just make sure your nice to your wonderful wife!!!

 

[Jackie C.]

Since HRT, I've actually become the more considerate spouse. Still, I'll keep it in mind for when she gets home. For now though, I need to go stick a telephone pole into my new orifice.

 

Hugs!

[ShawnaLeigh]

1 hour ago, Jackie C. said:

I need to go stick a telephone pole into my new orifice.

Go with the one with no climbing pegs. No need to push it on a Friday night.  ?

[Chrysalis]

I can't imagine there being enough lubricant in the whole world to lessen the vey discomfort of that. But, you have arrived and

?Congratulations??

[Jackie C.]

My first purchase upon arriving home was a box of 12 - 4.25 oz tubes of Surgilube. At my current rate of consumption, that's good for about a month. It will start to taper off as my "dates with dilation" drop off.

 

Oddly it's less about the lubrication and more about the position. I usually have to adjust myself a couple of times before I find the "golden spot" where it slides in more-or-less easily.

 

Hugs!

[Susan R]

Jackie, does insurance usually cover something like that?  That stuff is not cheap and I can see where the expenses might really add up.

[Chrysalis]

I've read that in time it is possible to dilate without any lubrication at all. . .Of course, there are those who still insist that the Earth is flat, so. . .

My wish for you is that you should proceed through it all pain free and without prescription drugs!

 

Luv yer way comes!

 

[Jackie C.]

46 minutes ago, Susan R said:

Jackie, does insurance usually cover something like that?  That stuff is not cheap and I can see where the expenses might really add up.

 

They do not. At least mine doesn't. Still, that's not terrible. In bulk like that my order ran $44.95. Once I'm down to 1/day (in another 5 months or so) that's only an extra $11.25 a month. That's not so bad. It keeps a good while and I can buy in bulk.

 

40 minutes ago, Chrysalis said:

I've read that in time it is possible to dilate without any lubrication at all. . .Of course, there are those who still insist that the Earth is flat, so. . .

My wish for you is that you should proceed through it all pain free and without prescription drugs!

 

It's not super-comfortable, but as long as you relax and don't force anything it doesn't hurt. Aside from the couple of times I've hit a raw spot positioning the dilator there hasn't been any real pain. I've still got most of the painkillers they sent me home with. I took a couple to help me sleep early on, but now they're just a hassle. It's the good stuff. Oxy laced with Tylenol, but I haven't really needed pain meds through most of the experience and my pain tolerance is on the low side. Don't go thinking I can shrug off bullets or anything. It's honestly about the same pain level as a skinned knee. I'm aware of it, but it doesn't really slow me down much,

 

Hugs!

[Jackie C.]

So Here We Are At Week Four

 

I remember healing faster than this. Then again, this is the first time I've suffered quite this much trauma. So, in no particular order.

 

The Surgical Site. This is still a horror show. While it's starting to look like a vagina... from the side... if you squint... and you've had a few... it's still swollen as all get out and looks like a handful of rotten hamburger meat. For complications, we've had one of my vent holes open back up. I'm working with my patient advocate to get what I need to close that sucker back up before it becomes infected. I've also got an overabundance of sloughing tissue. While it's good to know what the yellow stuff actually is, it's like my wound is making its very own dessert custard with cherry topping. I say cherry topping because I'm still bleeding here and there. My inner thighs are a bit raw as well from all the "By the Goddess! Don't let the toxic swamp escape!" garments I've been wearing. They're all terrible. The thin pads are, however, the least terrible. I can at least wear those during the day.

I suspect that the hold up in getting my wound site dealt with is that it might require a nurse that specializes in wound care and that knows what they're doing with GCS patients. If the waiting goes on too much longer I'm going to suggest that they send me to urgent care with a prescription. I'd rather do this right than screw it up trying to handle it myself.

I should point out that I'm still swollen, but I knew that was going to happen going in. I'm like a delicate flower petal. Right now I feel like a delicate flower petal being chewed apart by ants.

 

Dilation. I still haven't worked out the best way to do this. I was reading articles today while I was dilating about how to make it easier. I think I see the mechanics of the problem, but I'm still going to need to work out what I can do without having to hose down all the furniture afterwards. I also had a cat bounce off the surgical site today while I was laying on the bed. It's definitely still swollen and painful.

I purchased some cheap towels this week so I could ooze on them instead of buying more disposable pads. While the pads were amazing in the beginning, I'm starting to feel well enough to do laundry.

My dilation routine has me thinking about the legend of King Arthur. I find myself really identifying with the stone that holds Excalibur until the One True King comes by to pull it free. Maybe I need something to occupy my brain while I'm dilating.

 

Daily Activity. While I'm going to have to put off the gym (at least) another week, I can manage most of my daily routine. I can drive with minimal discomfort so I can run errands. I'm going to try going out and having a little fun tonight. I've been cooped up in the house too long.

 

Unexpected Benefit. On the list of things I was not expecting, my bowels have been moving more frequently and easily than they have in ages. I'm not sure if it's the stop and restart thing we did for surgery or the fact that dilation basically includes a colon massage four times a day but things down below are running very, very smoothly. Probably TMI, but it's nice to have a little sunshine now and then, right?

 

Hugs!

[ShawnaLeigh]

Although I am sorry for your discomfort and pain.  You definitely have a flare...

I still maintain I am a go for this in my future.  You are not going to scare me off!

[Jackie C.]

Maybe I should have gone into more detail about the smell? I assure you that the slough does not smell like cherry blossoms, strawberries and red licorice. It's more like sweaty mummy balls.

 

Not trying to scare anybody off though. Just letting people know what I'm going through so you can have a snapshot of what you could expect.

 

I swear I used to heal faster. Getting older sucks.

 

Hugs!

[ShawnaLeigh]

I suppose my next question would be how do you know what sweaty mummy balls smell like?

Seriously  How?

LOL

 

I truly appreciate what you are sharing with all of us.  It is amazing and extremely educational.

[Laura76]

All Right JackieC,

 

Keep those cards and letters coming. We await the next chapter, as ShawnaLeigh we appreciate what you are sharing with us.

When it comes my time, I will remember your instructive comments.  I know it will help me get into a positive healing mode.

[Susan R]

Jackie, I personally appreciate all the detail you go into with this.  I doubt there would be any way to obtain such a quality overview elsewhere.  I certainly know what to expect now.  I’ll likely reread this entire thread a few times before my time comes around.

 

Susan R?

[Jackie C.]

You are most welcome. It's a labor of love! Also slough. So much slough. I never expected to have a diaper bag set up in my bathroom for my (very) late 40's. At least now I know what all the gunk is. My next question for my long suffering patient advocate... and I say long-suffering because while I won't/can't post pictures here, she gets a new set whenever I spot something that makes me nervous... was going to be, "This yellow stuff: Am I looking at pus or mucous?"

 

Naturally, this is all new to me. It all makes me nervous. She has a lot of (so not sexy) pictures of my vagina in her inbox.

 

The moral of the story is having someone origami your nethers into a new shape hurts. Also nature is gross. Both those things seem obvious, but this experience has really, really driven them home.

 

Hugs!

[Chrysalis]

Sweaty mummy balls? How twisted am I to find that so very funny? 

 

I recall many decades ago sitting in a car full of friends at a drive-in theatre and watching 'The Christine Jorgensen Story' and for some reason they left out all of your icky details.

Perhaps it's too late now to ask for my money back?

 

Also: I envy you the regular bowel activity!

 

Get well oh-so-soon!

[Laura76]

Wise sayings by JackieC.

 

1. "...someone origami your nethers..."

2. "...looks like a roast beef sandwich someone dropped on the floor..."

3. "...the slough does not smell like cherry blossoms..."

4. "...looks like a handful of rotten hamburger meat..."

5. "...Don't let that toxic swamp escape!..."

6. "...For now though, I need to go stick a telephone pole into my new orifice..."

 

Just some wisdom and starter list of Words and Sayings to Live by, author Jackie C

[Jackie C.]

Last night a friend asked about my surgery. I told him I was leaking, "Basically pomegranate custard," from the surgical site. It's funny, but even after all this time my friends seem to think I've got a filter.

 

Hugs!

[Jackie C.]

Week Five

 

Basic recovery is supposed to take 4-6 weeks. Here we are at week five. Sitting still hurts. I need to chose my positions carefully. My pillow is my constant companion. There's colorless discharge from the surgical site (could be anything). I can tell you it's clear, gross and cool by the time it hits my leg (about mid-knee). It's rare to see any actual blood at this point, though sometimes I get a bit of pink when I change my panty liner.

 

Cost. People were asking about this so I'm going to try and compile it. Your insurance covers whatever it covers. Maybe it's nothing, maybe it's half or maybe it's a full ride. However, there are additional supplies. First off, diapers. If you care about your sheets at all, it's adult undergarments for four to eight weeks. Then panty liners. While these aren't super expensive (I buy store-brand), I go through about three in a typical day. So for those keeping score at home it's 1-2 adult diapers plus three panty liners every day.

($44.55/12 tubes) Next up is lube. Lube costs are going to vary by technique but I spent about $50 on what will eventually be a three or four month supply. In the first couple of months though, you're going to go through it a lot faster.

($8.27/week) On to <water balloon>. My surgeon recommends that I <water balloon> once a week (on Saturday, yes, she dictated Saturday), though I was douching every other day for the first week. Eventually, this is supposed to drop to 1-2 times a month to keep fresh.

($11.74/3-pack) Other feminine hygiene products: Next week I start with feminine wash every day in the shower. I'm also using feminine wipes to help clean up after dilation. The idea here is to get my little vaginal ecosystem stable and under control. Also to keep it from being overrun by yeast. 

The point being that you're going to experience a little "period poverty." If you're not ready for it. Keep the cost for hygienic supplies in mind. They just went up.

 

Dilation. I start on 3x a day tomorrow, down from 4x a day. It's going to feel like a vacation. What AM I going to do with the extra time?

More importantly, some supplies you'll want for this: Get a yoga pillow. I balance my backside on this while I dilate. Left leg bent to use as a lever. Right leg and buttocks are totally relaxed. Easiest pose for insertion I've found yet. You might need to maneuver yourself on the pillow a little to get the angle right, but this is the most comfortable pose I've found.

 

Douching. Something that isn't mentioned on the packaging at all: Warm that sucker up. Draw a sink of hot water and float the bulbs for a couple of minutes. It's a completely different experience from squirting cold liquid into your new orifice. Granted, I wished I'd figured this out weeks ago but...

 

Healing. Things are improving slowly. I can sit up for longer periods and move around a bit more freely. I think I'm going to start hitting the gym again next week. I can at least work my back and arms a little. Thighs are probably out. We'll keep it low-key and see what I can manage to do. Honestly I miss everybody and want to see friends again.

Otherwise, there's less blood. Pain is about the same, though if I hit just the right position it goes away for a while. The incisions still look like Halloween makeup and there's some redness around parts of the surgical site. I can see the eventual shape of things to come though. I'm interested to see what it's going to look like over the coming months.

 

Medication. It actually took me a solid week to get this prescription filled. I assume it was insurance shenanigans. This medication is supposed to eat away at sloughing skin to reveal healthy skin underneath. What it doesn't mention is that sloughing skin feels like cold, melting marshmallow. It's like putting your fingers into chilled skin pudding. So gross.

It also doesn't stick very well. I think this medication would be more effective as a spray, but here we are.

I'm supposed to apply for five days. The fifth day being tomorrow. I think it looks better than it did, but I'd recommend a couple more days. We'll see what kind of yawning hellscape I'm staring into come Thursday morning.

 

Skirts and Leggings. Both keep the pressure on your surgical site to a minimum. You should have a stock of both ready to wear.

 

Follow-up. My first follow-up appointment with my surgeon is on Thursday. We'll see what she thinks of her handiwork.

 

Hugs!

[VickySGV]

35 minutes ago, Jackie C. said:

There's colorless discharge from the surgical site (could be anything). I can tell you it's clear, gross and cool by the time it hits my leg (about mid-knee)

 

Actually this is your new vagina doing what it is supposed to do, but maybe a bit overactive.  It is going to get moist and in time will develop what the surgeons call vaginal flora which are a combination of benign yeasts and bacteria that are generally on our skin which will help with maintenance as time goes by, not to mention that some of it is lube you have put up in there.  I and others further along Posties can almost dilate without the lube since our surgical techniques involved using mucus tissue that creates moisture.  You are doing great.

[Jackie C.]

This Is My Life Now

 

I spend a lot of time doing this, so I thought I'd include a picture.

 

 

Try to ignore the exposed -vagina-.

 

Hugs!

[Laura76]

Lovely photo of your -vagina-... cat Jackie. More expressive is your award winning smile.  Keep up the good work, looking forward to your next post.:)

[Laura76]

For some reason my original post substituted pussycat to vagina...cat, what is up with that. I was not taking at all about lower anatomy.

[Jackie C.]

The profanity filter is a strange and mysterious beast. Much like I didn't type <water balloon>. He's a cute little guy. He's "helping" his mother get ready for noon dilation in that particular shot.

 

Hugs!