Yo-yo

[Guest Dutchie]

Hi everyone,

It's been something like 4 months since my last visit here. Lots has happened and I was never far away from this forum, just around the corner really.

Some highlights: against all odds I got married for the third time, but this time with the understanding (actually a very romantic promise) that after I'm done with the official change we'll remarry in the Netherlands (where same-sex marriages are legal). Originally we planned on "just" an official partnership contract, but that felt too distant and businesslike.

The wedding was small, but magical. Not so much magical in the practical sense, it was simple, not standard, but nice.

The magical part was the small group we assembled for the wedding. Our 4 witnesses met the Friday before at our house and got along so well, that a new close friendship between two of them has started (perhaps more than that). The wedding itself was on Monday and everybody was in great spirits, all dressed very colourfull and along the way to the council people were picking flowers. The mayor was surprised by both the flowers, our outfits and the fact that we wanted to marry on a monday (which is very rare here). He got even more suprised that once he pronounced us married, we both started to cry! (From happyness of course!) We were also a little pressed by the time, if we waited longer it would have become impossible to marry as my changes are becoming more and more obvious. Ok, the magical part doesn't really show in the text, but everybody said it was...

I've been takling to a (US-based) gender psychiatrist since January, since it became clearer that finding one near me was getting impossible. France is out of the question, (yes, I think it's nice that I no longer have a mental illness according to the minister of Health, but they still treat you as such!) and the neighbouring countries either too far or too difficult for language reasons. So I'm very glad I found someone I can work with and who can work with me... After all, if you can't stand your shrink, you won't be able to receive the treatment you should. Besides I don't see my shrink as a person trying to treat me, but rather a guide on how not to screw up psychologically. So far nothing new has been coming up, just some new insights in how I work mentally.

So in all I'm doing great, most of the time I'm happy about my life (especially when I'm not dealing with society), I cherish my friends, especially the ones who have been and still are very supportive.

The only part that's not going so great is work, but at least I still have work. It could be over by the end of summer, Plans of outsourcing to low-pay countries have passed the revue, but are still not off the table. I haven't come out at work yet, in fear of being tossed out sooner than planned. I know that I'm perceived as being different. After all, I'm no longer going to work as a "normal" guy, but rather androgyne hinting on female and very colourful. Most people perceive meas rather artistic, which is fine by me. Who needs labels!

Oh yes and I spoke to my mother for the first time in over 20 years. It wasn't bad, but not that great either. At least we spoke, that's something.

Anyway, I'm a yo-yo, not quite away from the forum, yet not quite here either. I hope to be a bit more here again... :-)

[Guest Pól_Eire]

Well, welcome back, then, Dutchie!

Pól

[Sally]

Hey Duthcie!

It's me, Sally and it is so good to see you again - I thought that you had just frogoton us.

Would it help to keep you coming back if I get you some hot cocoa and a batch of my fresh from the oven Double Chocolate Chip Cookies?

Seriously I am glad that things are going well for you and congratulations on the wedding - I think that you have found a very special lady.

Love ya,

Sally

[Guest Alyssa Leigh]

Hey Dutchie

Welcome back and Congrats on getting married.

[Guest 1charlotte1]

I have been lucky with the same sex marriage (which is legal in Iowa!!!) who said all we have is corn? Bwahaha!!

Welcome back, although I admit we've never met!

Hugz, Charlotte

[Guest Eth]

Welcome back, and congratulations on your wedding!

[Guest Marissa Anastasia]

Glad you're back Dutchie...I haven't had the pleasure, because I'm relatively new. Welcome back.

Love,

Marissa

[Guest Elizabeth K]

Dutchie!

WOW you are a busy girl! hee hee

Glad to see you again!

Lizzy

[Guest joe0117]

Hi Dutchie!

Welcome back and congrats on your marriage! Hope to see you around when you have some free time not beinga newlywed

Joe

[Guest Dutchie]

Thank you all for the re-welcoming. It's good to be back.

Welcome back and congrats on your marriage! Hope to see you around when you have some free time not beinga newlywed

I might be a newly-wed, but we've been living together long enough that it doesn't change much. What it did change was the depth of our relationship, it got a lot deeper and I feel more secure now. One of the reasons (beside the obvious ones) is that I wanted to be sure that in case something happens to me, the family is financially secured, at least for a while. After all, you never know what might happen and we were feeling that the time had come for some action...

@Sally: I have never forgotten about LP, it was just that I was lacking time left and right for lots of things. Now it's a bit calmer.

Anyway, it's great to see that LP hasn't lost any of it's charm, the warmth and friendliness!!

[Guest Marissa Anastasia]

Welcome back Teresa. You know better than I do what a wonderful group we have. Take care,and I look forward to your posts.

Love,

Marissa