My Trangender support group leader said somehting werid

[Lexi C]

I was at my local Transgender support group yesterday and the forewoman said  to me....." Well at least as trans person you get to experience what its like to be both male and female.

Is that how transgender people think?. 

I got to tell you TP I never experience what it truly was to be male. I was always afraid someone would find out my secrets. I was to busy trying to not be female. I just pretended to be male. I sure as hell never real felt like a boy or man. So am I insane to think I did something wrong. It like when my  elder neighbor from across the street ask me ;" if it hurt? I said " did what hurt? 

" you know the trans gendering. Does it hurt?

I was dumb found like maybe I doing something wrong because they only thing that hurts so far is the facial electrolysis and the emotional roller coast of cooping. Sorry I just wondering if any of you feel like my Forewoman .As always Thanks for the support 

 

 

 

[VickySGV]

Our language about gender is pretty tricky and can be a real mind twister depending on how we take it and how we feel at certain  times.  It also depends upon who says certain things.  I certainly did experience a lot of the pure garbage that we put young boys through "because they are boys", I did get that!  I did not experience the same type of manure that we put girls that age through though.  As a Trans woman adult though, I experience the garbage that adult women are subjected to, but it works the other way as well.  Kindness and affection toward either gender though, are just that, and I did get some of that along the way as well.  Our language and understanding of what it is to be either gender still has a long way to come.

[Lexi C]

well said Vicky well said ty

[ShawnaLeigh]

I understand her point in the abstract.  I was born male and treated male and for a long time I lived male.  Early on I did not know what it was or if I was weird or made wrong.  I was just me and everyone treated me male.  I grew up being male.  In my teens it was around puberty when it started dawning on me something was off with me.  Not wrong but not the definition of being male. In my young adulthood I knew what I felt and how I would reacted to things and I wanted to be female but hid due to fears and societies norm.  
As an older adult I struggles with being male but by this time I definitely knew “how” to be male and conform to society.  Although having a female brain and recognizing it as such.  
Now I’m living full time female and seeing a whole other side. I love being the real me.  No more hiding. But I do understand “knowing” what it’s like to be male.  I’m learning what it’s like to be fully accepted as female in society.  Well my local society anyways.  
Hoeever I’m not trying to fool anyone into thinking I’m cis female snd I am quick to show my pride in being trans.  
So yes I do agree with her point but I use the words male and female on purpose because I never felt I was a “man” and I have little experience being a “women” yet so I need to add knowing what it’s like to be trans as well not just male or female.  Being transgender is just that. From one to the other.  You will know what it’s like to be both or you haven’t been paying attention. Lol
jmo 

[Lexi C]

I never know what is was to be either. My hood grown up you would beating severely if you did not fit into a male or female box. Hell if you were black, Hispanic ( which I am but thank god did not look it) Asian anything but white you were beating because you where consider an outsider..I witness it..So I put all my female thought in the deep black box behind  my heart. But I was never truly male, I play strong  and fought my way out my bar and gang fights then I can count . I never really ask out any girl and one had 3 real GF in my  50 of life and they all end with in months But I was just trying to be guy because I too afraid to girl...Maybe its just my situation. But Trust me I did a lot of listen and that was the only way to survive for me.  Hugs

[Lexi C]

Thank Mary

[ShawnaLeigh]

Well I don’t fault anyone for doing what they had to do to survive and just live as safely as possible.  
Your situation was not your fault and you did what anyone would do.   Be proud of yourself for surviving and growing up to be a responsible adult.  
You can be you now so run with it!  
Im trying hard to do the same thing and I had none of the adversity you had.  
 

[ToniTone]

I catch myself a lot relating to experiences guys have, then saying something like "When I was a guy..." Then I stop myself because I remember I never really was a man, I was just living the facade of a man. So that's the only experience I can speak from. When this happens, I'm most likely the only one overthinking it. 

 

That's who I was, the woman I have become still in development, concealed by the facade of a man. Now the experience of being this woman is the only thing that's real. 

 

I'm transfem androgynous, so I guess I could say my experience crosses over the genders. But my identity strongly lies in the feminine... 

 

~Toni

[Lexi C]

thanks ladies 

[BrandiBri]

On 3/14/2020 at 8:05 PM, Alex C said:

the forewoman said  to me....." Well at least as trans person you get to experience what its like to be both male and female.

Alex, I wonder if the forewoman meant or should have said "got", instead of "get". That would have meant that you, as trans, had the unique experience of living as a male and now you are experiencing life as a female. I was assigned male at birth, raised as male and even presented as male for 69 years, but now I am experiencing life as the woman I always was. I can relate to the way men think and act, but I will never, ever express that lifestyle again.

On 3/15/2020 at 6:51 PM, Alex C said:

My hood grown up you would beating severely if you did not fit into a male or female box.

I, and most others here can relate to that. When I realized in 1959 that I was "different", one could not even talk about being gay without being singled out for violence.

On 3/15/2020 at 9:21 PM, ToniTone said:

I catch myself a lot relating to experiences guys have, then saying something like "When I was a guy..." Then I stop myself because I remember I never really was a man,

Not long ago I had the same revelation. I always have been a girl, even if I didn't know it then. I don't think I'm transgender, I am transbodied!

Alex, please don't pay too much attention to the people who say things like what your elderly neighbour said. He was ignorant as to what transgender is about. 

 

Keep on being who you are,

Hugs, Brandi