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Denise is ready to come out and soon the transition


Denisenj

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Hi girls my name is Denise I was born male and I always felt that I should have been born a female. I always liked women and being around women I'm getting ready to go through a divorce. My wife knew about Denise back in the early 90s and let her have fun with her. Like 10 years ago she just wanted me to stop I'm going to counseling and soon I hope to start HRT. I get support from the younger generation to be me I know I'm older but I present well as a female for my age of 61. I don't feel 61 or look like I'm 61 when I'm Denise. I come here for guidance and acceptance and love.

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Welcome Denise, You look beautiful. I will also be starting hrt very soon. I’m sorry to hear your going through a divorce but from what I have learned you are never to old be who you want to be. 
 

Emily

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Thank you for the reply Emily I've been trying to reinvent myself I actually own more female clothes and male clothes. I lost weight I'm not afraid to go get my nails done or ashamed. I've been wearing some sort of eye make up for the past year-and-a-half now in guy mode usually mascara and some neutral shade shadows can getting pedicures for the past 25 years with color and going out with female sandals.for the past 6 months I've been having my nails done and I let them grow out and they look really nice and I enjoy it. Tomorrow I have a behavioral health counselor calling me to talk about me to and ask questions . I already know I have a female brain cuz I think like a woman I have anxiety I'm a little depressed and I'm a bit anxious and I'm scared. The color is called periwinkle. They are my natural nails except for 2 which broke and I almost cried so I had to get an acrylic tip put on I wear color now all the time in guy mode and nobody says nothing to me 13

 

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  • Forum Moderator

Very color coordinated!  I like!  

Welcome Denise.  You're never too old to be the person you really are.  Good for you.  Sorry about the impending divorce though.  Having a talk with a counselor is good.  Unfortunately you can't be face to face, but ant port in the storm.  You'll do fine and be on your way soon enough!  

Cheers, Jani

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Your nails are gorgeous I would die to have nails die to have nails like that. Either I bites mine of or they get broken because of my job. I have more women’s clothes now then men I can’t stand to wear my male clothes anymore. I have been seeing a therapist and it has helped but I still get the anxiety and depression and a lot of that is I’m anxious to transition further.

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When I go out as Denise I go to safe places . Here is a picture of me back in December. I am getting good at my make-up. I lost about 15 lbs since this pic.I went to Borgata Casino in AC to pride bingo..  I hung out with the lesbians ,I felt more comfortable

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39 minutes ago, Denisenj said:

I am getting good at my make-up. I lost about 15 lbs since this pic.I went to Borgata Casino in AC to pride bingo..  I hung out with the lesbians ,I felt more comfortable

Welcome Denise, nice to have you here.  You look great and I agree, you do very well with your make-up.  You look like someone who’s been on HRT for awhile.  I’m sure you’ll be amazed with your results from HRT based on your already feminine face. Lovely pics, btw!  Hope to read more about your journey up until this point.  I’m sure there’s lots to share.

 

Warmest Regards,

Susan R?

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...Thanks Susan, I appreciate your positive comments. They are a confidence booster.I try hard to look female,and for you to notice  & mention that makes me wonder how I can look after starting. HRT. I only had 3 sessions of lasar on my upper lip and 3 electrolysis hours on my chin but Denise is on hold due to this pandemic. Working on my voice by myself but not much yet.  Happy to be here :)

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2 hours ago, Denisenj said:

I try hard to look female,and for you to notice  & mention that makes me wonder how I can look after starting. HRT.

Another nice pic. Your nails go very well with your outfit. After a year on HRT, I’m sure you’ll notice some rounding and softening of your face. Also, the skin changes, for me, were the most under rated effects of HRT.  The pandemic is slowing a lot of stuff down transition-wise, especially here in Washington.  There is a statewide moratorium on non-essential surgeries until further notice.  This includes surgery consultations so I’m affected too.  We do what we can do.

 

Susan R?

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17 hours ago, Denisenj said:

...Thanks Susan, I appreciate your positive comments. They are a confidence booster.I try hard to look female,and for you to notice  & mention that makes me wonder how I can look after starting. HRT. I only had 3 sessions of lasar on my upper lip and 3 electrolysis hours on my chin but Denise is on hold due to this pandemic. Working on my voice by myself but not much yet.  Happy to be here :)

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OMG I love this shirt!!!  Your nails are to die for as well.  WOW!

Welcome to our family Denise we are s glad to have you.

You are home.

 

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Shawnal, I am so happy to belong ..Hopefully I make some friends in here. I lost some people who I thought were my friends many know I like to cross-dress but I don't know if they thought I want to transition. Thank you for the kind words. I don't want to feel like an outcast, I want to belong and contribute to this website. I'm sure many of you in here kind of feel similar but it really feels good to admitt to yourself that you are transgender. I had a counseling session over the phone he wants to have one more on Tuesday of next week. The John Bell center said I'm not showing any red flags and he don't see why I can't start on HRT. It feels funny but I'm kind of excited just knowing I could be starting on the pill soon. My heartfelt hugs go out to all those who struggled with their identities, may your inner peace finally be achieved.  I always thought black nails were okay until the first time I got mine done. I changed my nail color like every week or every other week depending on my mood. And I have to go to a nail salon because they do a better job than I can

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Edited by Jani
Spell check: Males to Nails
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1 hour ago, Denisenj said:

I don't want to feel like an outcast, I want to belong and contribute to this website. I'm sure many of you in here kind of feel similar but it really feels good to admitt to yourself that you are transgender.

Oh honey you are definitely in the right place.  

We all came her feeling hurt, confused and very scared.  Some well along but stil questioning and needing answer or just a community.  This place saved my life and many others.  I have grown to love being here and have made many friends.  We share and cry together.  We accept and support one another when one else will.  A lot of folks here are struggling with failing or failed marriages and a lot have made it work. So much positive in the shadow of what transgender can be.

I'm glad you are here!

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Denise I never thought I'd like dark nails either.  I went looking for black polish one time and found a Black Cherry that I liked better (wearing it now!).   My granddaughter thought it was black the first time she saw it, its that dark.  I don't change the color as often as you do (lazy!) but I do them myself.

 

As others have said this is a caring community so join in.  We're all on this trip together! 

Cheers, Jani 

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You are no outcast, honey! if I were still a male I would definitely ask you out! Heck I probably would ask even though I am female now.

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