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Had another interesting "Outed" moment.


ShawnaLeigh

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Ok sorry if this is a bit long but there is a set up to this story.

Those who don't know I had car trouble yesterday in my company car but because I work so far from the University I am tasked with having oil changes done etc.  and I needed to bring it to Toyota today.  

So I knew it was going to take a long while to repair as they always do.  I sat and drank coffee and was there all by myself. Very socially distanced.  LOL

Played online mostly.  I was getting paid so whatever..

So the service guy comes to get me with the news that I was correct about it needing a wheel bearing (surprise) but they did not have all the parts.  This was 4 hours in btw but it was ok I was getting paid.  LOL  He was asking if they could keep in over night which I know is best.  So I asked about a loaner and he was ok with that.  "All I need is your Drivers License and the insurance card.  Um "UT oh" I'm thinking.  So I dig out my license and hand it to him awaiting the reaction since it has not been changed yet.

He hands it back to me and says "I need your license, you handed me your fathers."   I'm like "Um no it is mine."  Then I proceeded to tell him I am transgender and thanked him for the compliment.  His coworker standing next to him over heard all this was like "What!!!" in total shock and dismay.  I asked him if he was ok with that?  Kind of defensive.  He back peddles a bit and then says of course he is but that he was a bit embarrassed.  I ask why.  He said he was trying to work up the courage to ask me out.  

Now I'm the one shocked.  To the core.  I didn't say anything at first just stared at him making him very uncomfortable.  His coworker was just snickering the whole time because they were talking about it the whole time I was there and he was trying to get his friend to ask me out. (he told me this after the fact).  I let him off the hook nicely though and just said "Sorry I am married".

So I get my loaner car and the guy who did not want to ask me out was assisting me with that now.  This is when he told me about this friend wanting to ask me.  I admitted I was very shocked and told him I had just come out and just started being full time.  We talked a while and he asked me a lot of good questions and I was happy to answer them.  He was very nice and pleasant and I thanked him for treating me so nicely after he knew.  

Can only assume he is not going to be so nice to his buddy though poor things.  Actually both fairly good looking guys but I certainly was not expecting this interchange at all.

So I was outed but it was a nice/weird/ and pleasant experience.  

 

 

 

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  • Forum Moderator

Nice! All I get is questions from younger guys looking for insight into how women think. That's both very flattering and validating.

 

I bet you don't need a loaner now though. You could fly home. ?

 

Hugs!

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I guess that answers any lingering questions about whether you look female or not.

 

Jani

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This story made my day not gonna lie. Half way through I was getting ready to beat someone with my shoe, but it took a turn for the better so. 

 

The funniest thing that made me feel validated was when I was in the girls bathroom (I am not brave enough to go in the men's) And a girl walked in and looked at me shocked as if she just walked in the wrong bathroom. 

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2 hours ago, Jackie C. said:

I bet you don't need a loaner now though. You could fly home. ?

 

You would win that bet.  It was extremely weird at first but extremely flattering and validating for sure.

 

2 hours ago, Jani said:

I guess that answers any lingering questions about whether you look female or not.

Yes for sure.  You never know at first and always feel a bit weird about going out when you first start to go in public as your true self.  I was always a confident person but it is damn scary at times and every day I meet new challenges on being a women in our society.  Things like this make it all worth it today.

 

2 hours ago, Aidan5 said:

This story made my day not gonna lie. Half way through I was getting ready to beat someone with my shoe, but it took a turn for the better so. 

Thank you my young brother.  I like knowing I have some real men watching my back!!! 

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That is so neat!

Floating home is an interesting image.

I'm jealous you get cute guys hitting on you.

TA

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That’s got to be one of the best affirmations ever @ShawnaLeigh! You have it going on girl!?

 

Susan R?

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Haha. There is nothing more validating then that. I could only imagine how excited you were after that. That would make sitting there all day worth it.

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13 hours ago, ShawnaLeigh said:

course he is but that he was a bit embarrassed.  I ask why.  He said he was trying to work up the courage to ask me out. 

 

 

I love that bit Shawna. How affirming is that? You know your doing something right when that is part of the day.

 

WTG :goodone:

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I am not going to lie, it was extremely shocking to hear at first and it was rendered speechless for a moment and anyone who knows me knows I am quite gabby.  So this was new for me too. LOL

I was not prepared for this to happen to me being so new to the public as Shawna.  I did not expect this sort of attention at all and was seriously just hoping to pass as female and go unnoticed.  I felt if no one noticed me then I was neither being clocked nor viewed as anything but female.  This was my goal. 

I am also not going to lie and say I do not enjoy this.  I really really do!  LOL

 

Will something come of this?  NO.  Certainly not.  I am not ready nor able to pursue any relationships at this time and frankly its way to early for me since I am still learning who I am and how to be me as a women in our society.  Decades of male conditioning and "training" is hard to shed.  Not to mention technically I am still married though that's ending soon but still in a strange and unique situation at home.  

But I will say this girls.

It was freakin' awesome!  LOL

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14 hours ago, ShawnaLeigh said:

"I need your license, you handed me your fathers."

I couldn't help but notice that not only did they read female......they saw you as your own child!  Your definitely a young woman!

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

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35 minutes ago, Charlize said:

I couldn't help but notice that not only did they read female......they saw you as your own child!  Your definitely a young woman!

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

That stumped me at first. I had no idea what he meant and then laughed my ass off at it once I got his mistake.  He was so embarrassed and I felt bad but it was funny. 

His coworkes response was over the top but I could see his shock too!  

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Well I just had to include the "rest of the story" as it just happened a half hour ago.

I worked the day and was waiting for the dealership to call me telling me the car was   finished.  Which they did on my drive home.  So I diverted to Toyota to pick up the car.

My new "friend" had all my paperwork ready and his coworker was more then happy to assist him with checking in the loaner.  

They were both absolute gentlemen and treated me so nice and with respect.  I felt so good about this.  

So after they were finished with everything the young man who said yesterday he wanted to ask me out offered to helped me to my car.  I had my heavy backpack and a laptop bag and the of course my purse.  This felt a bit awkward but oh well.

So he was very nice and chatty and once we were at my car he started to apologize to me about if he made me uncomfortable yesterday.  I told him I was ok, that it just it took me off guard and I did not know what to say.

He then asked me out for coffee later today.  

I again got all tongue tied, "Ahhhhhh...  Im aaaahh, I cant Im sorry. I am really married." (omg he is so good looking!!!)

Then I looked at him with a cute scowl and got a bit sassy/flirty and said "Where the heck where you going to take me for coffee?!?!"   His turn to stammer.  He thought about this a bit and then said,.  "OH Crap!  I have no idea!"  Then we laughed.  He then asked me for my phone number.  Which I did not give him because, Yes,  I am married which I did tell him, again, I was not using that as an excuse.  I explained my living arrangement/divorce situation briefly to make him understand I was not just saying I was.  He gave me his company card that he had prewritten his cell number on the back, "Just in case I changed my mind or if I needed anything from him at Toyota."  I thanked him and just left it at that.  

I did notice he watched me the whole time I drove out and down the road. 

Yes I still floated home on cloud 9.  LOL

 

I am very excited but humbled by this. I still feel so subconscious about being attractive to men as a MTF.  Suspicious of why even.  He definitely knew I was transgender after yesterday's incident.  I seriously did not think I would ever attract anyone on this level.  No less so soon after presenting full time.

 

Its been my biggest fear and anxiety to never find anyone again after my divorce due to my transition.  I hate being alone but I really need to for a while I know.  It seriously made my heartbreak over losing the love from my wife so much worse because of this. I just felt my time for all that was now over.  Just going to live with it and try to be happy to just be me.

 

But I still have those princess dreams of being swept away by my knight in shining armor to live happily ever after.  Of course most of those dreams include us both being female, but now, I'm thinking Id be ok with a guy being prince charming...lol

I'm an old gal now but still have lots of heart and love to share.  

I feel optimistic for the first time in a long time.

I may actually have a shot at love and happiness again.

 

 

Edited by Jani
spell check: Coworker
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Aww, that's so sweet! I'm so very happy for you!

 

Hugs!

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I love that story! That has to make you feel good! I also fully understand your feelings for your wife. That may encumber your heart for a while to come! I know my feelings for my ex do mine. 

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This is not a story to tell your wife!  She will not enjoy it.  I know when we've been out together and I get attention I get the "look" from her.  In the interest of peace I hold my tongue if something like this happens when I'm out alone.

 

Cheers, Jani 

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1 hour ago, Jani said:

This is not a story to tell your wife!  She will not enjoy it.  I know when we've been out together and I get attention I get the "look" from her.  In the interest of peace I hold my tongue if something like this happens when I'm out alone.

 

Cheers, Jani 

Yes I did not tell her about the gentleman who is interested in me.  I did share the “fathers license“ part though.  That was good for a laugh. 

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Hey Shawna I say its best not to tell your wife, but I am also on the side of tell her. So  she can understand there's comp out there and she better pick her game up..You Feel me!!!

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I am lmao over this thread! I can only hope to have that happen to me, of course I would want it to be a woman!

,

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