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A good question


JustineM

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My wife and I where discussing my transition the other day and she posed an interesting question to me.

 

”If I could transition to the point where I had to deal with periods and possible pregnancy, would I still feel the same about transitioning?”

 

For me, Yes. All the downs that go with it I would still want to transition, because it’s better than the battles with myself in my head. 
 

Just wondered what everyone else’s thoughts are on this. 

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I've never wanted kids, and periods would be a nuisance.  But, for the chance to be myself, yes, absolutely.

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Absolutely. No question. I'm a little sad that I don't get the "full experience" to be honest.

 

Hugs!

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At this time as far as i know. No medical intervention would let me bare children or have periods.

 

We are very lucky women after the operation that we dont get these things. How lucky we are?

 

Would i still have the GRS if it came with the full package? It comes with the territory. I think i would. But would have reservations and plenty of Ibuprofen to hand.

 

But also ladies who take birth control in some circumstances DO NOT have periods or at least period pain. So consider it being just like a woman on birth control. until menopause hits

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Yep  I'm in for the full meal deal if possible too.

I found a huge amount of envy every time one of my children were conceived and birthed.  Not being the one to carry and birth them.  Something I know that will never be but one can dream.

 

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I have children but had no desire to carry or birth them.  That said, I transitioned at an age where I am beyond periods and pregnancy!  

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If I was younger, yah I would like to have the whole experience. I feel that having a baby would the the ultimate of womanhood. The maternal instinct kicked in a few months back. I found myself wanting to have a baby. When I told my cousin she said "no you don't!"

I now have a toy chihuahua, she's my baby.

 

Hugs to all,

Brandi

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5 hours ago, JustineM said:

”If I could transition to the point where I had to deal with periods and possible pregnancy, would I still feel the same about transitioning?”

I would not feel the same.  I would feel even more certain that I wanted to transition.  To be able to transition completely would be a literal dream come true for me, and I wouldn't even need to think about it.  For even a moment.

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5 hours ago, JustineM said:

”If I could transition to the point where I had to deal with periods and possible pregnancy, would I still feel the same about transitioning?”

Without any doubt, neither periods or pregnancy would’ve prevented me from transitioning.

 

52 minutes ago, MetaLicious said:

I would feel even more certain that I wanted to transition.  To be able to transition completely would be a literal dream come true for me, and I wouldn't even need to think about it.  For even a moment.

I’m in this camp.  I would've done anything to carry a child if I was younger.  I’ve always had and felt a maternal instinct even before transition. I love babies and the idea of being a mom.  Of course, the periods would have been bothersome but a critical part of life as a fertile woman. Sadly, this part of womanhood is never going to be a possibility in my lifetime.  I’m still grateful that medical technology has helped me get as far along as it has.

 

Susan R?

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Hmmm, interesting points. But i think I would take the whole package if that was a downside, which I dont believe it is. But even better, if I could choose my gender at birth I wouldnt have had to transition at all.

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I think it would make me pause for consideration, but I'd likely go forward regardless.  It's an interesting hypothetical though.

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I have triplet 2 year olds at home, its quite a handful as you can imagine. But I wouldnt change a thing, I would gladly go forward.

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Wow thank you for all the responses ladies. I had honestly never thought about that until she asked me. But all the inconvenience of periods would be a small price to pay against being myself. Not entirely sure how I would feel about being pregnant but hey it comes with the territory. 

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late to party. I don't know ...I love kid. I voluntary  with at risk  kids as coach and actives  for 10years.  I saw or seen my  mom and other moms struggle, how hard my mom  and other moms how to work just to  survive and on top of that the pain every once in a while they would endure in their  bodys  I am on the fence I truly want to be a woman but I am freaking out about get bottom...Huh..now I questioning myself..

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I almost take offense to the question, due to what is implicit in it.  The question seems to suggest the price of being a woman is higher than that of being a man.  The problem is much is not taken into account here.

 

First, let me say that is it not that i desire to be a woman.  I am a woman.  My struggle is not to become something other than i am.  It is to release what has always been there.  Yes, the real me has been hidden behind survival mechanisms that have allowed me to exist in a cis male world.  The me that is true has been restrained by a bunch of habits to disguise the inner part of me, and make it appear to resemble the outward.  I also do not doubt my inner girl's growth has been stunted by the complicated mess that is being male at birth, but struggling against that.  My challenge is not to become her, but to heal her.  There is no question to endure pregnancy and its risks and the accompanying discomfort that goes with that would be accepted, if necessary.  If periods and pregnancy is the price of being authentically me, then so be it.

 

As it is most of us have survived a great deal of discomfort in other forms.  How many of us have worked traditionally male jobs, with its accompanying pain (and often ongoing string of minor physical injuries) and exhaustion?  How many of us have spent many days and hours feeling guilty, defective, and longing for what has seemed so out of reach?  How many of us have lost friends and have estranged family, and have endured the pain that goes with that?  What of the risks of HRT, and the surgeries that often go with transition?  What of the pain of recovery?  What of the work of changing a voice permanently deepened by testosterone so we aren't clocked and treated differently?

 

I think anyone willing to go through all that is transition and all its pain and risk has demonstrated sufficiently their commitment to being genuinely themselves.  The idea that somehow after all that we would allow periods and pregnancy to deter us seems absurd to me.

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This topic highlights the extremely negative view of the female body that is ingrained in modern culture.  The ability to produce and feed babies is seen as a hinderance, that limits the ability of a woman to do "proper" manly activities. 

 

Until such time as people factories become the norm, we should be extremely thankful for the male and female reproductive systems, without which, none of us would be here.

 

Robin.

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I had a similar exchange with my ex wife. She gave me the " can't have your cake and eat it too" argument. I told her that if having periods and all that was what it took to feel comfortable in my own skin, then I would just deal with it like every other (cis)woman. 

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I would jump at that chance no matter what to be myself even kind of wishing it could be true 

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On 4/25/2020 at 2:51 AM, michelle_kitten said:

I almost take offense to the question, due to what is implicit in it.  The question seems to suggest the price of being a woman is higher than that of being a man.  The problem is much is not taken into account here.

 

First, let me say that is it not that i desire to be a woman.  I am a woman.  My struggle is not to become something other than i am.  It is to release what has always been there.  Yes, the real me has been hidden behind survival mechanisms that have allowed me to exist in a cis male world.  The me that is true has been restrained by a bunch of habits to disguise the inner part of me, and make it appear to resemble the outward.  I also do not doubt my inner girl's growth has been stunted by the complicated mess that is being male at birth, but struggling against that.  My challenge is not to become her, but to heal her.  There is no question to endure pregnancy and its risks and the accompanying discomfort that goes with that would be accepted, if necessary.  If periods and pregnancy is the price of being authentically me, then so be it.

 

As it is most of us have survived a great deal of discomfort in other forms.  How many of us have worked traditionally male jobs, with its accompanying pain (and often ongoing string of minor physical injuries) and exhaustion?  How many of us have spent many days and hours feeling guilty, defective, and longing for what has seemed so out of reach?  How many of us have lost friends and have estranged family, and have endured the pain that goes with that?  What of the risks of HRT, and the surgeries that often go with transition?  What of the pain of recovery?  What of the work of changing a voice permanently deepened by testosterone so we aren't clocked and treated differently?

 

I think anyone willing to go through all that is transition and all its pain and risk has demonstrated sufficiently their commitment to being genuinely themselves.  The idea that somehow after all that we would allow periods and pregnancy to deter us seems absurd to me.

I just want to say how much I agree.  How does anyone think this is "easy" and painless not to mention costly and terribly difficult in our  transphobic culture. *Ok its slightly better but still...   It maybe that she thinks this is a fetish or mental illness or?  A way to lurk in bathrooms?  Its so not.  I would say to focus on the fact that its not (any longer) considered a mental health issue.  If its a fetish its got to be one whale of one considering how men are so concerned about the parts you can't wait to have removed and the other rearranged.  I would focus on the medical aspect and maybe say you wish this wasn't hard on her (or anyone else)  which for some of us is the most difficult aspect.  Good luck!  Try to keep things limbic with her.  Letting that go makes this so much harder I think.

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On 4/24/2020 at 10:40 AM, JustineM said:

My wife and I where discussing my transition the other day and she posed an interesting question to me.

 

”If I could transition to the point where I had to deal with periods and possible pregnancy, would I still feel the same about transitioning?”

 

For me, Yes. All the downs that go with it I would still want to transition, because it’s better than the battles with myself in my head. 
 

Just wondered what everyone else’s thoughts are on this. 

 

Easy answer -- if there existed a wand or potion that would instantly and irreversibly give me a fully female body with all that goes with it... I'd wave that wand like I was in a school flag corps or guzzle that potion like shots on spring break in Florida.

 

In other words...YES!!

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2 hours ago, Wichita said:

I'd wave that wand like I was in a school flag corps or guzzle that potion like shots on spring break in Florida

That's funny! Wichita
Me too!!

Kay

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I was quite jealous of my wife while she was pregnant, she loved being pregnant and although the birthing process was very hard on her, I'd have taken her place in a heartbeat. so for me. yes, the total package would be ultimately fulfilling.

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