New to this site...and a little overwhelmed!

[D'vorah]

Hi everyone! D'vorah is the name I'm thinking of adopting, so I'm going with that for now (it means "bee" in Hebrew). I'm a 40 year-old Jewish trans-femme AMAB person currently using they/them pronouns and identifying as non-binary, but I'm also having serious doubts as to whether or not I'm actually a trans woman, or whether being a trans woman is simply one important part of a multi-part gender experience. I'm almost certainly going to be starting estrogenic/anti-androgenic HRT in the very near future, and I'm feeling a mixture of excitement, relief, and joy but also nervousness and some fear around health effects (primarily cardiovascular, as heart disease is a serious issue effecting AMAB folks on both sides of my family). I'm also starting to seriously consider bottom surgery but want to give HRT some time first. 

 

I'm on this site in part because I want to learn from other trans women and non-binary trans-femme folk about their transition process, specifically around starting HRT, bottom surgery, feminization processes, and navigating work and family while transitioning. I'm primarily here because I recognize how important it is to have community as a trans person, and I want to connect with other rad trans folk who are in various stages of their own transition. One of my biggest ongoing struggles is with imposter syndrome - I've been "out" as non-binary for over three years, but it wasn't until recently that I was even able to fully embrace the term "transgender" for myself. Being in non-monogamous relationship and having past and present partners who affirm my femininity has been huge, and friends in the trans community have likewise been affirming of my trans-ness even when I have not. I want to expand this community and also be an affirming, supportive witness for others. 

 

Other stuff about me...I'm a mental health counselor, musician, and activist doing occasional volunteer work for environmental justice and mental health equity. I'm vegan, I love to garden, I'm a huge reading and book nerd, and I'm into all kinds of physical activity including biking, running and hiking. 

 

Hope that's not too long of an introduction! I look forward to connecting, learning and continuing to walk this path, wherever it may lead. 

 

[Jackie C.]

Salutations @D'vorah!

 

Welcome to TransPulse! We're good at support and answering questions so you'd off to a good start. I hope you find what you're looking for here!

 

Hugs!

[Bri2020]

Welcome D'vorah!

I think you will find a lot of support and answers here. I know I have.  Thanks for the full intro though, it sounds like we have a lot of similar interests. Gardening, bikes (don't ride anymore due to back injury but raced back in the day) environmental advocacy, and while I'm not very musically inclined I've made some beautiful instruments.  Totally jealous of those who can play well . Welcome again!

[Carolyn Marie]

Welcome to Trans Pulse, D'Vorah!  That's a pretty name.  It sounds like you're coming up with all the right questions, and going about this cautiously.  Heart disease can be an issue with HRT, but your doctor is best to guide you.  We do have folks here who have had heart problems who still transitioned.

 

Congrats on your work as an activist.  That is a noble pursuit.  Please look around the forums and post wherever the urge strikes.  We will do our best to answer all your questions.

 

HUGS

 

Carolyn Marie

[SaraAW]

Welcome D'Vorah! I think many of us have suffered imposter syndrome through our journeys. You've found the right place for community, there are so many wonderful folks here. Looking forward to learning more about your journey. Have a wonderful day! Hugs!

[KayC]

Hi D'vorah!  nice to meet you and Welcome!

On 7/20/2020 at 5:09 PM, D'vorah said:

I'm primarily here because I recognize how important it is to have community as a trans person, and I want to connect with other rad trans folk who are in various stages of their own transition

Well, you found the right place!  All the areas you mentioned are here and great people to help and share with. 

Its been enormously beneficial to me in a short time.

I think you have a unique perspective to share with others here, being where you are in the process of transition, and also being in the mental health profession.

I understand the anxiety over the "imposter syndrome", and for me that is something that I have felt I have been taught to do by society as AMAB and having to deny my dysphoria for soooo long. 

So now, I am just at the very beginning of my transition journey and just starting therapy (wherever it ends up) so I look forward to hearing more from you in the future. 

Deep breaths ... one step at a time❣️