How did you pick your new name

[Heather Shay]

I know most transgender change their names unless perhaps they already have a name like Dana or other non-gender specific - sure is a lot cheaper - but in all seriousness, nearly all cultures (I'm particularly fond of the Native Americans changing names when they assume either adulthood or some other significant life change). And transitioning is certainly a big life change.

 

I know there is a different story for each of us and I hope you will share yours.

 

In my case - Shay found me in the early 1980's and has bugged me to change my name ever since. And I went out with a girl who had a boyfriend but we went to a movie or something and I always loved her name Heather. So both names chose me and I think I'm leaning toward Heather Shay legally and Shay informally.

 

 

[Maddee]

Sounds like you know what you want.

 

I like both names.  Shay is unique.

[KathyLauren]

I wanted to keep my initials, and I didn't want to have to learn a new signature.  So Keith became Kathy, and Lawrence became Lauren.  It's probably a trivial reason, but it's me, and I like it.

[Heather Shay]

How did you arrive at your name - if I may ask - I'd love to know.

[Heather Shay]

KL - never thought of keeping same initials - glad it is you.....

 

@Ms Maddie How did you arrive at your name - if I may ask - I'd love to know.

 

[Dinaki]

I have already explained it to you dearest Shea.

 

I was baptized as Konstantinos (male) and later after my operation the Greek court ordered I change to Konstantina (Female), Dina in short, along my birth certificate which it states:

 

Sex: Female

Name: Konstantina

 

Also, my name day is May the 21st

Greek name days - calendar

[Maddee]

 

52 minutes ago, Shay said:

KL - never thought of keeping same initials - glad it is you.....

 

@Ms Maddie How did you arrive at your name - if I may ask - I'd love to know.

 

Trial & errors?

 

I've had a half dozen registered aliases and two doing-business-as DBA names.  That's just male names, and not including nicknames.

When I moved into this apt building, I met a small group of neighbors.  I was presenting obvious female and told them my name was Maddie.  It was the first thing to pop in my head when asked.  Before Maddie, I was Tomisha and Tomika online.

 

Too many people get Maddie mixed up and calling me Matt all the time.

 

I'm accepted enough, but fact is so many people feel it necessary to gender me (us?) male for their own feeling of social security. 

 

Still trying to earn my "pronouns" without correcting or asking anyone for them.

For two years I wrote down all my name ideas in my calendars.  Over 100 on the list.  Last year I changed name & gender on all legalities.  When I filled out the forms at the courthouse, I just entered the latest name on my list.

Gitana Madelyn J....

 

If I change it again,

I swear it's Maggie Thompson

 

Don't be me

[Jackie C.]

My therapist put me on the spot actually. She said, "OK, so obviously <deadname> doesn't work. What do you want me to call you?" The first name that popped into my head was a video game character I admired (Jack from Mass Effect II and III, don't judge). I softened it a little though as I'm not nearly that bad-ass.

 

Time passed and I realized that Jackie wasn't quite right so I started trying on new names. Eventually, I settled on Robyn. Partially because it works for me. Partially because I didn't want to change my first initial (and ALL my online presence). Partially because Robin is Batman's sidekick. Never Robin. ?

 

I've had people ask me. Ugh. "Why not Roberta?" My answer is always, "Because Roberta is the name you end up with when you're on the receiving end of a gypsy curse." Ick. Who would want to be saddled with that?

 

Jackie got me through some rough spots though. Because of that, I decided to keep her close. When I changed my name in September 2019, I became Robyn Jacqueline. Also my given middle name was a disaster. My father is a history geek and named me after a Scottish king.

 

Hugs!

[SaraAW]

I always used names online in video games that started with Sa or Sy. Really like the sound. Sara is one I have always liked. Was also considering Sylvia, before I discovered my M-I-L, who has the name, was a transphobic bigot. No way I was going to share a name with her. I know lots of Sarah's, so I dropped the h, to be a little more unique. Feminized my my birth name and middle names and made them both my new middle names. Don't have any hard feelings for the names, and they are family names, so I wanted to keep them in some way.

 

I've got the name change paperwork filled out, just need to find someone that is not family, who has known me for 5+ years and is close enough for me to do a very quick socially distant visit for them to sign. Then need to send in with payment and it will be done. Fairly easy to do this in Ontario, thankfully.

[Cyndee]

Cynthia was popular girls name when I was young, and has a Greek heritage. It's a name that simply resonates with me. I always like writing it, and saying it...

 

I knew I wanted that name when I transitioned pretty much right off, there was no debating, the choice was an easy one for me.

 

C

[Zoey4Trix]

I tell people mine was the last one on the list and had 4 letters like Cher.

No brainer!

?

 

 

[claire1000]

A former female colleague who I became a close friend with told me over thirty years ago that I was more a female than most women she knew, and told me that was a compliment. I just laughed it off at the time. She passed away about 12 years ago and her name was Claire, I often wonder what she would think now, I would love to have a conversation now as myself and her as to old friends.

[Heather Shay]

that is such a wonderful story..she would be so honored to know you chose her name.

[Patti Anne]

16 hours ago, Shay said:

How did you arrive at your name - if I may ask - I'd love to know.

 

I'm not sure I found mine. More like it found me. Patti was a no brainer, as it reflects a version of my birth name. Anne? WTH knows? LOL. but friends normally just call me Patti.

[Rorelai]

When I came out as Rory, I was still presenting pretty androgynously. I was working in a department store and still living in a very conservative part of central PA, so when I was choosing my name I wanted one that could be either feminine or masculine, so I wouldn't run into trouble if someone clocked me while I was at work. When I was a little kid I remember my mom watching the TV show "Gilmore girls" and so I ended up going with the name Rory after one of the main characters to still have something that could be close to my mom's heart. Of course the timeline of when I was born and when the show first aired means I'm a few years too old for my mom to have considered this name when she was pregnant with me, but that's pretty trivial in the long run. At first I would introduce myself as "[dead name], but everyone just calls me Rory" so people knew me as Rory before Rory ever was considered a girl. Now years later I'm getting ready to legally change my name, and although part of me wishes I had chosen something less ambiguously feminine, I really like my name. It's who I am, who I've become as an adult. 

[Madelyn]

For me I chose Emily Madelyn because I heard the name Emily on the show PLL a long time ago, and really liked it. It was around the time I first finally accepted who I am. Emily Madelyn was chosen much later. Madelyn is a little word play on my legal middle name. Any-who, I loved it so much that I decided to be known as Madelyn to those who know me as transgender. 
 

 

[Heather Shay]

I like it a lot.

 

[DragonflyGirl]

Isobel has always been my name for as long as I can remember. I don't know where I got it from.

 

Maybe it's from a previous incarnation!

[Tory Aoi]

Originally I wanted to be Sarah, many years ago during my first attempt at accepting myself as trans.  The name was because of two reasons 1) after my grandmother on my father's side, and 2) a girl I had a major crush on in high school was also named Sarah.  Kinda created a weird feeling so it never really stuck.

 

Fast-forward, 2007 and I was pretty big into MMOs.  Had this funny named fairy-like character Tory'll I called her (long story on how I named her).  Friends that I made in that game nicknamed me Tory.

 

Fast-forward again, end of Summer 2019, and I came up with a list of about a dozen names but Tory was sitting right at the top of that list asking me in her squeaky voice as she always does "hey, silly, why you makin' this so hard!"  And so that was that.

[Jacqui]

I looked at one of those "1000 names for your baby with associated meanings" sites.  Jacqueline means "the supplanter", just the same as my male name.  Plus it's so French and feminine.

[Elizabeth Star]

I went through a lot of names. I never used them openly or told anyone, just used them in my head. I wanted something different from anyone I'd known, yet still common. In the end, when I was making my first HRT appointment, I was asked if I had a preferred name. I panicked as 50+ different names rushed through my head. Then out of nowhere came Elizabeth. My name picked me.

[HollyElizabeth]

I picked Holly Noel because of my mother. My bday is Nov 21, and she once told me that if I had been a couple weeks late and born in December and born a girl that she was going to name me Holly Noel. I felt it fitting that my mom get to name me since I am a girl so I went with her suggestion and Holly Noel is my real name. Besides I think Holly Noel is such a pretty name.

[Heather Shay]

I agree. My mom had a names I was a girl but I forgot what it was and she passed away. I think it is so beautiful that you used the name she gave you.

[HollyElizabeth]

Thank you. I really like the name Shay, sounds exotic to me.

[Jani]

I have a niece who's middle name is Shay and her first name begins with H.  Yours is a beautiful combo too.  

For me, I never changed.