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Coming out to more friends


Heather Shay

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I came out to my wife, doctor and 2 important friends and I've decided to come out in order of importance to my life and thankfully everyone so far has been supoortive. I thought I'd share the response I got today from my longest friendship - he has been through a lot including heart surgery and an arm problem that nearly cost his arm - and he is a jounalist by profession that that was his writing and art (he's a great artist as well). He mentions another friend who went through a stroke. I have told him yet as he in deep in the midst of recovering lost ground.

 

I think my approach is working for me at least - doing it slowly. When I went through a divorce 30 years ago it really hurt how many people I thought were friends wanted nothing to do with soothing my broken heart and they found out all at the same time and I couldn't bear it and being I've had so many more life experiences and can control my destiny by controlling the information flow - I am finding for me it is much better to take it one at a time and truly open up my heart to each person individually.

 

Hope your weekend is bringing you all joy.

 

Heather Shay

 

PS - here is his response:

"

Thank you for the enlightening note.  It must have been very difficult to write.  I had no idea that you've been struggling with such weighty issues.
 
Our lives have certainly taken some challenging and unexpected turns - Bob's stroke, my heart and arm issues, and your dysphoria.  The common thread through all of this is that we have to play the hand we were dealt.  With physical therapy and determination, Bob and I are slowly regaining our lost ground.  I pray that your own therapy and determination will also steer you to a happier course.
 
I don't know where that might be, and in many ways your destination is less important to me than your happiness.  I'm here for you, no matter what you need.  If there's any help I can ever provide, it's yours.  We've been friends for 60-some years now, and I expect to remain your friend for the remainder of my days.  My love (and Susie's) is there for you and Chris both.  I respect the courage this takes for both of you.  
 
May you find the peace and happiness you both deserve.
 
All my best,"
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That is a true sign of friendship there, that regardless of what is going on, you are there for each other. That takes a lot of courage to come out to someone that means a lot to you, and that you have known for a long period of your life.

 

They are right, it doesn't matter where the journey takes you, it is your happiness that matters at the end of the day.

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thank you and I hope your journey are loaded with such a support group.

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What a wonderful message to read.  Such a good friend.  

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Wonderful to read your coming out with a long time friend has gone so well Heather.

 

May you reach that happy place where you can simply be yourself all the time.

 

Hugs

 

Cyndi

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13 hours ago, Shay said:

in many ways your destination is less important to me than your happiness

 

What a beautiful response by your friend, Heather Shay.  It shows that you each share a compassionate heart ❤️

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Thank you it does help.

I hope you are almost ready to take on the world as a truly complete beautiful young woman. I am so happy for you. Give Mattie an extra hug for me today.

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Don't forget to give Matty that extra hug.

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