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Started HRT Last Night


MirandaB

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6 hours ago, HollyNoel said:

@RhondaS OMG! I'm excit3d for your changes, I'm happy to hear they are what you want to happen. For me any change good or bad is welcome, I just want to be rid of the male self as soon as I can. For both of us we've been female all our lives but only been openly female for such a short time. I don't know about you but I wish I had done this when I was around 12 and not so late in life. Now things are harder  to change, both the people I know and my body. Anyway I'm extremely happy for you and I really hope the good changes keep coming for you. Love you Sis. Holly.

I came close to bringing up being transgender to a psychiatrist when I was 17 but chickened out and didn't start HRT until I was 36. I'm still kicking myself for this.

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Yeah @Dana Michelle @RhondaS, same here. It's a shame we had to suffer in silence because it wasn't accepted when we were younger. Makes me sad to think how I could have been happy all those years instead of being miserable trying to fit the role people thought I was born for. 

 

 

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@RhondaS I'm 52. We started about he same time in our lives. Good to know we have something else in common. Oh, BTW, I have yet to experience any pain in my breast from the HRT. I do notice my breast seem a bit more filled out. Maybe it's in my mind like wishful thinking, but then again I did just start taking blockers the other day. Maybe I will end up get the painful breasts after a couple weeks. lol

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16 hours ago, RhondaS said:

Thanks and of course I wish I had been born into an era when doing this at 12 was an option.

 

Same here! I love being an 80's girl, but I get so ridiculously envious of the millennial youtubers who got to get started so much earlier, especially before T puberty does its damage. Maybe in my next life...

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1 hour ago, Heather Nicole said:
16 hours ago, RhondaS said:

Thanks and of course I wish I had been born into an era when doing this at 12 was an option.

 

Same here! I love being an 80's girl, but I get so ridiculously envious of the millennial youtubers who got to get started so much earlier, especially before T puberty does its damage. Maybe in my next life...

 

I had times as a preteen in the early 90's where I knew I wanted to be a girl but there was no way in the world I could've brought myself to tell a parent. I'm so glad for the trans-girls today, like Jazz and some of the youtubers, but also feel so envious and old ?

 

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1 hour ago, Heather Nicole said:

Same here! I love being an 80's girl, but I get so ridiculously envious of the millennial youtubers who got to get started so much earlier, especially before T puberty does its damage. Maybe in my next life...

This fill my head with too many emotions.

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1 hour ago, ElizabethStar said:

This fill my head with too many emotions.

 

*sympathetic hugs*

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On 10/18/2020 at 2:07 PM, RhondaS said:

Hey, @Dana Michelle36 way better than 58!

It seems like it is unusual to start at that age. It seems like most people transitioning start either under age 25 or over 50.

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HI all,

I think 76 is another "unusual" age to start HRT, but that's me. Can't do much about it. I've been on E. for about two weeks. Haven't yet sprouted beautiful B cups, but I'm hoping....

 

Here's my strategy for living in the "reality/non-reality/hyper-reality" continuum, so far: I'm "transitioning at my own pace, going as far as feels right, and savoring each day, One Day at a Time."

 

This is the way I'm coping with bizzaro emotions. If I tell myself I'm going as far as ___, total transition? GCS? Boob job? FFS? throat shave? my inner voices [the "Committee"] starts reciting all the bad things I've ever thought about the whole idea, and worrying about all the bad things others will tell me too. But if I say to myself, "Ok, so stop," a wave rolls over me, saying, "Oh hell no. I like how I'm feeling."

So rather than pressuring myself to hurry up and get to some feminization "goal," I'm saying to myself, "Maybe I'll call it all off tomorrow, but I'm not going to do that today. I like the way I feel." That's how ODAT works.

~~Hugs, everybody, Lee~~

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So my next dilemma is I promised my supportive-but-still-troubled-about-what-it-means-for-her-identity wife that changes would be slow and gradual, which they are to me, but looking in the mirror and seeing more pronounced evidence of the change in my breasts and wondering if I should make sure she notices it's starting and fretting if it will trigger more angst.

 

(With our college kid doing his studies in our little house I parade around topless even less than I used to do). 

 

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  • Forum Moderator

Lee i think we all have those moments when doubt and fear creep back in.  I know i do.  Years have passed and i'm comfy in myself but perhaps i've internalized a lifetime, as well as present societal pressure. I've done what i can I as far as HRT or surgery goes.  While happy and content most of the time i know.  Each time a doubt does rise up i look at it and do my best to simply leave it behind and enjoy the day.  I'm even happy with the pert little breasts i've got.   Beyond my wildest dreams!

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

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This was a pick me up as well. Although I KNOW HRT has been wonderful for me and the best thing I have done for myself.  Those societal and a lifetime of denying creep back in and I know this is the right path for me and make sure my mind is occupied and not a devils playground.

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2 hours ago, RhondaS said:

(With our college kid doing his studies in our little house I parade around topless even less than I used to do). 

I used to hardly wear a shirt in warm weather.  But after I started HRT I was at  a daughter's place, and every one wanted to get in a backyard hot tub.  I hadn't noticed any visible changes yet, but I found I had an extreme aversion to join bare-chested.  Later she told me that she had thought that was what was going on.

These days I keep the girls covered.

But at the time I was taken by surprise by the unexpected feelings.

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14 hours ago, RhondaS said:

 

(With our college kid doing his studies in our little house I parade around topless even less than I used to do). 

 

@RhondaS
I loved going topless around the house but now that I'm out as a trans woman  I'm forbidden from not wearing a top. I keep getting told women don't go around topless. I keep insisting that it's 2020 and we woman are at the point where we should be able to go around top and braless now days if a man can. Still no go. I also try the if women can dance topless for tips that I can too. But nope.. Lol

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9 hours ago, HollyNoel said:

but now that I'm out as a trans woman  I'm forbidden from not wearing a top. I keep getting told women don't go around topless

It's some sort of rite-of-passage.

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@ElizabethStar Rite-of-passage or not it still sucks. Justb3cause I'm a woman I should still get to show my bare chest if I want to. Heck, at his point There hasn't been any changes in the breast area yet, so I don't know why until I start showing I can't be a liberated woman and not wear a top. Heck, the people at my house don't treat me like a woman, they still call me Michael instead of my name Holly. I told mom that next summer she was going to have to get used to the bikini tops. yeah thy are coming.. lol

 

Oh well, I guess I knew there would be some trade offs like not going around giving the girls some air. I guess this is just one I'm going to have to get used to. lol

 

FREE THE LADIES!

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Second visit to endocrinologist today...showed off what the boob fairy has done for me in 6 weeks. Everything seems OK. She said something like 'oh you're gonna be pretty' so I just want to visit her every few minutes to hear things like that, but don't get to see her again until March 2021. 

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Hey @RhondaS Have you noticed any more changes? I think I've noticed a huge change, I think my breast are starting to grow. I might be mistaken because I'm obese and my breast are bigger but they are flatter, but after almost two months I think they are starting to plump up just a tiny but. Instead of just being flat, they look like they are getting a tiny bit round on the sides. Also erections are gone completely. I can't get any response even trying to get a reaction. I don't even have any sex drive at all. Now when I see photos or video it's like "OK" and I move on. I really do miss sex, but I can have sex or become who I am supposed to be. I pick the latter, sex is wonderful but being a woman is so much better.

 

Anyway, I just wondered if you've noticed any new changes. Love you Girl. Holly.

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The breasts are definitely shaping up which I thought was a little early. That and the happiness are the big things so far. 

 

As for erections, they are infrequent but last time one was needed it still happened, around a week ago. 

 

Thanks for asking!

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Just my 2 cents.

 

It was about 6 weeks when things started for me. Then for another 6 weeks it was just nothing...nothing....nothing. Then one day, one of my friends pulled me aside at work and was like, um...hey....a...you gotta do something. You're kinda poking through your shirt...a lot. Seemed like they popped overnight. I was really embarrassed, it was the afternoon when she told me.

 

The fun is just starting.

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15 hours ago, HollyNoel said:

Also erections are gone completely. I can't get any response even trying to get a reaction. I don't even have any sex drive at all. Now when I see photos or video it's like "OK" and I move on. I really do miss sex, but I can have sex or become who I am supposed to be. I pick the latter, sex is wonderful but being a woman is so much better.

 

I'm very glad you're ultimately happy with the changes overall. But I still can't help rooting for your female sexuality to kick in!

 

Maybe I might be being naive, I have yet to be where you are, but just some thoughts:

 

I'm noticing you speaking of "erection", and "getting a response", and "see photos or video". These are commonly considered masculine forms of sexuality. So, I'm wondering, hoping for you, maybe that might be why you're no longer getting the response you're accustomed to getting from the same stimulus? Everything I've ever heard about female arousal suggests that it's all in the mind, rather than anything physical or visual, as it is for guys.

 

So have you tried imagining erotic scenarios? (No need to answer to me! Strictly for your own benefit!) Maybe a nice romantic novel to help set the mood? I haven't read many, at all, but I really quite enjoyed "Waking up Wed" by Christy Jeffries. It took quite awhile to finally get to the steamy parts, but...whoo!...once it did...!!!!!

 

In any case, dear Holly, in the words of one of my personal favorite heroes, "I'm pulling for you, we're all in this together!"

 

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