I Like Skirts

[Genny]

Hi,

 

I’m Genny. I was amab.

 

I have been thinking of becoming transfeminine for a few years, and the desire to make it a reality has become much stronger lately. It is confusing. I am in my 50s, I have always lived as a man, and I still feel very masculine in many ways. I’ve started buying women’s clothes for myself lately, and I’ve found I absolutely love shopping for women’s clothes, but I have always hated shopping for men’s clothes. Even just buying jeans and tshirts always seemed like a chore, and I never enjoyed trying on suits or dress clothes, and never felt comfortable or happy wearing them. But shopping for skirts and stockings and blouses and high heels is a blast! And I love wearing them! That tells me something.

 

I am thinking of starting hormone therapy, and a part of me really wants to, but I also sometimes think of just wearing the clothes and makeup without the hormone transition. I don’t think I’d ever completely identify as a “woman,” but as transfeminine, androgynous, and/or non-binary.

 

I want to start wearing makeup, but I’m feeling intimidated by the process, not knowing exactly what I need to get, the right color foundation, etc. I’m trying to learn, but so far I have not begun applying makeup.

 

I’m trying to find a gender therapist. I’ve gotten that advice here and seen it repeated many times, and I believe that is a good idea. I’ve struggled with depression my whole life, not understanding what was wrong, but I’m starting to think not being happy as a “man” has been a deep issue for me that I have been blind to (or nearly blind to) my whole life.

 

It’s good to be reading threads here in this forum. It’s a great source of information and support.

[Susan R]

2 hours ago, Genny said:

But shopping for skirts and stockings and blouses and high heels is a blast! And I love wearing them! That tells me something.

 

I am thinking of starting hormone therapy, and a part of me really wants to

Hello Genny, Wecome to the forum. Stockings, blouses and high heels do spark a few fond memories with me too. Flash forward to today and know that I eventually followed my heart’s desire. It sounds like your heading in this same direction too. It’s a long and winding road but very much worth it if you’re able to live as your true self.  It’s a big step though as the results become more permanent the longer you’re on the hormone therapy. I highly recommend following through and working with a good therapist as you mentioned you may. You’ll thank yourself if they’re good and you put in the work.

 

I’m glad you found us and have place to learn, share, and grow with us. I look forward to learning more about you and seeing your progress.

 

Warmest Regards,

Susan R?

[Genny]

Thank you, Susan!

[Guest]

@GennyI’m also in my 50’s and have just restarted down the same path. I lucky in that I have a supportive spouse to play makeup with, but we both have been hitting the YouTube videos too. I’ve also been studying what other women wear. It just takes some practice.

Having a good gender therapist is nice, but the real kicker is facial hair removal. Ouch!

Good luck on your journey and please be patient because road is long, breakdowns are common, and service stations are never around when you need them.

 

[Sandra6sandy9sand]

Hi Genny, welcome. I also love buying and wearing woman’s cloths. I live in a small town in rural Upper Michigan. I’ve purchased most of my cloths on line or in locations away from here.

 

My wife tolerates my feminine attire but that’s about it. I hope you enjoy meeting other friends here. Be safe.

 

Hugs

 

Sandra

[Audrey]

Hi @Genny, it's lovely that you're exploring gender expression through fashion and makeup! When you find a style that speaks to you and says "this is me," it's a wonderfully affirming feeling. I'll never forget the first time I put on a dress, stepped in front of the mirror, and something just clicked inside me.

I feel you that it can be intimidating, especially makeup. If I can offer any guidance, it's that you should feel free to experiment with your style and be inspired by what you see others doing. I've found that all the extra time at home during the pandemic has given me great freedom to try lots of looks and the chance to mess up safely. A supportive partner or trusted friend is a great help too. Other members here have suggested Sephora and Ulta as cosmetics brands that are friendly. The internet is a godsend if you're feeling nervous about going into a store or asking someone directly for advice.

I'm hopeful you'll find a great gender therapist as well!

 

Love,

~Audrey.

[Timber Wolf]

Hi Genny,

Welcome to Transpulse. I'm glad you're here!

 

Lots of love and a big welcome hug,

Timber Wolf?

[KathyLauren]

Hi, Genny.

 

A lot of us can relate to what you are experiencing.  I always hated wearing men's clothes.  Shopping for them was what I called "depressing" at the time, but what I would now call "dysphoric".  I would see the brightly-coloured drapey clothes across the aisle in the women's department, but I would have to buy colourless, shapeless clothes.  Buying a suit?  Sure, what shade of gray would you like?  Argh!

 

I was 61 before I had a talk with my wife and decided to do something about it.  Now, at 66, I am Kathy full-time, and my wife and I are happier than ever.

 

What you do about it is entirely up to you.  You mentioned a gender therapist, and I think that is an excellent idea.  Talking over this stuff with someone who understands will help you to decide what, if any, transition steps you want to take.

 

Regards,

Kathy

[Genny]

8 hours ago, KathyLauren said:

I would see the brightly-coloured drapey clothes across the aisle in the women's department, but I would have to buy colourless, shapeless clothes.  Buying a suit?  Sure, what shade of gray would you like?  Argh!

This made me laugh. So true! Thanks, everyone, for the welcome and thoughts.

[Jackie C.]

Hey now. Some suits are brown. ?

 

It's funny. When I came out it was like I discovered color. I have roughly a million black t-shirts leftover from "the before time" and no desire to wear any of them. Now it's all bright colors and patterns. Internalized transphobia is a heck of a drug.

 

Hugs!

[Sally Stone]

Genny, I love your observations regarding men's clothing.  In fact, I always chuckle when I see or hear the words men and fashion used together, as in: men's fashions.  Who are they kidding?  The words are pretty much mutually exclusive, an oxymoron, if you will.  I would concede that men's clothing is functional, but I stop short of calling it fashionable.

 

I have an intense feminine fashion sense, that I just can't satisfy wearing men's clothing.  Female fashions are so much more expressive and fun.? 

[Vanessa Michelle]

Welcome @Genny! It's so nice to meet you and see some of your story! I can identify with much of it myself. I am in my late 40's and am looking at the possibility of transition in the future too. ❤️