The biggest question of my life

[Andrea Jean]

Gcs is the biggest question of my life can go two ways either gcs or an orchiectomy just keep trying to make this decision and I know only I can make this decision but its really hard since I"m older 64 and have degenerative joint disease bad back ....but how did everyone come to this decision ? One way I do want gcs but guess kind of scared of it ..if I decide to not do it will be getting at least an orchiectomy to get rid of spiro at least ...

[Jackie C.]

For me there were three main reasons:

• One: My dysphoria monster wanted me to have the ability to be penetrated. I have no intention of ever using this feature with a partner, but my monster was insistent that I have the capability.
• Two: In my state, you need to have GCS if you want to change your gender marker on your permanent records (i.e. Social Security and Birth Certificate). That was a thing I absolutely wanted to do.
• Three: Bathroom laws. My state has these. If you want to use a female space in Michigan (bathrooms and changing rooms) legally, you need to have the appropriate genitala. I feel like a spider on a hot plate when I'm in the men's room and not everywhere has a unisex option. I could have had zero depth, but see reason number one. Stupid dysphoria monster.

I'd look at what you need to be happy and what your personal circumstances are (see reasons two and three) because your location matters and maybe you don't want to be a restroom commando. I admit that I've broken the restroom rule when out and about when I needed to pee, but never in a locker room. That seemed skeevy.

I should point out that the question might be out of your hands. GCS surgeons are allowed to refuse candidates on the basis of other health issues. I don't know about an orchi, but for GCS my surgeon insisted I be flat on my back for three days (though that's not universal). I don't know if that's even possible for you. You'd have to talk with whoever is going to perform the surgery.

 

Hugs!

[Bri2020]

1 hour ago, Jackie C. said:

For me there were three main reasons:

• One: My dysphoria monster wanted me to have the ability to be penetrated. I have no intention of ever using this feature with a partner, but my monster was insistent that I have the capability.
• Two: In my state, you need to have GCS if you want to change your gender marker on your permanent records (i.e. Social Security and Birth Certificate). That was a thing I absolutely wanted to do.
• Three: Bathroom laws. My state has these. If you want to use a female space in Michigan (bathrooms and changing rooms) legally, you need to have the appropriate genitala. I feel like a spider on a hot plate when I'm in the men's room and not everywhere has a unisex option. I could have had zero depth, but see reason number one. Stupid dysphoria monster.

I

 

Hugs!

I've already decided to go GCS when eligible for almost these exact same reasons.

1.  Same as Jackie # 1 but also that thing dangling down there is a constant reminder of my dead life and triggers me.

2. I'm lucky that I don't have document issues in my resident state (Virginia), or my birth place (NYC) so #2 N/A

3. I don't have bathroom laws in my state but I don't feel comfortable in either bathroom because while I do ID as a woman and have zero T in my system, I still have male parts. I don't feel safe in either right now. More importantly, I travel a lot, including internationally and there are a lot of places it's downright dangerous feeling for me right now in this in between stage. Add to this the Spiro effect of having to go every hour or so......

4. I spend a lot of time in the water/beaches/pools and really want to be able to wear women's bathing attire without being clocked. I scuba and getting in and out of wetsuits AND keeping things in place would be impossible.  Once again, places I go may be less safe in those situations. I.E. Indonesia, some Caribbean islands, Mexico,/Central America.

[VickySGV]

I did not have my GCS until I was 65 in 2013, I will be celebrating my 8th re-birthdate in two weeks.  I had high blood pressure, diabetes and a strange little blood condition, but my surgeon ( Marci Bowers) said that as long as the hospital staff knew from my chart that I would be a reasonable candidate.  I do have my days when I wonder if I could have lived without it, but that is mostly the daily care and feeding of neovaginas and a few little yeast and UTI infections that sneak in on me.  8 years ago it was a little harder to get going.  I required a re-finance of my mortgage since my insurance did not cover it in 2013, but did cover it the next year.  OK, that's the way that mop flopped.  The surgery was a goal from my beginning and I do not regret a bit of it, and have had some good adventures after it.  One thing I did learn though is what surgery DOES NOT do, and needed a little time with a therapist.  I will not encourage anyone to have it either, but have gone up 600+ miles to help a couple of friends in the days right after their surgery.

 

Once I began my 24/7 Transition I used female bathrooms or better yet, all gender rooms which we do have in Calif. where I live.  I am an older woman and I do not have the problems younger women do.  I have been chased away from men's restrooms and never had a problem in women's rooms.  It is men worried about the women's rest rooms that give us trouble, not the women that I have ever come across unless they are super afraid of the man outside the restroom.  Do, obey the laws where you live though. .

[Audrey]

I'm a long way from gender confirmation surgery, but even this early on in my transition, I'm confident I will want it - no, I will need it. For me, it really does boil down to the dysphoria as others are describing here. I have *always* felt uncomfortable in my intimate relationships because of my male anatomy; the act itself felt wrong and I'm quite sure my partners knew it too. This might sound strange, but I need my body to match my identity in order to be truly intimate with a partner. That said, I have many months of HRT, full-time living, and medical/psychological clearances to get through before I make the decision to have the surgery. But it's hard to imagine I will change my mind about this, and I know I will do everything in my power to get to that goal.

Wishing you the best as you reach your decision, @Andrea Jean!

 

Love,

~Audrey.

[Andrea Jean]

4 hours ago, Jackie C. said:

For me there were three main reasons:

• One: My dysphoria monster wanted me to have the ability to be penetrated. I have no intention of ever using this feature with a partner, but my monster was insistent that I have the capability.
• Two: In my state, you need to have GCS if you want to change your gender marker on your permanent records (i.e. Social Security and Birth Certificate). That was a thing I absolutely wanted to do.
• Three: Bathroom laws. My state has these. If you want to use a female space in Michigan (bathrooms and changing rooms) legally, you need to have the appropriate genitala. I feel like a spider on a hot plate when I'm in the men's room and not everywhere has a unisex option. I could have had zero depth, but see reason number one. Stupid dysphoria monster.

I'd look at what you need to be happy and what your personal circumstances are (see reasons two and three) because your location matters and maybe you don't want to be a restroom commando. I admit that I've broken the restroom rule when out and about when I needed to pee, but never in a locker room. That seemed skeevy.

I should point out that the question might be out of your hands. GCS surgeons are allowed to refuse candidates on the basis of other health issues. I don't know about an orchi, but for GCS my surgeon insisted I be flat on my back for three days (though that's not universal). I don't know if that's even possible for you. You'd have to talk with whoever is going to perform the surgery.

 

Hugs!

Number one is my biggest one also the others are not a issue  in my state at all and bathrooms haven't done yet but have friends and wife that will be taking me into them for a while to get use to them and also would like to look better in a swimsuit also....laying flat on my back for three days might be an issue with me so guess I need to find a surgeon to ask there opinion on my health issues if I can't will just do an orchi but still number one is a big issue with me ..

[VickySGV]

2 hours ago, Andrea Jean said:

.laying flat on my back for three days might be an issue with me so guess I need to find a surgeon to ask there opinion on my health issues

 

I had to get out of bed to start walking at 36 hours per my doctor's orders, so the laying in bed is something that varies with the Surgeon you have. 

[Kylie]

I really knew from a young age I was totally misaligned with my anatomy. So I knew it was the right decision for me. It has now been almost 5 months since my operation, despite the hiccups along the way, I’m totally thankful for my new body! It is a tough decision to make, not only from a financial stand point, but recovery is long! It really is a YMMV type situation, but I’ve had a bumpy recovery...thankfully the rocks in the road are decreasing!

[Mmindy]

3 hours ago, Kylie said:

thankfully the rocks in the road are decreasing!

I'm glad you're doing well and know the road will be smoothing out for you. 

 

Best wishes, stay positive, and healthy,

 

Mindy???

[Elizabeth Star]

On 12/23/2020 at 2:37 PM, Jackie C. said:

One: My dysphoria monster wanted me to have the ability to be penetrated. I have no intention of ever using this feature with a partner, but my monster was insistent that I have the capability.

I'm with Jackie on this but my mind does wander sometimes.

 

Thankfully my state allows you to use whatever bathroom you identify with because there is no way I'm going into a men's room again. I can also stay away from locker rooms, for the next couple of years, if I have to.

 

I'll never feel like myself without GCS.

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Guest]

On 12/25/2020 at 3:02 PM, Kylie said:

I really knew from a young age I was totally misaligned with my anatomy. So I knew it was the right decision for me. It has now been almost 5 months since my operation, despite the hiccups along the way, I’m totally thankful for my new body! It is a tough decision to make, not only from a financial stand point, but recovery is long! It really is a YMMV type situation, but I’ve had a bumpy recovery...thankfully the rocks in the road are decreasing!

I have not had any surgical procedures, however, I totally agree with you about knowing from a young age. My only regret is not pursuing this when I was your age. Back then, unless you had a huge wad of cash, it did not happen. I love every change I am going through now. I am looking to line up the surgical care so that in 8-12 months I can have all the foundation for GAS around this time next year. I very much appreciate all of the information you have given me.

Sincerely

Katie