Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Hello My name is Rania


Rania

Recommended Posts

Hi Everyone 

 

My name of choice is Rania, yet still not formally used yet. I was born and raised in the middle east, in a country that is renowned for having strict religious practices and forcing women to have specific dressing code and until recently was not allowing them even to drive . I was born in Saudi Arabia.

 

My family was very religious, they followed all religious rules strictly like segregating boys and girls in a very early age, taking them to study religion in mosques and private institutions, thus I memorized these instructions at a very young age. However, at that young age as well, I had strong feeling that there was something wrong with me, It was a feeling of incompletion and fear of future. 


I started noticing at the age of 8 may be, my strong tendency to wear my sister clothes, play with them and also noticed a growing sense of upset because I couldnt grow my hair or wear glamorous dress like they do, two years later I tried my first suicide attempt by drowing myself into a bath tub, I believed that coming to this world in this form is a mistake and I should go back to were I was so that I can come again as girl, that attempt failed. six months later I tried my second attempt to cut my private parts and that also failed. 

 

My parents took these incidents lightly as I did not confess anything to them, day after day I started noticing my sisters growing breasts while mine are small and shows no signs of growing up, it was very upsetting to me yet I thought mybe they eat more for their breasts to grow, so I started overeating in hope for my breasts to grow, yet alas it was my belly that started growing, so I had no chance but to ask for consulation and who is the best consultant at this time, it was my science teacher at school. and he told me that the reason you do not experience these changes is because of your private parts 

 

I hated them ( my private parts ) and did everything I could to hurt them, yet I kept growing up and started having a beard, muscles, .. etc as if my identity is running away and fading out in the shadows of my masculinity.

 

Today and after 37 years of struggle, I travelled to Germany and hope to start my Journey !! 

 

Pleased to meet you all and hope to learn more in this forum .

 

Rania

Link to comment
  • Root Admin

Hello Rania,

 

Welcome to TransgenderPulse. Thank you for sharing your story with us.  :)

 

MaryEllen

Link to comment
1 hour ago, MaryEllen said:

Hello Rania,

 

Welcome to TransgenderPulse. Thank you for sharing your story with us.  :)

 

MaryEllen

 

Thank you so much MaryEllen :) Bless your heart

Link to comment

Welcome Rania! I am happy you found this forum & also that you have found a place you can freely explore your feminine self!

 

Hugs!

Delcina

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator
6 hours ago, Rania said:

Today and after 37 years of struggle, I travelled to Germany and hope to start my Journey !! 

Congratulations @Rania. This is great news and the beginning of the end to that old battle within. I’m wish you success on your upcoming journey. Knowing your on the right path is half the battle. We’re here for you and support you in your journey. Feel free to reach out with questions and provide us updates as to your progress if you like. 

 

Best of luck,

Susan R?

Link to comment
13 hours ago, Delcina B said:

Welcome Rania! I am happy you found this forum & also that you have found a place you can freely explore your feminine self!

 

Hugs!

Delcina

 

Thank you so much for this kind opportunity :) bless you

Link to comment
7 hours ago, Stefi said:

 

  •  
  • Member
  •  
  • 22 posts
  • Gender: Transgender
  • Country: United%20States.gif
  • State/Province: Illinois.gif

Welcome @Ranie. You are among friends here. 

 

Rania,  Sorry about the misspelling of your name. 

 

 

Stefi

 

Pleased to meet you Stefi , 

 

No worries I misspell it also sometimes ?

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Welcome Rania.  I'm glad you have joined cus here but also sad that you had to leave your home to be yourself.  Unfortunately too many of us have lost homes and family at least temporarily.  Hopefully time will heal those wounds and perhaps even give others the gift of accepting us.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Hi Rania,

Welcome to Transpulse. I'm glad you're here!

 

I wish you all the best on your journey.

 

Lots of love and a big welcome hug,

Timber Wolf?

Link to comment
15 hours ago, Susan R said:

Congratulations @Rania. This is great news and the beginning of the end to that old battle within. I’m wish you success on your upcoming journey. Knowing your on the right path is half the battle. We’re here for you and support you in your journey. Feel free to reach out with questions and provide us updates as to your progress if you like. 

 

Best of luck,

Susan R?

 

Honestly , It was tough decision. I fought against it for years even I took T hormone , hoping that it would end my misery !! yet I do not regret taking it, and sure once I start my journey I will share my updates . at the moment I trying to find a therapist in Germany inorder to being the process !! 

 

Bless you my dear 

Link to comment
2 hours ago, Timber Wolf said:

Hi Rania,

Welcome to Transpulse. I'm glad you're here!

 

I wish you all the best on your journey.

 

Lots of love and a big welcome hug,

Timber Wolf?

????

 

Bless you Timber 

Link to comment
1 hour ago, Jandi said:

Welcome Rania

 

Thank you Jandi , I am truly pleased to be a part of this amazing family ?

Link to comment
14 hours ago, Confused1 said:

Welcome to TransPulse Rania. We will support you any way we can.

 

Hugs,

Mike

 

Thank you Mike , Bless you ??

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   9 Members, 0 Anonymous, 130 Guests (See full list)

    • MAN8791
    • MaybeRob
    • Abigail Genevieve
    • Willow
    • Adrianna Danielle
    • Ivy
    • April Marie
    • RaineOnYourParade
    • Ashley0616
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.7k
    • Total Posts
      769.1k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,049
    • Most Online
      8,356

    LostAndForgotten
    Newest Member
    LostAndForgotten
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Adamtoeve
      Adamtoeve
      (38 years old)
    2. Andy C.
      Andy C.
      (22 years old)
    3. Asher the Enby Goddex
      Asher the Enby Goddex
      (23 years old)
    4. camerashy
      camerashy
      (52 years old)
    5. Stacy S.
      Stacy S.
      (55 years old)
  • Posts

    • Lydia_R
      Thanks for your thoughtful reply @RaineOnYourParade.  I totally understand and agree with what you said.  I'm in no way proposing a law to decrease population.  It must be done on the demand side.  My role in this is simply to be highly visible and inspiring on many different levels and cultures from around the world.   We tend to focus on changing laws and that is addressing things on the supply side.  If we make a law to tax a type of business to try to steer the economy, we are changing the supply side.  People don't think of politics as a demand side thing, but our leaders should be inspiring us to change our behaviors.  Like the motto I was taught in the Navy "lead by example".  Although I could have tried to do this all with my music, I was not going to be successful with that.  It's reasonable to try to have a career as a highly visible politician to lead like this.   I never had any children that I know about.  I've had a pretty fabulous life.  Lots of ups and downs.  Lots of adventures.  Because I wasn't watching TV and I wasn't having children, I had to fill my time with something.  Although I am super ambitious with this political thing, all I really want to do is cook a nice curry dinner and have an intimate evening playing music for/with a partner and/or a friend or two.  And of course I enjoy cleaning the house and doing some writing, math and things.  I try to give back to society, but I'm not one of these people who just wants to serve.   It's very encouraging what the younger generation is doing in my opinion.  It's rough around the edges and I feel we could be more intentional about things.  Since population is declining, and I'm suggesting it to decline even more, we'll have this problem of there not being enough young people to take care of the old people.  I'm very strong on protecting our younger generation from having to babysit old people.  There simply aren't enough of them to do it like it is being done now.  I think this population reduction stuff is so important and this younger generation is just inheriting all these realities that I want to totally get them out of the business of taking care of older people.  The idea is to get medications mailed to them.  Make doctor visits very short and sweet.  Get old people staffing old folks homes.  I think we have a huge problem with mental health treatment in this country.  I think our economic realities from greater automation and income disparity have lead too many people to fall into despair.  We have to do something with our time and if we get rid of jobs with automation, and we stop making making housing (a decreasing population doesn't need more housing), then we still have to do something with our time.  I was successful at fighting addiction with relatively low carbon emitting work.  I make apps on the computer and record music in my living room.  I don't own a car.  I've been working part time from home for 12 years.  I actually work an excessive amount to do politics like this, but I have had periods of downtime.     Totally!  I think that humanity is just going to go in reverse here and these rural areas are going to be popular with younger people.  Set them up with some wind turbines.  Adjust to not having power 24/7.  Plenty of space to grow food.  Keep up the roads well enough to truck in some grains and other supplies.  As long as climate change doesn't cause some kind of environmental or insect problem, I think these rural places are going to be great.  I think we'll have to pick and choose which ones to continue supporting and which ones to abandon.  There are always details to work out.   I think in a world that is aging with declining population, people who are more unhealthy are going to be moving towards the cities and people who are healthier and middle age will move to the suburbs.  The suburbs are OK places as long as you are strong enough to get around by bicycle.  As someone who is 53 and physically fit, I groove on the idea of those big houses in the suburbs becoming house parties.  Perhaps I'm just dreaming though! LOL!   @awkward-yet-sweet is making some interesting points here.  My first wife did concrete work on the freeways in Chicago.  They do that up there because the extreme cold cracks the asphalt.  Those freeways are annoying with all the bumping between joints, but the roads last a long time.  But it takes a lot of industrial heat to make concrete.  Yes, humanity got along without the paved roads before and we can do it again.  We all inherited this world the way it is.  Sure, us older people contributed to it as well, but this whole industrialization/globalization thing has been going on a long time.  Perhaps we will avoid the horse and buggy thing and do a lot of mountain biking?
    • Vidanjali
      To be the witness Of thoughts, words, deeds done by Thee, Dispassionately.
    • VickySGV
      Sounds like time for a new Body Technician hopefully one that is actually a Doctor Of Medicine, this one you describe is short of that mark.
    • Ladypcnj
      Hi Lydia, I had McAfee before on my other computer and it allowed over 19 viruses to come in yikes lol
    • Ladypcnj
      I've been seeing my new treating doctor for quite some time now, whenever I'm advised to make an appointment. When it comes to seeing a new treating doctor, hard part is starting all over again building trust between patient and doctor. On my first day seeing my new treating doctor, before I could say anything else to her, she explained to me I needed to be completely honest with her. I kind of expected that type of patient profiling response from her, since she doesn't specialize in intersex care. Anyway, I sat down in the chair as I explained to my new doctor, I don't have all of my hospital records, certain records from my childhood and teenager years are mysteriously missing regarding a surgery. After my examination was over, she disregarded or showed no interest in searching for my missing medical records, but instead she blamed me for how I take care of my health today. 
    • April Marie
      Saturday night @ 9PM Eastern.   PM @Susan R to be added to the list.  
    • Mmindy
      Yes, I will be volunteering at my city's PRIDE EVENTS, and attending several other events in the communities around my area.   Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋
    • KymmieL
      Had a customer bring in her Subie for struts. I ordered fronts. later yesterday, the boss called me into the shop. the proceeds to say I ordered the wrong ones, the fronts instead of rears. Then today I got looking I did order the right ones the first time. All the paper work that I have says front even the last work order said fronts. I told the other boss. So, Have I gotten a sorry from the boss. Ha, ha, not yet. I am doubting I will ever get one.   Oh, well. life goes on.   Kymmie
    • Emily Chen
      Any incoming zoom meeting?
    • RaineOnYourParade
      While I agree with a lot of the campaign personally, I don't think a government-mandated reduction in childbirth is really necessary. As a young person, I hardly know anyone who wants to be a parent in the future. I think a lot of people will either be waiting a while or not having kids at all, meaning that the number of kids being born will probably decrease. Overcrowding's also mostly an urban issue -- plenty of places in rural America have plenty of space for both people and growing food.    Of course, everyone sees things differently, so I won't necessarily say you're wrong. I just think my generation is a lot less inclined to the family mindset than some that came before us. 
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      To me, it sounds like a solution searching for a problem.  I believe in the Russian perspective, that oil is abiotic and likely under every part of the Earth's surface.  There's plenty.  "Peak oil" and "climate" are excuses for government control.   As for roads, we use asphalt because tar and bitumen are a byproduct of fuel production, not the other way around.  Asphalt is not a great material, really.  It can also be recycled somewhat and used again.  Notice how road crews grind down existing asphalt into powder? Concrete is a better material for roads.  But in areas like where I live, very little of our roads are paved.  Gravel is a luxury, and a lot of roads are mud.  Same in many "developing" nations.  Pavement is better for transport, but its not like we would die without it.  Lack of pavement might actually be a good thing, as people might stay home more and food might be grown locally instead of relying on transportation.  It would stop this wacky idea of growing everything in California.     I believe the big crisis we face is globalism and government control.  Proposing some scheme to control our families? That's just more of the same.  Even if folks managed to get enough votes (or rig enough elections) to get the power to do that, it won't be as VP or president of the USA in its current 50-state form.  
    • VickySGV
      The months of June has already been planned out for me with only minimal time for sleep between the Trans Chorus Of Los Angeles and the various communities around me that are in the service area of the LGBTQ  Center I was on the Board of Directors of that are having Pride Events, both LGBTQ Pride and Trans Pride stand alone events.
    • Justine76
      Very cool. I've been clumsily navigating the world of makeup so this may help. Some of the tutorials on YouTube are so advanced, they may as well be speaking Klingon :P  
    • Lydia_R
      I've realized that our laptops are using much less plastic than they used to.  They are smaller devices that use less raw materials and are easier to ship and hold up better in shipping than bigger computers with removable parts.  They seem to have gotten rid of the overheating/fan problem for the most part, but there is a performance hit for that.  I use a 10yo desktop computer with a moderate level gaming video card to run 3 monitors.  I'm a producer though and most consumers have no need for that.   I really haven't watched TV since the 80's.  I spend some time researching on the internet and then I spend a lot of time meditating on the objects in my environment and on the streets.  From living on the streets for a year, I've learned that people can say anything and can control you, but the laws of physics and mathematics are outside of that and really even transcend time itself.  After people would not support my music, I built my life as a software engineer based on mathematics and engineering.  I've had a moderately successful career with that and have written code for many different industries.   The problem with stopping oil usage is that if we still need the bitumen to pave our roads and shingle our houses, then what do we do with the gas when we refine it?  There are natural deposits of bitumen, but you know, with so many people out there, demand is huge and we are using this stuff up.  If you grow corn for corn syrup, then what do you do with the cobs?  We've shipped coffee and bananas all over the world.  We took material from those environments.  What do we do now?  How long can it last?
    • Mmindy
      @Lydia_R I know you're doing the best you can, and I wish you the best.   Hugs,   Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...