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Visible confusion


Liam de potato

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Er yea this time i'm confused but it's different than usual

lemme explain

Mom got a new pair of high heels but sadly for her it was too big (my size)

I never wore high heels before and as a kid I actually wanted some for whatnot reason, was it to be like "other girls" like why i wanted make up is it simply "a lil girl's dream" i-don't-know

so anyway for whatnot reason i put them on and, well in a  way it was fun I almost felt well idk how ifelt exactly. i feel wierd. I still wanted to cry but i definetly didn't feel that feeling i call dysphoria cus I think it is. So i thought, maybe I don't feel like a dude anymore mb it's just an obscession to be a boy like when I was a kid, mb i grew up (not in a bad way more in a my hormones got regulated aand that sounds wrong). So i tried the remaining dress I had and no dysphoria. Just feeling like I look like my grandma, a girl and a bit of this is not who i am. I cried too but what if it's just cus my brain got the idea strongly inside that I was a trans dude.

I now want to experiience more, try more stuff (weirdly i feel like a trans girl wanting to experience "girl stuff" if that doesn't sound bad.

i even want to go at school and try (of course I'll have clothes in my bag in case) i just, i dunno, i did got able to ask for therapy to my parents but we won't be able aslong as there's a lockdown (cus I wuldn't feel comfortable in distance) so idk i can't really ask a therapist or anything i'm just stuck in this bubble again but it's all new

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1 hour ago, Liam de potato said:

I now want to experiience more, try more stuff (weirdly i feel like a trans girl wanting to experience "girl stuff" if that doesn't sound bad.

 

That my friend, is a brilliant idea. Try it out. See how you feel. See what feels right. Keep an open mind and and open heart. Try everything that you think might be interesting or fun. It'll help you figure out what you want and what you need going forward.

 

Happy experimenting! (Also, short guys totally wear lifts. They don't CALL them heels but we all know what they are.)

 

Hugs!

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1 hour ago, Jackie C. said:

They don't CALL them heels but we all know what they are.)

duh XD
but yea thanks hough that was definetly high heels XD but yea I'll see thanks.. I mean i ave to, don't really have the choice, I wish I just knew, I mean, I know life would be boring if u know everything about u but i just want to know who i am, the worst is that a lot of people do (in a gender way) so i feel like it's unfair

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I know right? The owner's manual just leaves out so many important things... On top of all that, I was bundled with the wrong one and the manufacturer refuses to honor the warranty. Don't even get me started on tech support... ?

 

Hugs!

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