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Breaking blue


Mx.Drago

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A small moment, still.

Steps too small to fill.

Dive deeper into glass

Satisfaction deeper past.

I need a break.

Further to reach blue

Darkness beneath touch.

So long as I remain,

I need to break.

Again I sink,

Sunk in eyes

Barely a wink.

Driven deeper awake, 

In nightmares snare,

I blink fire searing

Teary eyes, blood shot.

Little given to care

Snearing a smeared dot.

Why... must peace ask,

For such a price.

If only sleep

Can break the blue 

That threatens to drown

Me with every move.

If only breaking blue

Would free one so.

Allowing one the rest,

Life one yearns.

 

 

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  • 4 weeks later...

Inevitably it happens.

 

This whole empathy thing is yet another curse.

You care and you try and you just can’t please everyone.

 

You find that everyone is Not like you.

And it’s all understandable.

Others are also trying to make their way through this life.

 

Some have it easier due to circumstances, say good fortune,

While others live in misery due to misfortune.

Empaths are cursed with trying to correct this.

 

The cynics are quick to say that they’ve made their choices.

That people can will themselves to a better place.

They simply choose to live in squalor or pain.

 

Dreamers on the other hand have an unending spring of hope.

They believe bad is only a transitory state on the way to good.

 

So why is it so?

Why are some so inflexible that they must circle others with their values?

This desire to change something free and dam it to achieve some purpose.

 

In Easy, Lionel Ritchie sings:

 

Why in the world

Would anybody put chains on me?

Yes, I’ve paid my dues to make it.

 

Everybody wants me to be

What they want me to be

I’m not happy when I try to fake it.

 

It’s all been said before,

How it is wrong to be chained: to have your spirit reduced.

Simply to the point.

Simply Magical! (Thank you Lionel!)

 

We will never know the joys that were crushed before ever being expressed.

How being restrained not only hurts the target, but also the perpetrator

Who deprives himself of receiving something given freely and selflessly.

 

Ideas are prevented from coming into existence when the spirit is afraid to venture forth.

Or worse, a heart is turned so hard that it joins the ranks of the oppressors,

And now finds worth and pleasure in spreading oppression.

 

Contrarians, possessed with such low self esteem, begin with “No, but”

when responding to another’s idea.  Somehow they have lost sight

of the fact that, “Yes, and” are also words in their vocabulary.

 

“Yes, and” keeps a conversation going and creates a space for experiencing new,

and different feelings, and maybe even that most wonderful healing drug: Laughter!

One can just as easily achieve one’s goal with “Yes, and” as with “No, but.”

 

Instead they try to set the tone and establish control.

They want to ring you round.

They have just told you they don’t care about you.

 

If you agree, you have condemned yourself to agree with them from that point on.

And if you disagree you risk losing a friendship or at the very least

witness the door of the arena for the exchange of ideas closing.

 

Welcome to the empath’s hell:

A world where one creates suffering when trying to erase it.

“Well, what’s it going to be boy?” (Paradise by the Dashboard Light.)

 

Impunity.

 

Inevitably, I come face to face with someone armed with their boundary marker and willing to use it.  I, too, have one.  Mine, I like to think, is so far out of reach as to not only be invisible but I would have to journey far to get it.

 

It’s others acting with impunity that rubs me wrong.  I consider myself the patron saint of lost causes, and am a self admitted dreamer.  When all is lost, I still wonder: Maybe.

 

Maybe there’s still time…

 

 

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