Asking Parents about HRT

[RaineOnYourParade]

How do I ask my parents about getting HRT? I'm not seeing a gender therapist or anything yet, so there's plenty of steps I have to take, but I don't know how to bring taking those steps up.

[Charlize]

Rather than jump right in with a conversation about HRT you might consider suggesting that you are having concerns about your gender.   That can be a platform that could allow some time with a therapist.  If you are seeing a therapist they might well be the best at explaining your issues to your parents.  I'd certainly start there .

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

[RaineOnYourParade]

@Charlize Thanks for the response. I'm not great with therapy or talking things out, so I haven't seen one since my mom last forced me to go, so that's not an option right now. I'll try my best to get around to the subject in time.

[Carolyn Marie]

I agree with @Charlizeon this, hon.  Asking for body changing, life changing medicine without setting the stage, without giving your parents the reasons why, without being able to articulate the need, is a recipe for disaster, IMO.  Do they have any idea that you are trans?  If they already know, then it's a different story, and makes more sense to me.  If they are clueless, then they will be extremely skeptical about your reasons and your need to do it. 

 

I get not being "great with therapy;"  a lot of people don't like talking about themselves, especially with strangers.  But a good gender therapist should quickly put you at ease.  They would not try to block you, but they would give you a whole lot more "evidence" of your need for HRT to present to your parents when the time comes.  Changing your body and your life requires more consideration than just, "I'm sure I'm trans and I want HRT." 

 

If you want to succeed at getting the medicine and need your parents permission, then you need to be able to talk to them with more than just a demand.  I know this isn't the answer you were looking for, but it's still the best answer you're going to get.

 

Carolyn Marie

[masons_ghost]

depends on if your out or not/ if they accept you or not

[VickySGV]

The Admins here are going to gang up on you about getting Gender Therapy since I fully agree with @Carolyn Marie as to what is needed here to actually HELP you in this.  I will however give one alternative and that is to discuss your feelings that come from your GD and how they are affecting you without necessarily directly saying you are self diagnosed Trans. 

 

If you are Neurodiverse that is going to change things on the direction that you will need to take, but you have not mentioned that yet. That will also need to be diagnosed by a therapist so it looks like you are in a slide chute toward that sort of thing.  I recognize that some therapists will not click with everyone who goes to them, and if they have only a single goal for the patient, that is even worse.  If your mother sent you to one to "Fix" a problem she diagnosed, and saw the therapist like a car mechanic who behaved like one I can also see a problem there.  If that is the case it is even more important for you to get someone else on your side which a therapist who has not agenda other than your personal care can do for you.  Call a local LGBTQ center for a referral or if your state has an Adolescent Medicine program that you can get into, where there is confidentiality from parents without your permission get into one of those as a first thing on trying to get medically prescribed hormone therapy.

[RaineOnYourParade]

They know I’m gender queer but I was wrong the first time around and need to re-come out haha 

 

Im just struggling even bringing up GT so it’s a lot

[Delcina B]

Hi Raine! I'm another for suggesting working with a gender therapist. An experienced GT is so important, ... when you're ready. You might take a look at a wonderful workbook You & Your Gender Identity by Dara Hoffman Fox, they are a GT. I found it very helpful when suggested to me here. And if by chance your parents saw it, it might be a segue to a conversation.

 

Good luck!

Delcina