Atlanta Trans Woman Sues AT & T For Discrimination, Unlawful Termination

[Carolyn Marie]

https://www.ajc.com/news/atlanta-news/transgender-woman-sues-att-for-3m-after-being-fired-alleges-discrimination/NM2RWAHODBBAJJYUPSWVGWEODM/

 

 

Whatever the merits of the case may be, her own description of her workplace transition is just about the worst way I can think of to manage it.  Absolutely appalling way to come out at work, IMO.

 

Carolyn Marie

[awkward-yet-sweet]

Well, the description in the article is brief.  Hard to tell how her announcement was actually done.  But people tend not to react well to surprises, and it seems that the brevity of her approach to longtime coworkers might have been a poor choice. 

 

That said, for the company to go from "star performer" with awards and high responsibilities to removal of responsibilities, ostracism, and being laid off - not hard to see the discrimination going on.

[emeraldmountain2]

7 hours ago, Carolyn Marie said:

Whatever the merits of the case may be, her own description of her workplace transition is just about the worst way I can think of to manage it.  Absolutely appalling way to come out at work, IMO.

Hi @Carolyn Marie. I'm thinking of ways to possibly come out at work and to avoid pitfalls. I was just wondering if you mean the way this person decided to come out is appalling or the way the her company allegedly treated her after coming out?

[Audrey]

 

@emeraldmountain2 For coming out at the job, I think the first thing to have a pulse on is the workplace culture. What are your relationships like with your colleagues, supervisors, administration, human resources? You will need them all for support. If your relationships are more distant, or primarily transactional, this may need some finesse. Until you come out, you cannot know how people will react, and some may come face-to-face with transphobia that they may not even know they had. Because of this, there will be questions that need to be considered. Just a few: What about working with clients who already know you? How you will dress for the workplace? Name change and pronouns? Bathrooms? Some professions have practice licenses as well (like mine does). While these may seem basic, having thought about them in advance will go a long way to avoiding the surprise and backlash described in the article.

 

In my case, I spoke with my colleagues individually, starting with those I felt the highest sense of trust and whom I worked most closely with. There was a bit of an impetus because some of the physical aspects of my transition were becoming obvious, especially that I was growing my hair out. When it became clear I could count on their support, I approached the ED and shared about my decision to come out publicly. She set a tone that the agency would have a welcoming culture and would support me, and that if I felt uncomfortable in some way, I should speak up to her. I never needed to do that even once! Then, to come out with clients, I decided to write a thoughtful letter about what I was doing and what people could expect. Fundamentally, I wanted them to understand that even though I was changing personally, my professional relationship with them was not.

 

I hope this helps clarify your thoughts!

 

Love,

~Audrey.

[emeraldmountain2]

Thank you so much @Audreyfor writing this helpful comment! I'm really happy to hear that it worked out well for you. As for my workplace, they claim to respect gender identity, I have a union to back me up, I've slowly tested the waters by speaking up for trans and nonbinary people in general, and have dressed in laid back women's clothing when I've gone into the office in order to gauge reaction. So far, so good, except for a few people in my department who might be ignorant, but they haven't show outright hostility to me. Also, sometimes some of the people in my personal life who I've expected to be mean turn out to be accepting and kind!

[Carolyn Marie]

2 hours ago, emeraldmountain2 said:

Hi @Carolyn Marie. I'm thinking of ways to possibly come out at work and to avoid pitfalls. I was just wondering if you mean the way this person decided to come out is appalling or the way the her company allegedly treated her after coming out?

 

I meant the way she chose to come out.  IMO, it is a terrible idea to just spring it on co-workers and managers by showing up one day dressed en femme and makeup and just announce, "Here I am!  And now treat me as a woman."

 

There is a process for transition at work that includes talking to HR and managers before hand, making sure that they understand the "rules of the road," including applicable Federal, state and local laws and company policies.  If you get the management on your side, they can help pave the way for a smooth transition and have your back.  Surprising ("shocking") them and all one's colleagues will lead to confusion, distrust, anger, miscommunication and god knows what else.

 

That doesn't excuse or mitigate the actions the company took afterwards, and she may have an excellent case.  But she set the stage for it, and that's on her.

 

Carolyn Marie

[emeraldmountain2]

Thank you for this info @Carolyn Marie

[Carolyn Marie]

@Audrey that is exactly what I am talking about, and kudos to you and your managers for doing things the right way, being thoughtful and keeping the feelings of co-workers and clients in mind.

 

I, too, sent out an e-mail message to my clients and circle of contacts explaining the what and the why.  It was very well received except by a very few.  As for my colleagues, I not only had a wonderful trans woman who did the "Trans 101" training for me, I also made a very personal speech to them and even did "brown bag lunches" so folks could come by and ask questions. It worked out very well, except for one transphobic former supervisor who did his best to sabotage my plans.  He didn't get any support for his "position."

 

Carolyn Marie

[emeraldmountain2]

At least I'm at the low end of the totem pole so I don't need to worry much about office politics, being knocked down from my perch, or coming out to clients. Having a union and being respected by my peers already I hope will help.

[emeraldmountain2]

1 minute ago, emeraldmountain2 said:

I don't need to worry much about office politics, being knocked down from my perch, or coming out to clients.

At least I hope I don't need to worry much. I agree that taking a systematic approach as you've both discussed is very wise.