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Marieh

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Welcome Marie.  We are at all kinds of places in our Trans journeys here on The Forums, you will fit right in.

 

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  • Forum Moderator

Welcome to Transgender Pulse Forums @Marieh as @VickySGV mentions, we’re all in various stages of transition. The best thing about this is if you have a question about something, there is someone else who has the same question and others who’ve been through it will answer to the best of their ability. 
 

Best wishes, stay positive and motivated 

 

Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋

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Welcome to the forum, Marie!!! You'll find lots of information and wonderful people here. Jump in wherever you feel comfortable.

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Once you’ve made 5 posts you should be able to comment on any subject without admiration or moderators approval. 

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2 minutes ago, Marieh said:

Still being  moderatedcof course in case I'm a creep.

You’re going to be fine and others will start engaging you in conversation. 
 

Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️

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Oh OK, now I'm  stuck for something to say. Hi everyone. A little about myself. I finally accepted myself as transgender a few years ago after a lifetime of denial. A familiar story of course. 

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One of the best things about the forums I love, is that regardless of which side of transition you’re on MtF, FtM or nonbinary. People will support you and share their thoughts. 
 

Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋

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Interestingly this forum is identical to a hobbyist website I occasionally visit. If only they  knew.  Lol

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There are so many of us in the same situation, and working to come out of the preverbal closet. My circle of family and friends who are learning about my transition is growing. One of my two sisters has disowned me and forbidden me from her home. My other siblings are very reluctant to be open and supportive. They support me in private but have conditions on what they want to see. 
 

Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋

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Just now, Mmindy said:

There are so many of us in the same situation, and working to come out of the preverbal closet. My circle of family and friends who are learning about my transition is growing. One of my two sisters has disowned me and forbidden me from her home. My other siblings are very reluctant to be open and supportive. They support me in private but have conditions on what they want to see. 
 

Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋

I have  four sisters. Two found out early but never mentioned it again. One my closest, I  came out to in recent years and she  complained I didn't trust her, so she's fully accepting. My wife worked it out. But doesn't want to know. I also know others who know but only allude to it. 

 

So yes complicated. None of it helpful to my mental health. Because everyone makes it about them. Even my wife acknowledges how hard it is for me while asking me to understand how tough it is for her.

 

So I suppress it for them all. I shouldn't but that's life.

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Hi Marie,

 

Glad that you found us. What are some of your hobbies?

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Hobbies? I spent the last few years  bringing up two boys. I was essentially a housewife. I loved it but lately my 17 year old told me that I should find time for myself. I  think I did a good job on him. Lol

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  • Posts

    • Nonexistent
      I have the same problem as you, my face is the main reason why I get misgendered I'm pretty sure. I think it's mostly up to genetics how your face will look (T can help, but still genetics will determine how you end up). You can't change your facial structure really, you can get facial masculinization surgery but it's expensive so not an option for most unless you're rich lol.    Experimentally (I haven't done it but want to), you could see if any plastic surgeons around you will give you Kybella in your cheeks. It is an injection that removes fat, and is usually used underneath the chin/on the neck below the jawline, but some may use it off-label on the face. The only potential problem with this is that if your face would naturally thin out at an older age, it could thin out extra and make you look older (though I'm not certain on this). Another option is to get filler in your jaw/chin, which would make your jawline look more square and your face more masculine. I want jaw filler but I'm poor lol, it only lasts one year up to a few years depending on what kind you get, so it would have to be done every so often and can get expensive. I did get chin filler once, only 2 small vials so it didn't make that big of a difference. I would recommend going for the jaw if you can only choose 1, I wish I had done that.   Those are the only options I know of that will bring legitimate noticeable changes.
    • April Marie
      Welcome to the forums, Blake!! We are happy that you found us!!
    • Mmindy
      Good evening Blake.   Welcome to Transgender Pulse Forums.   Best wishes, stay positive and motivated.   Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋
    • Nonexistent
      Thank you.    Trans men and trans women each have their own struggles for sure, but I agree, it can be a hard time to be a non-passing trans guy. There is no specific "man clothes" that only men wear. People could just think I'm butch (which sucks to think about, if people think I'm a lesbian when I'm a dude!!). I mean I would feel better if I got gendered correctly even if I don't fully pass, it would maybe raise my confidence to think maybe I do pass well lol! Instead I'm just reminded I don't.   Though I may just focus on the times I don't pass and ignore the times that I do. Because I rarely remember getting gendered correctly, but I hone in on the times that I don't. 
    • Nonexistent
      Thank you, I'm glad to be here. :)   I have been in therapy for 9 years but still can't seem to accept myself. I think it has to do with growing up trans in a world that hates us, especially in the south. I mean I was discriminated against by adults and ostracized as a kid/teen due to being trans. My family is accepting, but the rest of the world is not. I realize now a lot of people are accepting (even unexpectedly, like my partner's conservative republican Trump-loving parents lol), but it feels like my brain is still in survival mode every time I exit the door. I am a very fearful person.   My body still may change over time, but it feels like I haven't met the same 'quota' (don't know the right word) that a majority of other trans guys have on far less time on T. Most trans guys pass easily 1-3yrs on T, I'm double that and still don't pass well except my voice.
    • Nonexistent
      Thank you. I am just used to seeing trans guys who pass at like... 6 months to 1 year, at the most 3 years. And I just don't meet the mark, all the way at 6 years. It is possible with time I will masculinize more, but it's frustrating when I'm "behind" and may never catch up. It threatens my mental health mostly, possibly my physical health if I'm visibly trans (though I don't ever go out alone). 
    • Adrianna Danielle
      Boss is happy with everything with me and said I will be the only one that works on one customer's truck.This customer saw me clean a small grease spot in the inter of his Kenworh last week,on the steering wheel.A new customer too,saw me walk out with my tub o' towels wiping that grease stain off.This one,he cannot stand a grease spot in the interior.
    • Nonexistent
      Yeah, I am grieving the man I "should" have been. He will never exist, especially not in my youth. But I don't know how to healthily go about it instead of fixating on the life that could have been.
    • EasyE
    • VickySGV
      Going to the conventions has been one of my ways to deal with this stuff. 
    • Nonexistent
      Sorry it took me a while to respond!    I would like to get to know you. :) I only have mental disabilities. Schizoaffective disorder, depression, and anxiety. The last two are severe and very treatment-resistant. I did have physical problems for some time, but it was caused by an antipsychotic medication (Invega). It basically crippled me, muscle weakness/fatigue, basically could barely walk (used mobility devices) and doctors were useless since they didn't suspect the medication I was on! I've finally ditched antipsychotics (hopefully for good, unless my symptoms come back). I usually don't share like this, especially in person, but hey, I'm anonymous. :)   I'm not expecting reciprocation at all btw, these things are personal. There is more to us than disabilities, so tell me about yourself if you still wanna talk!
    • EasyE
      thanks for the insight ... good to know things are being well thought-out ... it is no easy topic for sure, as many of us on here have been wrestling with this stuff for years and decades...
    • Ashley0616
      @KymmieLWOW! He is absolutely horrible! Definitely one of the worst boss's. 
    • KymmieL
      Well the boss is at it again. They misplaced a work order thinking I was the last one who had it, yesterday morning. I know where it is. Last thing I did with it was put it back on the counter. He accused me a couple times of having it last and put it somewhere. Come to find out, the other boss (his wife) had taken it. she put the work order paper in the recycle box.   Has he apologized about the accusations. He!! no. I am waiting for hadies to get frost bit.   So that was my morning.  But it is finally warming up here. currently 63 and windy.   Hugs, Kymmie
    • MAN8791
      I am gender fluid, leaning heavily towards trans masc. My eldest is male and despite all the "stuff" we deal with with him (autism, speech delay, etc) I found him to be easy to raise. When my middle kid (female) was born, literally the first words out of my mouth were "I don't know how to raise a girl!" And I really felt I didn't know. She showed me. She's still showing me how to exist as comfortable and completely secure in her gender expression. It is entirely awe inspiring to see all three of them feel so settled in their bodies in ways that I never, ever felt or feel to this day.
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