Gender dysphria to point where feel sick

[FinnyFinsterHH]

Most of my days are good but whenever i realize my chest is there i get physically sick and had pit in my stomach. I dont think binder will help, i have tried to layer sport bra and cant get binder due to parent. Any tips for when this happens?

[Vidanjali]

@FinnyFinsterHH I am sorry to hear you're struggling so much. I'll start by saying I understand how this feels because I too have had episodes where I've gotten very upset about my chest to the point of panic or depression. So, I will offer what advice I can, but understand I know it's not easily done, though there are ways through it. Gradually think about whether someone you know can help get you a binder. Until then, because you feel this way when you realize your chest is there, you can work on developing mental techniques to get your mind off dwelling on your chest. You'll realize your chest is there throughout the day, of course, because the chest is a prominent part of the body.

 

First, think about addressing the physical reaction. Drink a glass of water and take several deep breaths. This can help to calm your body.

 

I strongly recommend mindfulness and meditation practices. You can practice techniques throughout the day, wherever you are. For example, say you catch a glimpse of yourself in a reflective surface and begin to feel sick, seeing the chest. Take a moment and instead cast your glance on anything around you, preferably something in nature like looking up at the sky or at a tree. Describe the object you're viewing in neutral terms meaning describe the color, texture, shape, borders, patterns, etc.; but avoid personal or emotional description such as, "It makes me feel..." or "It reminds me of...". This will redirect your mind away from dwelling on your body shape and calm the nervous system. There are many more mindfulness practices you can find online.

 

You can also try using a CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) journal app. In such an app will guide you to describe what upset you, the feelings, thoughts, and beliefs involved, analyzing and reframing them. 

 

Finally, consider developing a regular meditation practice. This will strengthen your mind and gradually you will find yourself less prone to feeling consumed by upsetting events. 

 

I should also mention, if you are artistic, consider channeling your experience into artistic expression. This has worked for me before - I've created a few art pieces addressing my experience of gender dysphoria. in such a way that felt empowering - like I owned it instead of it owning me.

 

None of these things is a quick fix. Nor should they be because what you're dealing with is a deep issue. But will sustained effort you can find your way to living with more peace and comfort.

[Charlize]

The thoughts and suggestions above are certainly excellent!  I might also suggest that you continue to reach out to the trans community where your feelings are understood through experience.  I have found that helpful.  The is especially true when i try to help another in distress, not to look for a fellow sufferer but to help another find a path to self acceptance and peace.  Funny how helping another can pull me out of my own funk.

We are here to help as we can.  Remember you are not alone in your feelings.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

[FinnyFinsterHH]

Thank you for the advice, it sometimes helps to know other people in the community feel the same way I do.