Torn

[mattie22]

I am kinda torn knowing  living as a female when It is savfer for me to do so I would enjoy yet afraid hat if I go all the way I may regret it or jfeel like I would be letting down that tpart of me tht i built up over the years asmale and the prt of e that is ok with seeing my self as male.

But it not like i ever comply fit in with other males i have always had parts of me that fit better with being female and that shoes up in my as gender noncomfing tendices.

I am not sure on how to hadle these feelings.

[VickySGV]

One of my first suggestions here is to find a nearby LGBTQ Center and join a support group for Non-binary individuals which is going to have a wide base of people in your position although some who have been doing it for a while.  It will be a safe environment that will be non-judgmental toward you  however you present around them.

 

Next issue is going to be finding counseling on Gender Issues, the same LGBTQ center with the peer support groups may also know of therapists who are Gender Therapists, and who, if they cannot use your insurance will deal with you on an "ability to pay" sliding scale. 

[April Marie]

Welcome to TGP. Conflicting feelings are normal for many, most, perhaps all of us especially during the questioning phase. Vicky offers great advice. Finding people who understand what you are going through will help tremendously in answering your questions and finding your own reality.

 

Best of luck as you move forward!

[Ivy]

Welcome Mattie.

[Mmindy]

Good afternoon and welcome to Transgender Pulse Forum @mattie22

 

@VickySGVcovered the best advice, so the only thing I can add is you're in a safe place here to be who you really are. Look around and join in on any of the conversations that interest you.

 

Best wishes, stay positive, and motivated,

 

Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋

[KayC]

Nice to meet you @mattie22 , and Welcome!

Your feelings are very normal.  I felt much the same at the beginning of my Journey.  But, in fact it is a 'journey' that is unique to each of our individual lives.  There is not a specific or pre-determined destination.  That's up to you to discover as you find your way.

You already received some great Encouragement here.  I hope stay with us, and you will both discover and contribute. 

Deeps breaths ... one step at a time